Got one regular who keeps on saying sorry each time he calls to book.oh sorry have I disturbed you
Oh sorry your not free then
Oh sorry I can't make it then .
Sorry have  i called you at a bad time.
I did gently tell him you don't need to keep saying sorry each time you call.
If I was busy I would answer  the call 
He's visiting this morning 

Oh sorry hope he turns out okay.

When they turn up with a literal list of things they want to do and keep checking it during the booking to make sure they’ve ticked everything off.

Wow! I've never experienced that! Mental checklists/box - ticking, yes. But not a literal list.

if anyone pinches or bites on my nipple too hard, I always say - oh is that what you like to receive? let me bite you back properly!!
they always flinch - ohhhh no no no, thats painful!
well exactly! its painful to me too!
and then usually the sessions go back to nice and gentle!

hahahah I do the exact same also when they twisting my breast nipples as if they are looking for a radio station.

I look at them like WTF then say are you searching for your radio station - them no - me ok let me find it on yours so I do it back but harder then they get the point. 

What is it that some clients do in the bathroom ?? He was in there for 5 minutes and when i went in after to get cleaned up I was shocked! Shower gel all over the shower and the entire floor is wet.All my bottles are tipped over. WTF? HUH? Do some people need a tutorial on how to use a bathroom?   

Showed up with the notes folded over, I excused myself to check it and it was 15 quid less than my rate! This is a repeat client so he knows the correct rate, and then says 'oh, I thought it was xx" No. its not.

I then stood by as he fumbles through his pockets, and starts counting coins.

Cheeky sod. Because I was ready, dressed and he was already there I decided to do the booking. But super annoyed about this.

Just because they are repeat clients doesn't mean they won't try to con you. 

Showed up with the notes folded over, I excused myself to check it and it was 15 quid less than my rate! This is a repeat client so he knows the correct rate, and then says 'oh, I thought it was xx" No. its not.

I then stood by as he fumbles through his pockets, and starts counting coins.

Cheeky sod. Because I was ready, dressed and he was already there I decided to do the booking. But super annoyed about this.

Just because they are repeat clients doesn't mean they won't try to con you. 

Similar happened to me last week...a client I've seen loads under paid by 10, I hadn't checked it for that very reason...Anyway I texted him a few minutes after he had left and said its 10 short, his response was that he definitely put the right amount there, I repeated again its 10 short, his next reply was that if I don't believe him then he is going to block me forever, I said again that its 10 short... Him: "Ok I'm blocking you" Me: "Ok bye" 


I just look on it as a lesson learned to me to always count the money straight away.

Or worse, immediately attacking the clit and the nipples (not the lovely area on and around the breasts) Just the clit and nipples only ...urggghhh! 

 This. This really really grinds my gears. FFS.

Had the same today, new client though. So fucking rude.