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Author Topic: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?  (Read 19465 times)

Ooohlala

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #30 on: 19 November 2009, 12:40:12 pm »

A very light skinned, not so well endowed Asian gentleman kept telling me to suck on this big black cock... I kept looking for one but I couldn't see the one he was talking about!!  :P

Alexa

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #31 on: 19 November 2009, 07:01:48 pm »
Onion bums and banana boobs. What's with the food comparisions, lol?! Men. *rolls eyes*
A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left.

Fallingstar

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #32 on: 20 November 2009, 08:20:17 am »
Onion bums and banana boobs. What's with the food comparisions, lol?! Men. *rolls eyes*

Well they do say the way to a mans heart is through his stomach ;D

Penny

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #33 on: 23 November 2009, 02:44:14 pm »
This isnt exactly weird but made me giggle.  Had a new guy on Friday, been trying for a little while to see me, just hadnt been able to get the timing right until friday.

After the bedroom fun we were curled up chatting, and he asked me what else I do as I seem so busy.  Told him that I do volunteer work and am studying along with the escorting.  He said 'Oh you do escorting too do you!'.  Not sure what he thought I was doing while with him then lol

Hugs

Penny x x x

cassie

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #34 on: 25 November 2009, 09:24:17 pm »
He said 'Oh you do escorting too do you!'.  Not sure what he thought I was doing while with him then lol

Hehe, that is funny
Live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the ground in the morning, Satan shudders and says: "Oh shit, she's awake!"

lady69

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #35 on: 29 November 2009, 08:50:48 am »
So I get a phone call from this gent yesterday who sounded a bit pervy by the way, but I thought I would indulge him and see where  this goes our conversation went something like this:

Him: Do you like gifts?
Me: Yes I do (pfff what girl doesn't like gifts)
Him: Can I send you a gift without seeing/meeting you ever  :o
Me: Err you bring your gift along when you come and see me  (of course at this point my weirdo dar is buzzing thinking this guy just wants my address for his dubious means)
 muttered to myself  weirdo after hanging up
"The only things in this life that you really regret are the RISKS you didn't take"

EmilyJones

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #36 on: 29 November 2009, 08:56:02 am »
Him: Can I send you a gift without seeing/meeting you ever  :o
Me: Err you bring your gift along when you come and see me  (of course at this point my weirdo dar is buzzing thinking this guy just wants my address for his dubious means)

Haha, maybe he just wanted to send you a pair of socks! What a Samaritan. ;D
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Ooohlala

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #37 on: 29 November 2009, 11:34:36 am »
Okay... this isn't weird, but to me hilarious all the same,

A client texted Friday night to ask if I fancied a drink, I said no, I don't work evenings or weekends, he then replied and this is the funny bit..."I didn't mean work wise, just a drink and a meal, no strings attached"  (by which I guess he meant, free of charge!) They just don't get it sometimes do they?? Needless to say he didn't get a reply.

I'm sure some clients think we do this out of the goodness of our hearts, bless their little cottons!

x
« Last Edit: 29 November 2009, 11:36:35 am by Ooohlala »

Alexxx

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #38 on: 29 November 2009, 08:48:47 pm »
I was with a client last week and he said to me in a genuinely shocked voice -"Oh! My wife doesn't do it like that"

I swear I had to bite my tongue. Some of the potential replies included:
Well, I did wonder why married men come to see me  ::)
Is that why you're here paying me then?
I'm not your wife, thank heaven for small mercies
Your Wife probably doesn't fuck strangers for a living   :P- I've had practise lol
She's not getting paid for it so might not feel the need to try hard
Did you ever ask her to do it differently?

And so on. I feel for the wives of these men. Some of them anyway.
I'm going to bed to my husband now, gonna tell him It's mish or nothing baby.....x

Ooohlala

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #39 on: 29 November 2009, 10:27:30 pm »
Mish?? Sorry if I sound dumb but what is that? Bless this site for teaching you new things ha ha ha  ;D

xxx

Vanessa

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #40 on: 29 November 2009, 10:45:22 pm »
Mish - short for "missionary" - as in missionary position.  :)

Ooohlala

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #41 on: 29 November 2009, 10:46:33 pm »
Errrr..... how stupid do I feel now  ??? lol

x

Vanessa

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #42 on: 29 November 2009, 10:55:38 pm »
Don't worry about it - there's still quite a few terms I'm not familiar with  (or want to be come to that  ;D).  Reminds me of the time when someone rang and asked me if I did CP.  When I asked him what CP was he said "obviously not" and rang off!  It's Corporal Punishment  :)

Alexxx

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #43 on: 29 November 2009, 10:56:48 pm »
Its not the most exciting position in the world is it, but it does work  ;)

Don't feel silly hunni, you'll soon pick up the lingo x

Ooohlala

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Re: Wierdest thing a client has ever said to you?
« Reply #44 on: 29 November 2009, 11:09:36 pm »
I know but that one was so obvious with hindsight! The strangest thing is though that seems to be the most popular position with the clients I've had so far???

x