OK, I have 2 from yesterday.
TWAT 1: Hi CG, how much do you charge, how big are your tits? Do I have to wear a condom?
ME: Hi, OK have you had a look at my ad you got my number from, all those details are on there. Maybe have a read of that and if you still want to book get back to me then? As for condoms, of course you do.
TWAT 1: Well, could you just get me off over the phone first and then I'll book?

The second, all via text which all my advertising says I don't respond to:
TWAT: A quick BJ?
TWAT: ???x
TWAT: Not out tonight? x
TWAT: Just a quick bj? x
TWAT: U Calling? He (sic) a quick bj?
TWAT: Hey can't call no cred only free texts xx
TWAT: If free now head to mines xx (Because I can mind read and know where he lives?)
TWAT: Shame xx
TWAT: Why not speaking? x
TWAT: EH12 xx (EH12 is a bit area, am I supposed to stand there shouting and hope he hears or what?)
TWAT: Hey im just looking for a quick bj lol but only got a small amount in the house so thats a shame. If u do want to come for like 5 mins and make a profit then EH12 xxxxx
TWAT: 5 min for like 20 quid if you want. just need something lol. If you reply via a text yes or no I'll leave you alone lovely x (Oh hold me back! The 'lovely' really pissed me off. And I think you'll be leaving me alone very shortly regardless....)
TWAT: Wil assume a no. Take care xxx (no shit sherlock)
TWAT: I wish u could xxx
Twat 2 is now on my ignore list as '?20 BJ guy'.....