Quote from: Steele on 29 November 2011, 09:05:17 am

Life isn't risk free and this is the way I've found of working that works for me I'm not saying giving out your full address is the best way, it's not the safest, but it's not as chaotic and dangerous as some ladies assume it would be

I totally agree with your logic here - withholding an address til the last minute won't protect you if some random absolute nutcase decides he will do whatever it takes to hurt you; he probably won't find following directions from a nearby landmark much of a deterrent! And as you say, that nutcase is probably just as likely (or more likely, even, if you look at statistics?) to be an ex-boyfriend or someone who really knows you, so they'll have your address (or will stalk you first) anyway.

However, I would argue that the point of withholding the address until the last possible minute is actually to create a faff where one doesn't need to be. It's the same as (in my case) requiring a 9am confirmation call for all appointments. Does speaking to a man at 9am enable you to immediately know for 100% certain whether or not he's a total psychopath? Unfortunately not. But does it tell you that he values and respects your rules and your time and your safety? To a certain extent, yes. So again, you're not going to weed out the true psychopath who is able to fool anyone into believing he's a normal person until the last minute when things turn into a horror movie, but how many of those actually exist? An escort generally just needs to protect herself from idiots, chancers and the most common type of criminal, the "If I Reckon I Can Get Away With This, I'll Try It" type.

Your on-site security obviously deals with those far better than anything else, so I envy you having an arrangement like that. But I use security calls to a friend who knows where I am and when I should be finished (cos I call or text again at the end) to hopefully provide a similar protection from anyone who might have evil plans but who isn't going to carry them out if he discovers that you're not alone, so definitely recommend having a safety buddy to the OP. Also, I usually take just one appointment a day, or sometimes a lunchtime one and an 'after-work' one or whatever, so I can afford to spend a few minutes directing a client to my incall place on the phone. Working at a higher volume with on-site security is obviously going to mean those minutes would just be unnecessarily wasted.

Another thing in favour of not giving out a full address at any point is the way the human brain works, particularly short-term memory. An 'aroused' (in psychology terms! i.e. nervous, excited) person will struggle to retain auditory information while simultaneously navigating an unfamiliar environment. Okay, I don't know if there's a study been done that's precisely like that, but the formal research that does exist supports my personal investigations! My clients can never remember the very simple directions to my incall on the second or even third visits (possibly excepting the ones who are already vary familiar with this part of Central London) cos there's too much sensory information and mental activity going on simultaneously to allow much memory storage to happen, which is frankly brilliant. They always have to call me again when they visit again, which might not really mean that much in the grand scheme but it's a factor that makes me feel a bit better than, say, them having my full address in their punting phone which they could leave at the office or their wife could find.

Your typings on memory are spot on - the problems I've had on those few occasions I have given my address out, well they involved either misinterpretting the address, guys thinking they 'know' where the address is (and it isn't!!!), or plain forgetting it. I've also had guys leave their phone either at home, or in their car thus when they forgot directions it caused real problems for both sides ie had to try find a payphone, then didn't have enough change(they charge a lot for calls to mobiles), or wandered around for half an hour before eventually figuring it all out.

I prefer to give step by step stuff, then the client gets to me with minimal hassle. Those who really are intent on harm will get around this, or at least comply - that's why it's important to take other steps to watch your own back too.

How do you keep calm when you first meet a new client? Are you thinking about whether he might attack you? Or am I just being paranoid?

I think you are wise to keep a level of paranoia with clients
as potentially your life may be on the line.
As to what I'm thinking?
It goes along the lines of:
"Will you be the one to snuff out my life"
but that is not healthy, nor particularly common among other escorts.

What I would say, and I suspect others here will empathise.
A new client is an unknown.
But conversely, a regular can be a danger too. You might relax your guard.
Or more likely, they may have got comfortable in a subsequent visit
to the point where they may be prepared to push boundaries in whatever way they want to try.

This is a little unfair as a huge % {99.8%} are lovely men who would never do anything bad to me.
But in this high risk environment I am in.
The closest analogy for me is ice skating {not that I do actually ice skate, well not for years  }
Till the client leaves, I am balancing on ice skates,
hugely aware of the risks of a fall.  I never fully relax till they leave and my front door is locked.