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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2599063 times)

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2685 on: 30 April 2012, 02:34:09 am »
I'm sure I'm not the only one to receive this!

"hey there Add me on skype names chocowa** i alo have msn, the thought of a woman watch wank turns me on and i do it for free"

HE DOES IT FOR FREE LADIES!! Nice orderly queue please, no pushing in!!!


(WARNING LADIES, click on his profile ONLY if you wanna see a 2-tone (bright pink helmet/dark brown shaft) dick, cos that's the only thing worth looking at! (apart from the fact his duvet cover makes it look like he has some weird skin disease)...)

bananamuffin

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2686 on: 30 April 2012, 09:55:25 am »
I've had overnighters in the past for ?300 - would this be possible?

My reply would have been: No.

bananamuffin

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2687 on: 30 April 2012, 09:59:24 am »
the thought of a woman watch wank turns me on and i do it for free[/i]"

Ye Gods, how obsessed can you be about a body part that, let's face it, is designed for function and only in some cases could be considered a thing of beauty? Can you imagine if we were like that, hands down our skirts forever readjusting our clits/labia in public, counting how many times a day we felt a bit horny and insisting on telling everyone about it, and endlessly sending pics of our vag's to men who didn't want or ask for them?!!!!

ladyjennaj

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2688 on: 30 April 2012, 10:20:35 am »
I have seen one particular client before, and he wanted to book me again today. However, he asked if my security needed to be there, because it's 'sordid'  :-\ This really really annoyed me.

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2689 on: 30 April 2012, 12:46:07 pm »
the thought of a woman watch wank turns me on and i do it for free[/i]"

Ye Gods, how obsessed can you be about a body part that, let's face it, is designed for function and only in some cases could be considered a thing of beauty? Can you imagine if we were like that, hands down our skirts forever readjusting our clits/labia in public, counting how many times a day we felt a bit horny and insisting on telling everyone about it, and endlessly sending pics of our vag's to men who didn't want or ask for them?!!!!

LMAO!!! That gave me a giggle to start the day!  :D

bananamuffin

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2690 on: 30 April 2012, 06:19:01 pm »
I've already had Mr "I've got an incredibly small penis should I have it extended so it's 2ft long but only 3mm wide man", now this - do you think it's the same bloke or a different one?!!?  This could be my first job you know. If only I were available at the time(s) he needs (I genuinely am not available though lol!!):

Dear Bananmuffin,
I am a 57 year old businessman from Scotland who visits Birmingham on a regular basis. I have enjoyed viewing your website and Adultwork profile and would like to humbly request an appointment. I am visiting Birmingham tomorrow and, with apologies for the short notice, wondered whether you might be available for a one hour or one and a half hour appointment from around 11.45 am tomorrow morning (I arrive at New Street at 11.10) or alternatively an appointment in the early evening?
The services that I would be interested in, with your permission, are:
Foot worship;
Over the knee spanking (you giving, me receiving);
Humiliation (you giving, me receiving; I have a small penis and just one very small testicle and I am unable to satisfy my wife sexually; as a consequence she has had numerous affairs during our marriage including with my best friend and with one of my brothers);
Oral (me giving, you receiving);
Rimming (me giving, you receiving);
Hand relief (but only if you consider that I deserve it).
Please accept my sincere apologies if any of my suggestions cause offence. I am very submissive and would welcome the opportunity to spoil and pamper you; to worship and adore you; and to be humiliated and laughed at by you (mission accomplished ha ha ha!!).
Once again, please accept my apologies for the short notice of my request for an appointment. Should you be available and consider me worthy of an appointment please let me know what time would be convenient and what fee would be payable.
I hope to hear from you. Yours submissively, Halfsack).

Views ladies?

bananamuffin

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2691 on: 30 April 2012, 06:22:37 pm »
the thought of a woman watch wank turns me on and i do it for free[/i]"

Ye Gods, how obsessed can you be about a body part that, let's face it, is designed for function and only in some cases could be considered a thing of beauty? Can you imagine if we were like that, hands down our skirts forever readjusting our clits/labia in public, counting how many times a day we felt a bit horny and insisting on telling everyone about it, and endlessly sending pics of our vag's to men who didn't want or ask for them?!!!!

LMAO!!! That gave me a giggle to start the day!  :D

Then my day is complete!!!!!

Ellie_e

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2692 on: 30 April 2012, 07:10:58 pm »
I'm interested in an overnight booking in the next few weeks. This would be at a top hotel in central London, most likely around Kensington.

The night would include drinks and possibly a club for a little dirty dancing and further flirting. Then back to the hotel for some great sex.

Are you able to do anything rates wise at all? I hate asking that! I've had overnighters in the past for ?300 - would this be possible?


If you hate asking, then why ask?
If you can afford a top hotel then why cannot you pay the price of stated for an overnight?
And if you have had overnighters in the past for ?300, then get in touch with them instead!

Cannot believe this guy is still trying this bullsh*t!!  He's been sending the same email for months....

Hot Pepper

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2693 on: 30 April 2012, 08:02:02 pm »

received this evening

Heyy There Babe,

I Was Just Contacting You To Tell You That If Your Interested In Doing A Free Session?

(((Check My Profile))) I'm 19 And sexy Spanish :)

> I Would Lick Your Pussy + Asshole Or Do Anything Else You Want :)

Also I Could Only Travel To Your Home Or Hotel

Take Caree x X x


IIRESISTIBLE !!!!!!
And Still I Rise, Maya Angelou a real inspiration x

amy

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2694 on: 30 April 2012, 08:09:49 pm »

received this evening

Heyy There Babe,

I Was Just Contacting You To Tell You That If Your Interested In Doing A Free Session?

(((Check My Profile))) I'm 19 And sexy Spanish :)

> I Would Lick Your Pussy + Asshole Or Do Anything Else You Want :)

Also I Could Only Travel To Your Home Or Hotel

Take Caree x X x


IIRESISTIBLE !!!!!!

Am I the only person who hasn't had this one? :(

Kristina Bristol Escort

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2695 on: 30 April 2012, 08:26:23 pm »
No Amy I did not have this one either.  Maybe we did something wrong to be excluded from such a devine offer LOL x

ana30

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2696 on: 30 April 2012, 08:49:17 pm »
Quote
Dear Bananmuffin,
I am a 57 year old businessman from Scotland who visits Birmingham on a regular basis. I have enjoyed viewing your website and Adultwork profile and would like to humbly request an appointment. I am visiting Birmingham tomorrow and, with apologies for the short notice, wondered whether you might be available for a one hour or one and a half hour appointment from around 11.45 am tomorrow morning (I arrive at New Street at 11.10) or alternatively an appointment in the early evening?
The services that I would be interested in, with your permission, are:
Foot worship;
Over the knee spanking (you giving, me receiving);
Humiliation (you giving, me receiving; I have a small penis and just one very small testicle and I am unable to satisfy my wife sexually; as a consequence she has had numerous affairs during our marriage including with my best friend and with one of my brothers);
Oral (me giving, you receiving);
Rimming (me giving, you receiving);
Hand relief (but only if you consider that I deserve it).
Please accept my sincere apologies if any of my suggestions cause offence. I am very submissive and would welcome the opportunity to spoil and pamper you; to worship and adore you; and to be humiliated and laughed at by you (mission accomplished ha ha ha!!).
Once again, please accept my apologies for the short notice of my request for an appointment. Should you be available and consider me worthy of an appointment please let me know what time would be convenient and what fee would be payable.
I hope to hear from you. Yours submissively, Halfsack).

Views ladies?

Charge him double. Tell him it's because you always do as you please in sessions and don't like following orders (he as a long list of them) and that's why you're charging him double.
Mornings were made for sleeping, wild sex and bacon.

drizzyfan

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2697 on: 30 April 2012, 09:13:17 pm »
Do I have stupid idiot plastered on me or something??


another guy asking for 300 quid overnighters at my place (I say outcall only) and that he would love to fuck me in harrods I reply:


Where does it say incalls are available on my profile?

And why would I meet you for an overnight for only ?300? That is insulting.

I would never have sex in harrods or any other public place as that is not discreet.

Please read profiles before sending the same generic message out.


And he replied calling me a stupid bitch; first time someone has been rude to me, i thought my message was fine? -_-

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2698 on: 30 April 2012, 11:51:30 pm »
I've already had Mr "I've got an incredibly small penis should I have it extended so it's 2ft long but only 3mm wide man", now this - do you think it's the same bloke or a different one?!!?  This could be my first job you know. If only I were available at the time(s) he needs (I genuinely am not available though lol!!):

Dear Bananmuffin,
I am a 57 year old businessman from Scotland who visits Birmingham on a regular basis. I have enjoyed viewing your website and Adultwork profile and would like to humbly request an appointment. I am visiting Birmingham tomorrow and, with apologies for the short notice, wondered whether you might be available for a one hour or one and a half hour appointment from around 11.45 am tomorrow morning (I arrive at New Street at 11.10) or alternatively an appointment in the early evening?
The services that I would be interested in, with your permission, are:
Foot worship;
Over the knee spanking (you giving, me receiving);
Humiliation (you giving, me receiving; I have a small penis and just one very small testicle and I am unable to satisfy my wife sexually; as a consequence she has had numerous affairs during our marriage including with my best friend and with one of my brothers);
Oral (me giving, you receiving);
Rimming (me giving, you receiving);
Hand relief (but only if you consider that I deserve it).
Please accept my sincere apologies if any of my suggestions cause offence. I am very submissive and would welcome the opportunity to spoil and pamper you; to worship and adore you; and to be humiliated and laughed at by you (mission accomplished ha ha ha!!).
Once again, please accept my apologies for the short notice of my request for an appointment. Should you be available and consider me worthy of an appointment please let me know what time would be convenient and what fee would be payable.
I hope to hear from you. Yours submissively, Halfsack).

Views ladies?

Hmm. He SOUNDS genuine, but the email is a little long. However, he IS sub, so that may explain it.

I would humour him, don't give him lengthy messages back, keep it to the "yes, I'm free, you need to call at X time tomorrow" whatever, booking procedures etc so that he doesn't get free sex chat or wank fodder and see where it goes.

If he DOES turn out to be your first: Good luck and tell us how it went!  ;D

BBW_Cora

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2699 on: 01 May 2012, 12:35:35 am »
I agree with Cat he sounds genuine to me, humiliation emails can be hard to tell, especially the bit about his wife having affairs with his best friend and brother (potential wanking material) but he has most likely included that in his email so that you can use it to belittle and humiliate him with :)

Like Cat, I would keep emails clear and to the point.  ;)
..Some would say I am selling my body but I know I am selling so much more than that..