Just read Friday's Crazy Greek Man email request and I am sat here, literally crying with laughter!
I've quoted quite a bit of the post, to illustrate that he clearly wants fairly straightforward stuff and can't spell very well.

Quote from: Friday on 29 September 2011, 04:17:37 pm

This ones rather special......

In this point I would like to ask you some things about our time together?..

1) I love giving anal sex. Is that ok? (I have a medium size coc?)
2) I love giving and recievingg oral without condom and I love it when my woman swallows.. Is that ok?
3) 69 is ok with you?
4) I love if you shit on my face and I lick your pussy for a very long time. Is that ok?
5) I loved it when the woman stroke, lick and kiss all my body. Is that ok?
6) Is it ok if Imake the same to you?
7) It make me crazy horny when a woman stroke, lick, kiss and take gently to her mouth my balls. Is that ok with you?
Making shower together is ok?
9) Making sex to the shower is ok?
10) Is it ok if we are completely nacked all the time that we are the two of us private?
11) Sub games is ok?
12) I like to be the Master and my woman to be the slave. Is that ok? (No pain things at all)
13) Role playing?
14) I like to tie and tease my woman and I like it when she make the same. Is that ok?
15) Is it ok if I give light spanking? (No pain things at all)
16) Would you do me massage?
17) Would you try to make me striptease?
18) I love doggy. Is that ok?
19) I love spooning sex. Is that ok?
20) But most of the times I like my woman on top (Cowgirl) facing both ways. Is that ok with you?
21) I am smoking. Is that ok with you?
22) Can I make some photo?s of you? (You can keep them if you like or to erase them to the end? I just like making it. I would like to keep them also but if it is a problem it is ok with me?.)
23) I want my woman not to wear make up. Is that ok with you?
24) Would you bring a very sort clussy skirt with you?
25) I love sort satin nightdress. You have one to bring?
26) I also love it like crazy when my woman have hairs to her pubic area. Is that ok?

I also have some fantasies I would like to try with you?.

1) Night nacked swimming and sex in the sea. (Only if the weather is ok and there are no other people around of course?)
2) I would like to play the game of rape with you. (Not pain or forced things. Just a very light roleplaying?)
3) I would like to play the game of rape but the way that you are rapping me?
4) The most times I had sex in one night till now in my life is three. Would you try please to make the three so many times that it would be life record for me?
5) I would like to have sex in doggy style with a woman that she wear only a pair of boots with high hills. You have maybe a pair?

I'm imagining him getting the booking, and being all excited. It's the shag of a lifetime, a memory he will treasure into his dotage, and all because he was so specific about what he wanted to make it perfect.......

Now look back at his first set of questions and read number 4 again :-)

 

My favourites:

9) Making sex to the shower is ok?

and:

4) The most times I had sex in one night till now in my life is three. Would you try please to make the three so many times that it would be life record for me?=

I read those in a Borat sort of voice too.

Yeah, I thought the anal surcharge was a nice touch lol. No discounts, even if you are spending millions. Rules is rules! And now I'm actually picturing 'make sex to the shower guy' as Borat in his mankini!

I have a very unusual fantasy which I would really love to make reality. I
will explain it but first want you to know it may not be possible in this
form. That said i am more than happy to discuss how we could amend it to
make it possible.

Ok my fantasy is for me to become panties, you would remove your panties
and put me on in there place. In my fantasy my face is against your pussy
and my arms and legs wrapped around your body you would wear clothing over
me. If possible you would walk about whilst wearing me, if you were able
to and willing to go out to a shop for example it would be a dream come
true. In an ideal world you could do so without even thinking as i imagine
you forgetting im there.

Obviously, there are some things which may or may not be feasible I would
appreciate any ideas or suggestions you have which could allow us to make
it reality?

I hope u will consider this and confirm im willing to incorporate it in to
a wonderful sexual encounter. If we can work it out im sure I will come
back for more as often as i can.

Hope to hear from you soon.






I just.... I don't even...

I had a guy asking me if he could 'get to know me,' this morning, because he was 'really impressed by my adultwork profile, and had the utmost respect for what I did.'

Ummm...I kindly responded advising him that AW isn't a dating site 

I had to laugh at that email that is too funny!!  i once recieved a email that read, " Hi i come see you back again,( id never seen him before!!!)  we are loving and kissing how is that with you,  this was sent from AW i did not reply....
Ruby x

Ooh, and I've just got one of my own!


"hi sexy, was thinking of booking but was wondering would you let a client try to get you pregnant? its a big fantasy of mine xx"

My reply......

"Really? You'd let me carry your child for 9 months, then raise it for the next 18 years? OK. My hourly rate is ?100. By my calculation, for the full 18 years 9 months, my fee will be ?16,440,000. If the bareback sex gives me HIV and I die before the child reaches 18, unfortunately no refunds can be given.
Please note, if a booking is more than ?500, I require a deposit beforehand. Please transfer ?8,220,000 in AW credits, and use the booking facility to let me know when you would like us to meet.

PS Anal is an extra ?50, and at my discretion"

I just had that same message today, less than 24 hours after I made my AW profile!

Haven't replied yet, can't think of anything to say back to him unless I copy paste your response lol.

I did it lol... the only things I changed were the numbers since we're different rates.  IF he replies, it might be an interesting response lol.

Best email ever came through today!


Hi

I could go to adultwork.com and get a BJ and Sex for ?50 from a slim sexy gal.
As you aren't slim, I will offer ?25. I will visit your place, you don't need to travel.
I guess you won't accept but who knows.

I am 32 with a slim body, average looks.

Tom