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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2599114 times)

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1215 on: 27 June 2011, 04:48:21 pm »
yay I got my own one now!!!

Quote
Subject: Hello nice girl who show a little her lovely breast
 
 

I'm going to travel to england with my biGirlfiend mid august. Do you do long booking as a sensual travel compagnion ie 24h, 3 days, 7 days? What are your price for plenty of fun?
We are looking for a good FFM3some whith a nice girl with plenty of kissing, licking and sucking. All expenses are for us.
Thank you nice girl
Kiss

 

Someone needs to tell him I am not a nice girl!

Kisses

Amber


OMG, I'm reading this thread, am up to July 2010, saw the post above...I received this EXACT message last week!!

Dionne

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1216 on: 27 June 2011, 04:54:05 pm »
yay I got my own one now!!!

Quote
Subject: Hello nice girl who show a little her lovely breast
 
 

I'm going to travel to england with my biGirlfiend mid august. Do you do long booking as a sensual travel compagnion ie 24h, 3 days, 7 days? What are your price for plenty of fun?
We are looking for a good FFM3some whith a nice girl with plenty of kissing, licking and sucking. All expenses are for us.
Thank you nice girl
Kiss

 

Someone needs to tell him I am not a nice girl!

Kisses

Amber


OMG, I'm reading this thread, am up to July 2010, saw the post above...I received this EXACT message last week!!

LMAO i have had this as well.... ::)

sara1980

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1217 on: 27 June 2011, 05:38:55 pm »

I had that one last year too. God, we're spoilt rotten aren't we lol!!

'Agency guy' - Yip, all new profiles but most of them have never logged in! I thought I was the 'chosen one'..... How disappointing that I'm not  :'( lol!!

Friday

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1218 on: 27 June 2011, 07:59:04 pm »

I had that one last year too. God, we're spoilt rotten aren't we lol!!

'Agency guy' - Yip, all new profiles but most of them have never logged in! I thought I was the 'chosen one'..... How disappointing that I'm not  :'( lol!!

I like how he goes to the effort of emailing us..texting us (yes the same message!) assumes we're never heard of AW but doesnt think to check if we're already on it!  ::)

Sweet-Pleasure

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1219 on: 28 June 2011, 01:04:08 pm »
Ok someone left the door on the weirdo cage open! got these 2 on AW today: 


Quote
n th process of making a new adult website it's going to be called thisCUNTry.com the site isn't up and running yet as still filming but we are now looking for women in the Newcastle area. If your intrested please email me pictures will get a quicker reply hope to hear from you soon.

groups of females and female couples welcome

Hope to hear from you soon

And

Quote
Basically I'm looking to get up to some naughty shenanigans with a woman who enjoy ten inches of uncut cock, anything goes, you name it I'll enjoy doing it.

whatev you say goes, your the boss so I think we should see it as mutual pleasure instead of business.

I hope to hear from you soon.

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1220 on: 28 June 2011, 01:28:01 pm »
Today's not a good day :(

"Hey bbe x I have 2 requests if you can do them I will pay the extra.

I would like to book you for a few hours and cum into a glass and when it gets full watch you drink it all but I would lime to have my dick in you.when you do.x

The other request I have an older gentelman friend and we like to tuck girls together he is 78 and I am 24 he wants you to.suck his cock and for him to be allowed to suck your tits and while he is doing that I want to fuck you xxx

If you CAn do.this we will pay the extra xxx

Thanks bbe x"

I don't do oral without, come in mouth or swallowing but yes I would like to drink a glass of spunk -_-


A COLD glass of spunk at that....*shudders*  :-X

Coty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1221 on: 28 June 2011, 10:31:49 pm »
Ok someone left the door on the weirdo cage open! got these 2 on AW today: 


Quote
n th process of making a new adult website it's going to be called thisCUNTry.com the site isn't up and running yet as still filming but we are now looking for women in the Newcastle area. If your intrested please email me pictures will get a quicker reply hope to hear from you soon.

groups of females and female couples welcome

Hope to hear from you soon

And

Quote
Basically I'm looking to get up to some naughty shenanigans with a woman who enjoy ten inches of uncut cock, anything goes, you name it I'll enjoy doing it.

whatev you say goes, your the boss so I think we should see it as mutual pleasure instead of business.

I hope to hear from you soon.

CUNTry...lmfao   Exceelent. Let's all dash to sign up for that one!

And bet you're also eager to go for some mutual pleasure with a 10inch uncut cock!  Spoilt for choice today Miss Bunny aren't you? :-)

Well here's mine from today.......not quite so bad...Not sure if I were to do it while the train was stationary at the terminal, or if I was to get on further down the line so i traveled with him...lol.....but seeing as I only work evening and nights this doubly peed me off!!!   

"I am in London Thursday Morning near Victoria I have a fetish to be given a quicky Blow job on a train weather it me in my seat or in toilets is this something you would consider meeting to do

Thanks xxx"

ana30

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1222 on: 29 June 2011, 12:22:18 am »
Quote
Withheld number: Hi.  I'd like to see you; do you offer bareback?
Jodie Bareback anal sex?
Withheld number: Yes please
Jodie Sure, but I HAVE to tell you that I have full blown AIDS
Withheld number: Pardon?
Jodie I'm legally obliged to  inform you, as the last seven clients who had anal bareback sex with me, all died of AIDS caught from me
Withheld number: Are you taking the piss?
Jodie You started it.

Hey Jodie, you gotta watch out with jokes like these. You never know of this guy is going to freak out and post reviews on the web "cautioning" other punters. with your err...."full blown aids condition??? 
Mornings were made for sleeping, wild sex and bacon.

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1223 on: 29 June 2011, 12:29:23 am »
Got one on cam tonight...

HIM - "do u meet?"
ME - "yes, I do offer an escort service"
HIM - " I bet u have a MASSIVE FANNY!!!!!!!!!!!"

ME - *chucks him out*

bless.

Friday

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1224 on: 29 June 2011, 12:35:41 am »
Got one on cam tonight...

HIM - "do u meet?"
ME - "yes, I do offer an escort service"
HIM - " I bet u have a MASSIVE FANNY!!!!!!!!!!!"

ME - *chucks him out*

bless.

charming! send me his username and I'll ban him lol

ana30

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1225 on: 29 June 2011, 12:38:40 am »
My best ones:

1.

- "hi, do you offer hypnosis as part of your massage?"
- err...don't think so...
- "I want to quit smoking and get a massage too"
- I'm afraid I can help you with the last part but not the first  ;D

2.
- "Hi, I want an erotic massage but I'm shy and have an issue with nudity so I don't want to remove my clothes"
- Sorry  but not going to happen.

3.
- "Hi, I just found your phone number on my husbands cell phone. What type of business is this?"
- Errr... It's... a... flower store!
- "A flower store!?"
- Er...yes.
- OH MY GOD! Can you please check who my husband is sending flowers too?"
- I'm sorry but our computer system is down so I'm afraid I can't help you.
Mornings were made for sleeping, wild sex and bacon.

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1226 on: 29 June 2011, 01:01:13 am »

- "Hi, I just found your phone number on my husbands cell phone. What type of business is this?"
- Errr... It's... a... flower store!
- "A flower store!?"
- Er...yes.
- OH MY GOD! Can you please check who my husband is sending flowers too?"
- I'm sorry but our computer system is down so I'm afraid I can't help you.

OMG!! Quick thinking, Batman!!  :o

River

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1227 on: 29 June 2011, 03:10:13 pm »
Quote
Withheld number: Hi.  I'd like to see you; do you offer bareback?
Me: Bareback anal sex?
Withheld number: Yes please
Me: Sure, but I HAVE to tell you that I have full blown AIDS
Withheld number: Pardon?
Me: I'm legally obliged to  inform you, as the last seven clients who had anal bareback sex with me, all died of AIDS caught from me
Withheld number: Are you taking the piss?
Me: You started it.

Hey River, you gotta watch out with jokes like these. You never know of this guy is going to freak out and post reviews on the web "cautioning" other punters. with your err...."full blown aids condition???

It's ok. I passed his details over to the CIA.
He's now on an extended stay in an Algerian interrogation centre.
« Last Edit: 23 January 2017, 04:34:51 pm by River »

River

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1228 on: 29 June 2011, 03:12:15 pm »
- "Hi, I just found your phone number on my husbands cell phone. What type of business is this?"
- Errr... It's... a... flower store!
- "A flower store!?"
- Er...yes.
- OH MY GOD! Can you please check who my husband is sending flowers too?"
- I'm sorry but our computer system is down so I'm afraid I can't help you.

Brill, I love that!

Dionne

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #1229 on: 29 June 2011, 03:49:27 pm »
2.
- "Hi, I want an erotic massage but I'm shy and have an issue with nudity so I don't want to remove my clothes"
- Sorry  but not going to happen.

Um, how would this work exactly??