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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2706011 times)

Rosesugar

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11775 on: 18 September 2017, 12:04:49 pm »
Hi was just wondering if I could get s nice slow cook(think he meant cock) sucking
My brown cook will be so happy to see you but I only have  30.00  for half hour sent as  text .
Couldnt be bothered to calll
I'm not giving his cook or cock whatever he calls it a shine for half price  :FF
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VoluptuousCurves

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11776 on: 18 September 2017, 06:22:43 pm »
Him: Postcode?
Me: It's a series of letters and numbers that helps the post office identify your house. Hope this helps!
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And me, I am not a mess, I am a wilderness, yes
The undiscovered continent for you to undress

Braziliana

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11777 on: 18 September 2017, 08:02:24 pm »
Quote from: VoluptuousCurves on 18 September 2017, 06:22:43 pm
Him: Postcode?
Me: It's a series of letters and numbers that helps the post office identify your house. Hope this helps!
Ya ha ha!
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sherbet_dab

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  • Posts: 150
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11778 on: 18 September 2017, 08:50:44 pm »
Quote from: VoluptuousCurves on 18 September 2017, 06:22:43 pm
Him: Postcode?
Me: It's a series of letters and numbers that helps the post office identify your house. Hope this helps!

 ;D ;D ;D
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Lucie268

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11779 on: 18 September 2017, 09:24:45 pm »
Quote from: VoluptuousCurves on 18 September 2017, 06:22:43 pm
Him: Postcode?
Me: It's a series of letters and numbers that helps the post office identify your house. Hope this helps!


lmao

Had someone call when my client was in the shower, so texted to say I was busy and to call back later. Then he texted to say 'Can I hear you to see if your good in the room x'

Now saved as Perv Creep in my phone.
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English natural beauty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11780 on: 19 September 2017, 01:04:14 am »
Quote from: Lucie268 on 18 September 2017, 09:24:45 pm

lmao

Had someone call when my client was in the shower, so texted to say I was busy and to call back later. Then he texted to say 'Can I hear you to see if your good in the room x'

Now saved as Perv Creep in my phone.

Tell him sorry i can't talk right now as im having a really massive poo and don't want you to hear it drop. Kill his erection.
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Sometimes I think that I could die from an overdose of satisfaction. -Salvador Dali

Lucie268

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11781 on: 19 September 2017, 09:52:18 pm »
Quote from: English natural beauty on 19 September 2017, 01:04:14 am
Tell him sorry i can't talk right now as im having a really massive poo and don't want you to hear it drop. Kill his erection.
;D unless he's into hardsports
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English natural beauty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11782 on: 20 September 2017, 12:22:00 am »
Quote from: Lucie268 on 19 September 2017, 09:52:18 pm
;D unless he's into hardsports

That's when you pin him down and shit on his face.  ;D
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Sometimes I think that I could die from an overdose of satisfaction. -Salvador Dali

SimplySinful

  • Guest
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11783 on: 20 September 2017, 07:14:02 pm »
I've completely had a bellyful today of guys who want really short notice appointments. Plastered over all my adverts is minimum one hour's notice because I've found from bitter experience that these extreme short notice' ers are way more like to: Not Show, Walk Out, Cancel, haggle, or otherwise timewaste.

All these guys 'driving thro' or on their way from X to Y, Read the first few lines of my ads, for fucks sake.

Last straw was a guy who rang up said he was 'just round the corner' and 'what's it all about then'. I very nearly lost my temper but just told him coldly he'd know about the notice had he bothered to read, and that he wasn't my type of client.
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Rosesugar

  • Guest
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11784 on: 20 September 2017, 08:47:18 pm »
Just had  this text
Hi can I fuck you for 20.00 ?
I can't call at the moment  just text me back a time after 8pm
No I will not text you back a time  I'm blocking you me thinks ..not wasting my minutes on him  :o
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SimplySinful

  • Guest
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11785 on: 21 September 2017, 09:57:35 am »
Received this gem this morning sent at stupid o'clock last night:

Hey how are you ? Fancy you and fancy seeing you tonight - I'm 29 and can accommodate and send photos x

What do you think I am, a fuck buddy  :FF
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Alison381

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11786 on: 21 September 2017, 05:07:16 pm »
Who else fancies this charmer ?  ;)

"Hello Alison I know your rates on your profile state you charge *my rate* but I'm hoping we can sort it out"
"Hello what do you suggest we need to "sort out" about my rates?"
"Well it should be cheaper for me as I'm not your usual punter"
"Right OK.... what do you think my "usual punter" is?"
"Some big fat dirty c*nt"
"OK so you think I should "sort out" my rate with you because you think I only see big fat ugly c*nts?"
"Yes, Id be doing you a favor as you wont get anyone better than me"
"What makes you better than my usual clientele?.... who I can assure you ARE NOT big fat ugly c*nts"
"I'm very young and fit.... Ill pay you *half my usual rate*"
"OK so you insult my clients and now you are insulting me by offering me half my usual rate and you think you can get a booking with me?"
"Yes.... give me your postcode and I will come over"

 :FF :FF
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?Some say that a woman that trades her body for money is a whore, if that is the case, then a woman that trades her body for flattery and kind words is just a whore that is not paid as well.?
― Carl R White

jo-jo

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11787 on: 21 September 2017, 07:41:48 pm »
Quote from: Alison381 on 21 September 2017, 05:07:16 pm
Who else fancies this charmer ?  ;)

"Hello Alison I know your rates on your profile state you charge *my rate* but I'm hoping we can sort it out"
"Hello what do you suggest we need to "sort out" about my rates?"
"Well it should be cheaper for me as I'm not your usual punter"
"Right OK.... what do you think my "usual punter" is?"
"Some big fat dirty c*nt"
"OK so you think I should "sort out" my rate with you because you think I only see big fat ugly c*nts?"
"Yes, Id be doing you a favor as you wont get anyone better than me"
"What makes you better than my usual clientele?.... who I can assure you ARE NOT big fat ugly c*nts"
"I'm very young and fit.... Ill pay you *half my usual rate*"
"OK so you insult my clients and now you are insulting me by offering me half my usual rate and you think you can get a booking with me?"
"Yes.... give me your postcode and I will come over"

 :FF :FF



 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D He should fuck right off
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Never criticize someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, they won't be able to hear you from that far away. Plus, you'll have their shoes.

Mya888

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11788 on: 21 September 2017, 07:51:30 pm »
So a guy asked me to drive an hour for an hour booking for 9pm when it's pouring with rain. I said no, top far away to drive in this weather.
His reply: the weather isn't that bad and it's only a 50 min drive.
Couldnt be even bothered to reply. Like he thinks he can dictate how far and when I want to travel  :FF
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Lucie268

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #11789 on: 21 September 2017, 11:05:22 pm »
Had someone on AW ask if I was planning to tour Manchester, I said no. Then said he'd 'make it worth my while' by booking two hours for an outcall. Right soooooo... you want me to drive four hours for a two hour booking?

Like, if I want to tour Manchester I will but not for *you*, client who I've never met before with 0 feedback.
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