I'm sure this one has been done, but those who act like they know you- texting Hello, how are you? Or just texting 'Hi'.
Honestly do they think this is a way to endear us, if you're going to text just fucking ask me whatever you need to know!

Sometimes, I reply Who is this? (just for kicks!) to see if maybe he will then enter into a sensible conversation. but NO. 'You get I saw you on AW' or 'I like your profile'

YES AND?

Even if they do intend on booking they fail my test because this kind of nonsense irritates me so much. Of course, if I say Can you call to make a booking they invariably don't.

Grrrr

I text back that they don't need to chat me up, I'm a prostitute we can miss that bit out.

Lol luv the above ^

So after 25min of sorting out when and where and what sort of booking he's looking for, he asks how old I am (clearly stated in my profile) turns out he's looking for someone much younger. I was polite and refered him elsewhere but Grrrr!

Email just now: Any this afternoon for an incall?

Any what? Oh btw it was 5.33 when you sent that, that's evening already......

Sent at 4.42am:

Hi how you? Looking for a quick blow job and to lick some juicy pussy x

So sad I missed it.

I don't get too many oddballs - either I don't advertise very well, or my site is incredibly off-putting, lol - could easily be both! Usually I just get 3-4 genuine queries a week which turn into actual bookings, plus a couple of nonsense emails/texts/calls that I just ignore so well that they don't even register on me brain.

But one guy that I can remember recently was a little odd. He sent me loooong emails about himself, his circumstances, his reason for wanting to punt for the first time, his wife... etc. He did ask in the first email about a specific time and date for a booking, so I accepted that and ignored the rest (honestly - the Punter's Etiquette Book should include something about how over-explaining your reasons for wanting to book an escort to the poor girl just makes her feel more uneasy! And it's completely unnecessary since it's really rather obvious why he wants to do it anyway). His emails (only 3 or 4 of them, not like 2,000 texts or anything) continued and he explained at length to me the feelings he was experiencing; first excitement, then concern, then guilt! 'Twas a regular soap opera. He ended up wanting to cancel the second half (bedroom half) of the booking and only take me for lunch, at half normal rate.

I'm sure others'll think I'm weird for this but I've said it before and it's true for me, I don't really like going out and 'dating' clients for hours, for various reasons. So I told him one of the reasons, which was that I didn't have time for lunch out that day, and declined the booking, and he never did reply. I'm not annoyed but am definitely a bit curious about it all! Either he was spinning a loooong complicated yarn, or he was just very open and a little vulnerable? Either way, definitely best he doesn't see me as I don't offer a Full Emotional Support For Everything That's Going Wrong In Your Life package! A sympathetic ear, yes, but honestly, I'm not qualified to treat anything serious and who's going to listen to advice from a WG sitting around in her pants?! Even though my advice is usually EXCELLENT, lol.

I dont suppose his name was BGM2010 was it? xxx

Text received last night

"Hi will you offer anal bareback I am clean and I will not come in you"

 

(Just to add I don't offer either!)

And a man of few words just text me: "yo"

Being asked what I *don't* do annoys me. I mean, sure, there's bareback and anal or whatever relatively common things one doesn't do. But you can rattle all of these off and they'll then ask about yet another thing you don't do. "I don't do bareback, I don't take facials, I can't deep throat, and I am not submissive." "Do you do strap-on?" WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU ASK THAT TO BEGIN WITH?