Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships! (Read 2599921 times)

Ilana · « **Reply #8985 on:** 26 March 2016, 01:40:44 pm »

him: How do I go about seeing you for 30 minutes this weekend ? (I don?t offer 30 min bookings) I?ll book for longer the second visit but prefer to just see you for half n hour the first time, just to we get to know each other

Please bring a bag of peanuts to throw at me while you observe me in my natural habitat, idly sucking on dildos, grinding on tree branches and meowing occasionally, like a cat in heat.

I enjoy having sex with strangers ? the prospect of being asked by a punter if I?m a student, what is my favourite colour is and where I come from, makes my skin crawl.

Quote

be able to come to an arrangement as he would be seeing me every month to 6 weeks and i was a little more expensive than the last lady

You can tell him that since the 70's when he met his last lady, the prices went up (and flared jeans are no longer popular, either.)

KittenCandy · « **Reply #8986 on:** 26 March 2016, 02:02:33 pm »

Quote from: Shewolf on 26 March 2016, 12:48:08 pm

Tell him you actually charge more for clients over 65 to go towards your therapy fees as it can be fairly traumatic and so you asking him for the usual fee is actually a discounted rate. Then say 'u avin it or wha mate?'

That'll get rid of him, no need to block.

lol. love it

good one

Lushblossom · « **Reply #8987 on:** 26 March 2016, 03:27:12 pm »

Many over 65's are rolling in it - what planet is he on!

It is only one third of current day pensioners that can't make ends meet the rest are the baby boomers who have had a charmed life.

TrashAzn · « **Reply #8988 on:** 28 March 2016, 05:35:28 pm »

Quote from: littleminxjennifer on 26 March 2016, 12:39:04 pm

old guy has tried to call a few times and left voicemails. finally got through to me yesterday.

i explained my phone was only ever on while i was working and that i didn't take much work as i wanted to keep everything very low key and discreet.

his enquiry was all fine and he seemed really pleasant then BAM... and of course i'm a pensioner and my wife isn't interested in sex any longer, and the lady i used to see has retired.

he continues with more dull, unnecessary gubbins i really don't need to know befire heading into a story of how the last lady would have a nice chat and a cuppa with him after they'd finished, and that he was a pension (yeah, heard you first time mate) so would we be able to come to an arrangement as he would be seeing me every month to 6 weeks and i was a little more expensive than the last lady

think my diary will be full now when he calls. i hate hagglers

Quickest way for a potential client to make me not like them and block them is to haggle. The worst for me are the ones like "Oh what if I pay you this much and buy you a take away and a drink? We can hang out it'll be easy money for you still" They don't seem to understand I'm not doing this for fun or to make friends this is a business and the price I set is one I feel makes it worth it to sleep with a stranger who is likely 30 odd years older than me.

BibiofLeeds · « **Reply #8989 on:** 29 March 2016, 03:38:59 pm »

Had emails from an apparent 21 year old virgin over the weekend..a couple of red flags to be honest.Firstly he only wanted a 30 min appointment as he reckons he always comes quick from wanking..he didn't seem to grasp that fanny and actually interacting with a woman is going to be quite different to him cracking one off at the wrist.He also asked if he would need to use condoms..er yes of course.
Said he would confirm a 5pm appointment at lunchtime but rang me at 3:30pm claiming he was busy at lunchtime..he sounded alot younger and seemed very nonchalent.Said he would call tomorrow instead if he remembered at which point I said 'If you remember?You are wanting to book someone to lose your virginity to yet you are saying if you remember to confirm..'I don't think I'll be meeting up with him.

Nia Hope · « **Reply #8990 on:** 29 March 2016, 03:57:41 pm »

Email yesterday,
Him "See you do prostate massage, how you do this?"
Me "Yes, I massage your prostate with my finger"
Him "Where is it?"

Nia Hope · « **Reply #8991 on:** 29 March 2016, 04:30:47 pm »

Quote from: K47 on 25 March 2016, 08:41:29 pm

Guy calls, sounds alright on the phone except for calling me 'darling' which I normally take as a bad sign, but done nothing today so thought I'd give him a chance, arranged the time etc, sent him my postcode. Then he text

him: I dont want massage just sex
me: ? i don't do massage
him: owo?
me: obviously you haven't read my profile at all so please don't contact me again
him: i'm just double checking
him: so?
me: no
him: ok fuck off

nice! I knew the 'darling' was a warning sign. I swear every guy I've ever had that has called me darling, sweetheart, babe or whatever has been an arsehole

I 100% agree! I stop listening the second they call me any of these

Fabulassie · « **Reply #8992 on:** 29 March 2016, 05:08:47 pm »

Quote from: Nia Hope on 29 March 2016, 03:57:41 pm

Email yesterday,
Him "See you do prostate massage, how you do this?"
Me "Yes, I massage your prostate with my finger"
Him "Where is it?"

This made me laugh.

Nia Hope · « **Reply #8993 on:** 29 March 2016, 05:31:10 pm »

Quote from: Fabulassie on 29 March 2016, 05:08:47 pm

Quote from: Nia Hope on 29 March 2016, 03:57:41 pm
Email yesterday,
Him "See you do prostate massage, how you do this?"
Me "Yes, I massage your prostate with my finger"
Him "Where is it?"

This made me laugh.

I had a client years ago offer to massage my prostate! He genuinely didn't know that females don't have them!

BibiofLeeds · « **Reply #8994 on:** 29 March 2016, 07:43:46 pm »

FFS!What a day of bellends!Just had a guy ring and ask for a 30 min he then asked if he could transfer the money into my account instead of paying cash because he couldn't be arsed going to a cashpoint..as fecking if I am going to trust a stranger with a)My bank details and b)to put the money in before his appointment in 20 mins time!

Kendall · « **Reply #8995 on:** 29 March 2016, 08:36:49 pm »

Him: can I book for 15 mins at 645? do you do owo?
Me: yup *gives address*

5 minutes before the appointment he txts me "see you at 645 can I decide on which or both girls when I get there? I hope neither of you are sensitive haha

Me: there's only me here
Him: I'm confused which one is your adultwork profile?
Me: forget *blocks*

Shewolf · « **Reply #8996 on:** 29 March 2016, 10:08:33 pm »

Quote from: Nia Hope on 29 March 2016, 05:31:10 pm

Quote from: Fabulassie on 29 March 2016, 05:08:47 pm
Quote from: Nia Hope on 29 March 2016, 03:57:41 pm
Email yesterday,
Him "See you do prostate massage, how you do this?"
Me "Yes, I massage your prostate with my finger"
Him "Where is it?"

This made me laugh.
I had a client years ago offer to massage my prostate! He genuinely didn't know that females don't have them!

Should have told him 'up yer nose'

katrina · « **Reply #8997 on:** 29 March 2016, 10:13:45 pm »

Had a text off a real charmer: "Whats your name"

BibiofLeeds · « **Reply #8998 on:** 29 March 2016, 10:48:39 pm »

Quote from: katrina on 29 March 2016, 10:13:45 pm

Had a text off a real charmer: "Whats your name"

I sometimes reply with Gertrude if I'm feeling sarcastic.

katrina · « **Reply #8999 on:** 29 March 2016, 11:00:26 pm »

Quote from: BibiofLeeds on 29 March 2016, 10:48:39 pm

Quote from: katrina on 29 March 2016, 10:13:45 pm
Had a text off a real charmer: "Whats your name"
I sometimes reply with Gertrude if I'm feeling sarcastic.

LOL I'll have to remember that next time!

Anyway apparently he wanted an overnight with someone who he didn't even have a name for, then when I said I didn't do them he wanted 2 hours *yawn*

See also the main SAAFE.info site for more Support And Advice For Escorts

Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships! (Read 2599921 times)

Ilana

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

KittenCandy

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

Lushblossom

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

TrashAzn

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

BibiofLeeds

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

Nia Hope

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

Nia Hope

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

Fabulassie

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

Nia Hope

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

BibiofLeeds

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

Kendall

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

Shewolf

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

katrina

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

BibiofLeeds

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!

katrina

Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!