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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2601601 times)

BibiofLeeds

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8940 on: 16 March 2016, 10:58:06 pm »
Via text:Hiya I saw you on twitter.
Me:Ok
Him:What's your name?
Me:Um its on my twitter and you must have gone onto my website to get my number.
Him:Sorry babe was too busy looking at ur crackin tits xx

Just An Escort

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8941 on: 17 March 2016, 09:54:22 am »
I just can't be bothered to read all of this rubbish (received at 3am on AW):


Dear (my name),

This is just a quick note to introduce myself and to ask a few questions about you and your services.

I'm new to the AW site - and escorting in general, hence my lack of feedback. I've never visited an escort before and after looking at your profile, I think you might be just what I'm looking for.

Firstly, I'm 29 years old and still a virgin. This will be my first time - literally. I have no idea how long I should book for, do you have any ideas? I'd like my first time to be special, at least...

I should probably say at this point that I've also never kissed a woman before, let alone french kissed. Is that something you could teach me? It sounds like so much fun, but as I said above, I don't want to disappoint you.

Second, can we have a bath or shower together? I quite like the idea of having a shower or sharing a bath before going back to the bedroom to make love. I really haven't a clue about "dom" or "sub" things, but I think for me, just lots of hugs and kisses, followed by sensual lovemaking would be just the ticket! I'm the "romantic" type, so candes, roses, silk sheets - lights off, deep kissing, missionary position, and no sexy makeup, no special lingerie or music. You get the idea ;) I may be a virgin, but at least I have some imagination! Is that your sort of thing too?

Also, are you still shaved down south? I actually tend to prefer the natural look...it's just more feminine and primal to me. If shaved, however, may I ask why? I notice more and more women are doing this and it puzzles me. Really, it does.

Lastly, I'm white (caucasian). Are you all right meeting with someone of my ethnicity? I'm aware some people have preferences and such.

If you have any rules or limits that I don't know about, please let me know.

I look forward to hearing from you, and finding out what it feels like to be inside you!


Hannaah

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8942 on: 17 March 2016, 11:32:39 am »
Had someone I've seen once before ask when I'm next available and told him I don't know yet as currently not working due to a cold.

"Oh I don't mind, can I see you still?"

What makes them think that WE don't mind?!

KittenCandy

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8943 on: 17 March 2016, 02:35:58 pm »
Had someone I've seen once before ask when I'm next available and told him I don't know yet as currently not working due to a cold.

"Oh I don't mind, can I see you still?"

What makes them think that WE don't mind?!
cuz we are money hungry  ::)

Shewolf

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8944 on: 17 March 2016, 05:11:21 pm »
I just can't be bothered to read all of this rubbish (received at 3am on AW):


Dear (my name),

This is just a quick note to introduce myself and to ask a few questions about you and your services.

I'm new to the AW site - and escorting in general, hence my lack of feedback. I've never visited an escort before and after looking at your profile, I think you might be just what I'm looking for.

Firstly, I'm 29 years old and still a virgin. This will be my first time - literally. I have no idea how long I should book for, do you have any ideas? I'd like my first time to be special, at least...

I should probably say at this point that I've also never kissed a woman before, let alone french kissed. Is that something you could teach me? It sounds like so much fun, but as I said above, I don't want to disappoint you.

Second, can we have a bath or shower together? I quite like the idea of having a shower or sharing a bath before going back to the bedroom to make love. I really haven't a clue about "dom" or "sub" things, but I think for me, just lots of hugs and kisses, followed by sensual lovemaking would be just the ticket! I'm the "romantic" type, so candes, roses, silk sheets - lights off, deep kissing, missionary position, and no sexy makeup, no special lingerie or music. You get the idea ;) I may be a virgin, but at least I have some imagination! Is that your sort of thing too?

Also, are you still shaved down south? I actually tend to prefer the natural look...it's just more feminine and primal to me. If shaved, however, may I ask why? I notice more and more women are doing this and it puzzles me. Really, it does.

Lastly, I'm white (caucasian). Are you all right meeting with someone of my ethnicity? I'm aware some people have preferences and such.

If you have any rules or limits that I don't know about, please let me know.

I look forward to hearing from you, and finding out what it feels like to be inside you!

Do you think he'll have his list on the bedside table?

KittenCandy

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8945 on: 17 March 2016, 05:46:06 pm »
I just can't be bothered to read all of this rubbish (received at 3am on AW):


Dear (my name),

This is just a quick note to introduce myself and to ask a few questions about you and your services.

I'm new to the AW site - and escorting in general, hence my lack of feedback. I've never visited an escort before and after looking at your profile, I think you might be just what I'm looking for.

Firstly, I'm 29 years old and still a virgin. This will be my first time - literally. I have no idea how long I should book for, do you have any ideas? I'd like my first time to be special, at least...

I should probably say at this point that I've also never kissed a woman before, let alone french kissed. Is that something you could teach me? It sounds like so much fun, but as I said above, I don't want to disappoint you.

Second, can we have a bath or shower together? I quite like the idea of having a shower or sharing a bath before going back to the bedroom to make love. I really haven't a clue about "dom" or "sub" things, but I think for me, just lots of hugs and kisses, followed by sensual lovemaking would be just the ticket! I'm the "romantic" type, so candes, roses, silk sheets - lights off, deep kissing, missionary position, and no sexy makeup, no special lingerie or music. You get the idea ;) I may be a virgin, but at least I have some imagination! Is that your sort of thing too?

Also, are you still shaved down south? I actually tend to prefer the natural look...it's just more feminine and primal to me. If shaved, however, may I ask why? I notice more and more women are doing this and it puzzles me. Really, it does.

Lastly, I'm white (caucasian). Are you all right meeting with someone of my ethnicity? I'm aware some people have preferences and such.

If you have any rules or limits that I don't know about, please let me know.

I look forward to hearing from you, and finding out what it feels like to be inside you!

poor thing. It's not called making love if you are not in love. sounds odd saying I made love to a hooker :-X What's Love got to do with it got to do with it. Oh what's love got to do with it. Reminds me of someone who contacted me requesting that we dim the lights and slowly undress whilst kissing to slow sensual music. but silk sheets, roses and candles ;D ahhhhahahahah There is only so much I can lie and act. No, just No. Stop it!

Hadley

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8946 on: 17 March 2016, 05:47:00 pm »
Oh JAE that's hilarious (sorry didn't quote, am on ancient crappy phone.)

I take it you took his flower on cream silk sheets with rose petals strewn all about as requested?

 ;D

H xx
"Why do people say "grow some balls"? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding."

-Betty White

Hadley

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8947 on: 17 March 2016, 06:00:31 pm »
Mr. Fun (yes really.)"Mr Fun here. How are you today? Weekend coming!!"

Me:Hi, please note this is my booking line, not a chat line, therefore I respond to serious and genuine bookings only. In this connection are you looking to meet tonight? Kisses Hadley

No response. Quelle surprise.

Tonight, a week later (17.03) Mr. Fun. "So, having a Guiness tonight?"

No response from me obviously. Mr. Fun? Mr. Fuckwit more like :FF
« Last Edit: 17 March 2016, 06:02:20 pm by Hadley »
"Why do people say "grow some balls"? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding."

-Betty White

Jezabel

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8948 on: 17 March 2016, 06:17:49 pm »
Just received this email:

how much for bareback

How dare he just assume stupid little f***er. Getting in a bad mood now...

Riverprice

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8949 on: 17 March 2016, 06:25:29 pm »
12:30am: Do you do hardsports?

10 minutes later  :)

You watching the football tonight?


.....le sigh. ...
xxxxxx

Jezabel

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8950 on: 17 March 2016, 06:37:49 pm »
.....le sigh. ...

Le Sigh......love it, done a few of those today I can tell you......

OFFS

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8951 on: 17 March 2016, 10:35:30 pm »
I get text tennis asking for me do an outcall to a lorry at 1am and politely say no thanks. Get a rude reply which I ignore, and then at 1am the following comes in via text

.....just as I though here now sure I carnt get u out 2 come and set on my of bed face and tell me u love me

I politely replied in the morning, once again no thanks, but I can point you towards free English classes to improve your grammar and spelling and to possibly search online for etiquette when booking an escort. 




Guiltypleasure

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8952 on: 18 March 2016, 02:01:53 pm »
Well this one is a new one to me!

Hi
I am looking for a sexy girl to pay to help me do my fantasy
I love to do a nude run xx

After I said I wouldn't do this:

OK

Shame I love to fuck you and have a good hand job then short run xx

A nude run?? What does that mean? He wants you to run in the nude? Where? Round a hotel room? Hotel car park? Up his street?

I'll hazard a guess and say that the only place Just An Escort will be doing a nude run is in his fantasising little mind... Along with whoever else was lucky enough to receive that copy n paste masterpiece lol!
excellent I can do a nearly nude NUN ! and just wear my Judy garland head thing or a Nude Nun Run ( on spot)  laughing so much xxx

Hannaah

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8953 on: 18 March 2016, 03:19:29 pm »
First day back after constant illnessess the last few weeks and already want to bang my head against a wall.

1: 2.44pm Hi are you available at 3.30?

I answered before I noticed he'd then called at 2. 47, 2.48, 2.49, 2.51.

Told him I was available from 4pm.

2.52- What about in the next 12-13 minutes? (So...specific.)
2.57- Okay.
2.57. 4pm is fine.
2.58. Text back to confirm and text me your address.
3.07. ?

2: Want to see you.

Well...make a booking like a normal person then?

3: Do you do deepthroat, CIM, swallow in 15 minutes?
- No I only do deepthroat in an hour or longer bookings. The rest is fine.
-ok basically all i'm looking for is a suck and i want to cum down your throat while your sucking will you do that?

...Did I not just say that?!

Hannaah

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #8954 on: 18 March 2016, 05:56:26 pm »
Hi there,

I am interested in overnight and can pay around ?300 as I have to travel from London ,If that's possible please let me know. Also this will be at you place if possible if not then we can look for a hotel near you.

Perhaps we could do this overnight when you are least busy ?

Can you leave your number so we have a chat about this please. Alternatively can you please send me a message through WhatsApp please. My number is *** or message me through Kik, my id is ***

Look forward to hearing from you.

Kind regards


So...I don 't do overnights or outcall/hotels, would certainly  never let a client stay over and he wants the whole time for a whopping 300 and if I were to do this why on earth mention being less busy  when doing it?!

Oh and of course  he isn't even near my required age minimum to see me.  ::)