A guy who considers himself as my regular (I saw him twice in one year ffs!) sends me a text. A veeeeryyy loooong text.

The way it goes is more or less: he may be in my area tonight or tomorrow evening, can't tell yet for sure, but suppose he is in my area would I be available for a booking say somewhere between 4pm and 10pm. It'll be really short notice and not to worry he remembers where I live so if I could just let him know if I'm available.

Errrr. Available precisely  WHEN, you moron?

They do make you laugh don't they, does he really expect you to hang around in your stockings and suspenders half the afternoon and ALL your evening not only once but twice!! For fuck sake what planet are these type of guys on?!!


The super long texts really grate on me, we really don't need to know their whole schedule for the day/week, all we need is a day/time/duration of booking, its really quite simple, I don't understand why they behave like this!!

When they call and you can hear their mates in the background...guaranteed instant hang up!

Quote from: Nova on 04 February 2016, 11:34:21 am

"Hi Nova, I would be interested to get in touch but couldn't find a phone number. Could you let me know how to get in touch
thx "

Um... there's this thing called email. In fact... YOU'RE USING IT RIGHT NOW!

I get that SO much. Or them just mailing me their phone number. Seems some can't comprehend that we use email as a primary  means of communication.

Reminds me of that old pretentious f*** who emailed me last year. I replied to his first very friendly email and then I got this "if you want my booking then call me"
Hahahaha 

from 3am until 4am I have 10 missed calls from one guy. Then a text saying '130 if you available'.  Great. Thanks... 

My friend just sent me a screen shot of a text she just received.......

Hi I'm Peter could you sell me to a Chinese takeaway and keep the money you get for me please?

WTF? Lol just when you think you've heard it all.

I just got a variant of this message:

"Hi silly question but could you sell me to a Chinese takeaway please?"

Yes it is a silly question!

Had a a couple of emails from a guy who talks about how it's his sons birthday coming up and he'd like to hire an escort to take his virginity he'll be 25 and hasn't been with a girl yet blah blah asks me if I can do it. I'm sort of entertaining the idea even if it's odd he seems willing to pay me for an hour to go take his sons virginity and it's not like it's the first virgin client I've had. Anyway I try to get him to tell his son to call me and he insists he wants it to be a surprise etc because if he knows he'll back out of it or something so I ask him to call me to talk about details as a phone confirmation.

Anyways long story short the phone conversation is where things get really weird and he starts asking if I'd charge extra for him to watch me take his sons virginity then comes up with "How much for both of us at the same time?" At this point I wondered why I even entertained the idea in the first place. Was probably fapping on the other end of the phone.

Long story cut short, basically exchanged a couple of texts with a potential 'client' who 'liked my profile, was very interested in passionate kissing, owo, and wanted to book'.  I asked him to be more specific with day and time as I don't live at the place where I do incalls so only do evenings and weekends if booked in advance. He replied with 'not sure hoping to clear up an hour for some 'ME' time at the weekend, and never even looked to see if you were available' 

Just got a request for a two hour 'rewarding' car meet. Now. at 1am.

Two hour car meet.

Two. hour. car. meet.

Firstly I don't even offer car meets.  And secondly, how on earth would one fill ~two hours~ in a car? I can't think of anything less rewarding than being squashed into somebody's Nissan Micra for two sodding hours at silly o'clock in the morning.

30 mins is pretty much the only duration I will do in that setting. Dude probably doesn't know how cramped up he'd be.