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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2600158 times)

Nia Hope

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5280 on: 12 March 2014, 05:44:20 pm »
Had an email from a guy a few times over the past 3 years, suspect the email has done the rounds!

Hi, I am 19 and haven't had much experience with girls, I would like you to wank me till I'm hard and let me know if my cock is of above or below average size, I can send you a picture of it hard if you give me your personal email or we could skype? And you can let me know that way, thanks x

Gotta admire them for trying I think ! X
If something is not perceived it doesn't exist.

Pink~Princess

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5281 on: 12 March 2014, 05:52:10 pm »
I am in Glasgow and have had this email before or something very similar so I suspect he is doing the rounds x

Nia Hope

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5282 on: 12 March 2014, 06:07:55 pm »
Thought so, think another one maybe a lot of girls have had goes something like this,

Hi, have a movie of my ex boyfriend sucking his own cock! Want to put it all over the internet , will you put it on your profile?

I said no!

Got same email another time but on this occasion claiming to be from a guy who wanted the same movie put out on the internet, weird x
If something is not perceived it doesn't exist.

amy

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5283 on: 12 March 2014, 06:16:10 pm »
I have thought its a silly question too, as if I would work from a hotel that I couldn't work from BUT plenty girls don't do their homework and find themselves in key carded hotels etc so maybe due to a previous bad experience these clients just want clarification that they wont run into any problems when they enter the hotel xx

I know what you mean, but if they want to know if it's keycarded/where the lifts are/if there's parking or whatever I'd rather they just asked the specific question - it's a bit like being asked for 'details' and I think it's the laziness of it that irritates me. The number of times I've been asked that question in London in six years of working there is less than the number of times I get asked in a single day in places like Ireland and when I pick up the phone to have 'hotel or 'partment?' grunted at me now I just hang up.

Had an email from a guy a few times over the past 3 years, suspect the email has done the rounds!

Hi, I am 19 and haven't had much experience with girls, I would like you to wank me till I'm hard and let me know if my cock is of above or below average size, I can send you a picture of it hard if you give me your personal email or we could skype? And you can let me know that way, thanks x


I've had that one at least three times and I think mostof us have got it at least once - he's right up there with that dim twat who's looking for a girlfriend and will 'let' you keep working because he's such a great guy and the one who claims he's a masseuse and in a gesture of goodwill will let you get nekkid and lie there whilst he gropes and mauls you about without charging you a penny. Form an orderly queue, folks  ;D.

Nia Hope

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5284 on: 12 March 2014, 06:22:16 pm »
Same as 'male escorts' emailing to do you a huge favour of shared content, x
If something is not perceived it doesn't exist.

Pink~Princess

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5285 on: 12 March 2014, 06:39:39 pm »
I had a guy email me the other day wanting to cam with me in the mornings even although I am not a cammer  ::) So he basically wants free se in the mornings lol, what a tool!! x

Nia Hope

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5286 on: 12 March 2014, 06:53:09 pm »
Hi, can I be your slave for the day? I will let you have sex with me whenever you want , x

This translates as, hi can I spend the day with you and fuck you for free!
If something is not perceived it doesn't exist.

Hannaah

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5287 on: 12 March 2014, 08:53:27 pm »
"Hi I'm 27 looking for sex. ideally I'd like to find a regular fuck buddy or even girlfriend as I really enjoy sex. I earn 34k and have around 40k in savings so we could have lots of fun. x"

Hahahahahahaha.

Well that 40k in savings could get you to be his girlfriend (experience) for a while at least! ;) Bless his cotton socks, he must think he's on Match

Haha! I was tempted to email back and tell him I'm not a dating site, but then decided why bother. It did give me a good giggle at 6.30am as I was struggling to open my eyes, put me in a good mood right away :D

amy

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5288 on: 12 March 2014, 09:03:45 pm »
"Hi I'm 27 looking for sex. ideally I'd like to find a regular fuck buddy or even girlfriend as I really enjoy sex. I earn 34k and have around 40k in savings so we could have lots of fun. x"

Translation: I still live with my mum.

Amethyst

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5289 on: 13 March 2014, 01:24:30 pm »
This guy made me laugh!

Him: Hi may I ask a few questions on your services please?
Me: ?
Him: What's the required age?
Me: 18
Him: I'm 16 legal age I'll pay full price for a bj?
Me: Great, 10pc discount with a valid student card.
Him: So will you give me a bj? How much?
Me: No.
Him: You said great?
Me: I also said 18+
Him: I'll pay full price up to you..?
Me: Come back in 2 years.
Him: Sweet

 ::)

Shall I pencil him in my diary in advance :D
« Last Edit: 13 March 2014, 01:37:49 pm by Amethyst »

chloe94

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5290 on: 13 March 2014, 05:04:09 pm »
a while back a local man emailed asking for watersports, I advertise nothing kinky but he said he'd still like to see me so maybe he just thought 'if you don't ask you don't get'.. so I thought 'hm he can't be too bad'

he emailed me again today
"Could i cum over your tits (only) for ?30?
Should be all over in a matter of minutes! -lol
x"


replied saying I'm not a sweet shop, my fee is for my time.. etc lol. doing hair and makeup, picking lingerie and outfit and travelling for just ?30, it's much more effort on my part than just turning up for a few mins, letting a guy cum on me and leaving! :P haha oh well. he was kind of polite but this is his 2nd silly request so I was a bit short in my reply.

ClaireJayne

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5291 on: 13 March 2014, 07:51:07 pm »
Had this through the AW email system:  number? that's all nothing else so I responded with 'I am not Count Von Count from the muppets, you want a number, here's one 'Five'

He got under my skin....

Pink~Princess

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5292 on: 13 March 2014, 09:08:22 pm »
a while back a local man emailed asking for watersports, I advertise nothing kinky but he said he'd still like to see me so maybe he just thought 'if you don't ask you don't get'.. so I thought 'hm he can't be too bad'

he emailed me again today
"Could i cum over your tits (only) for ?30?
Should be all over in a matter of minutes! -lol
x"


replied saying I'm not a sweet shop, my fee is for my time.. etc lol. doing hair and makeup, picking lingerie and outfit and travelling for just ?30, it's much more effort on my part than just turning up for a few mins, letting a guy cum on me and leaving! :P haha oh well. he was kind of polite but this is his 2nd silly request so I was a bit short in my reply.

That's another reason why my half hour rate is on the high end as I still make the same amount of effort for a half hour client as I do for an hour client with being freshly showered, hair & make-up, lingerie, setting up my work space etc etc etc not to mention the fact that regardless of time, I am still offering a full service and for that I charge a minimum ?100 x

Pink~Princess

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5293 on: 13 March 2014, 09:10:06 pm »
Had this through the AW email system:  number? that's all nothing else so I responded with 'I am not Count Von Count from the muppets, you want a number, here's one 'Five'

He got under my skin....

I know you do just think to yourself what the hell is this person going to be like in person if he cant even be bothered to be polite in an email........NO THANK YOU!! xx

KimberlyC

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #5294 on: 14 March 2014, 10:54:37 am »
This clown texted me all day long:

Hi how are you

Hello. I am fine. How are you? :)

I am fine bby Ulook sexy nce body n?e breasts nce ass.

Reply

Can I ask U smethn?

Ru there

Hello ru there

Hi how are you?

Ru there

Hi how are you?ru there

Ru there hello

Me: Hello?

How are you

Reply

Me: I'm fine. :)

Cn I ask U smethn

Me: You just did, in a barely comprehensible way.

Cn I as U smethn plz

Me: Apparently not. Most people just ask the question.

Well I ask U a question cn I ask U or not

CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING PLEASE

Hello can I ask U smethn yes or no

Me: No. You have had your chance and all you've done is squandered it on asking the question "can I ask you a question?"

Excuse me wht is this huh if U do nt knw why I am join to ask U how cn I teach U how to do it with me.

Hi how are you

Ru there