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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2664727 times)

UrbaneAspects

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #375 on: 20 April 2010, 07:28:03 pm »
Quote from: Violette on 20 April 2010, 04:00:53 pm
Got this gem at 3 in the morning.
"Hi v was wondering wud u fancy an hr for 100?"
Awwww Bless!

People try that crap with me all the time....$100? What is this, 1980?
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LilyWhite107

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #376 on: 20 April 2010, 08:29:13 pm »
I got a text today including choice phrases such as "me good looking" and "you won't be disappointed".

Disappointment doesn't come in to it as long as you can pay me. Haha.
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cindy

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #377 on: 20 April 2010, 11:43:26 pm »
Quote from: American Joey on 20 April 2010, 07:28:03 pm
Quote from: Violette on 20 April 2010, 04:00:53 pm
Got this gem at 3 in the morning.
"Hi v was wondering wud u fancy an hr for 100?"
Awwww Bless!

People try that crap with me all the time....$100? What is this, 1980?

Hmmmm... maybe he meant if she gave him 100 he would quit texting and let her have an hours sleep. ;D
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find out exactly how and why a man hoping to escort women for a living has more chance of plaiting fog, and better earning prospects on Jobseekers Allowance.

Violette

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #378 on: 21 April 2010, 07:15:37 am »
Phone was on silent. Got the same text again this morning, only the more generic version, no v this time.
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EmilyJones

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #379 on: 21 April 2010, 08:56:14 am »
Quote from: cindy on 20 April 2010, 11:43:26 pm
Hmmmm... maybe he meant if she gave him 100 he would quit texting and let her have an hours sleep. ;D

ROFL!

I want that text now so I can reply, "Wow yes plz 100 sounds great! Do u offer anal & deepthroat? Should I bring my own strapon?"
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pandora

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #380 on: 21 April 2010, 06:00:57 pm »
Quote from: Anika Mae on 13 April 2010, 12:25:54 am
I've done plenty of CBT and I haven't found the general stuff to be timewaster fodder, so I wouldn't think one particular subset of it would be so different, but it is. If they want them squeezed and poked I know I've got a good two hours coming, but if they want them punched I know it's all talk.

When I was on tour in Oxford I took a call from a guy for a booking who wanted me to punch him and kick him in the balls.  Assumed he was a timewaster, plus it is not my thing. 

He actually turned up.  Appears he was a real masochist and he taught me how to do it with the upper part of my foot.  Was the most uncomfortable booking of my life - not just for him! Changed my profile to say that I do not do that stuff.  He said that the best session he ever had put him in hospital and had his balls in a sling for 6 weeks.  His wife knew he had "needs" but wouldnt oblige - really? why ever not?  Wierdos
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UrbaneAspects

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #381 on: 21 April 2010, 07:48:38 pm »
Quote from: pandora on 21 April 2010, 06:00:57 pm
When I was on tour in Oxford I took a call from a guy for a booking who wanted me to punch him and kick him in the balls. Changed my profile to say that I do not do that stuff.  He said that the best session he ever had put him in hospital and had his balls in a sling for 6 weeks.  His wife knew he had "needs" but wouldnt oblige - really? why ever not?  Wierdos

I briefly did some 'weird' stuff similar to like you mentioned. And I mean...weird. It got to the point where it just started to disgust me. Fortunently I havent come across such a person in months. When the booking is just too freaky...you can leave feeling pretty screwed up
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miss english

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #382 on: 22 April 2010, 01:40:10 pm »
This one has left me dumbfounded:

Quote
darling

will u work in my home in UK, darlington, as full time live in nanny

i will pay u 400GBP per month and u can save all, ur food and accomodation is free

let me know if this interests u. i am 31, married and 2 kids too

can chat in skype or phone if u want to discuss further

love u

Err, wtf?!
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Mango

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #383 on: 22 April 2010, 03:49:51 pm »
Miss English that is shocking! He really thinks you need to be 'saved'! (from making a good honest living)
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EmilyJones

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #384 on: 22 April 2010, 05:01:40 pm »

Quote
love u


Aaaaha! Hahaha!
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pandora

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #385 on: 22 April 2010, 07:30:38 pm »
Text message of the day

"would like 2 send u a picture of me n my ex doing sumfing i wud like to do 2 u"

this beat the earlier text

" I want a below (sic) job.  I cum quickly.  Will only take 5 mins.  Have 20 quid, give me a ring!
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anonymoussw

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #386 on: 22 April 2010, 07:54:06 pm »
Quote from: miss english on 22 April 2010, 01:40:10 pm
This one has left me dumbfounded:

Quote
darling

will u work in my home in UK, darlington, as full time live in nanny

i will pay u 400GBP per month and u can save all, ur food and accomodation is free

let me know if this interests u. i am 31, married and 2 kids too

can chat in skype or phone if u want to discuss further

love u

Err, wtf?!

If I was an actual nanny I would think I was being ripped off for that. Let alone a professional escort who charges twice that in a NIGHT...
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EmilyJones

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #387 on: 22 April 2010, 08:58:59 pm »
Quote from: bennyboywonder on 22 April 2010, 07:54:06 pm
If I was an actual nanny I would think I was being ripped off for that. Let alone a professional escort who charges twice that in a NIGHT...

You're quite right - the guy forgot to mention that as well as nannying, you'd be performing the duties of a full-time, live-in, never-get-any-peace sex slave. For ?400 which is less than (half?) what a part-time nanny who wouldn't touch your willy would charge. Er, also, shouldn't you be seeking someone with childcare qualifications to look after your '2 kids'? Not that any of us aren't 1000% more responsible than this dood but honestly!

Must stop going over that creepy email - have just noticed it also beings with a simple, poignant, "darling". Baahaha, I'm so disturbed yet amused! I'm going to have to go and cackle at myself in a cupboard now.
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miss english

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #388 on: 23 April 2010, 09:16:34 am »
Quote from: EmilyJones on 22 April 2010, 08:58:59 pm
Quote from: bennyboywonder on 22 April 2010, 07:54:06 pm
If I was an actual nanny I would think I was being ripped off for that. Let alone a professional escort who charges twice that in a NIGHT...

You're quite right - the guy forgot to mention that as well as nannying, you'd be performing the duties of a full-time, live-in, never-get-any-peace sex slave. For ?400 which is less than (half?) what a part-time nanny who wouldn't touch your willy would charge. Er, also, shouldn't you be seeking someone with childcare qualifications to look after your '2 kids'? Not that any of us aren't 1000% more responsible than this dood but honestly!

Must stop going over that creepy email - have just noticed it also beings with a simple, poignant, "darling". Baahaha, I'm so disturbed yet amused! I'm going to have to go and cackle at myself in a cupboard now.

Yep, so many levels of wrong right there.  Why would a London escort want to move to Darlington for less than an au pairs wage? I'm worried I must have child bearing hips or a maternal look about me now! Surely it must have been an attempt to weird me out?

The only consolation is I doubt he has a wife and kids really.  At least I sincerely hope not.
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The Courtesan

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #389 on: 23 April 2010, 08:59:14 pm »
AW Email today:

"Hi, my name is *****. I gone through your profile. truly is quiet interesting to me then, i decide to contact you. i really want to have a good relationship with you. Beside i have a special something i want to discuss with you, so your can reach me through this email ****. Hope to hear from you soon. i will send my pictures to you and also tell you more about my self. i know age will not be a bearer to our relationship, what i need is just your love and caring.  i will give you my best, bye for now. Your love to be blah blah..."

 :-\
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