My first 'I want to whisk you away' phone call:
Him: Babe, I'm not going to be able to make that booking today.
Me (painting toe-nails, thinking about what I'm having for lunch, state of the universe and Eastenders) Aww, no,
babe, I was
sooo looking forward to it.
Him (sounding breathless): Yeah I really wanted to spunk all over your tits <Pause for more heavy breathing> I'll tell you what. I'm going to Rome next next Thursday for a few days, d'you fancy coming with?
Me (big eye roll, supressing giggles):Wow you want to take me to Rome?!
Him (wanking noises now audible): Yeah, you come to Rome, stay in my hotel, and swallow my cum every night for dinner. You'd love that wouldn't you - swallowing all my cum?
Me (in confused voice): Dude, yeah I'd love to swallow your cum or whatever...but like, what if we hate each other?
Him (pausing wanking for just a mo'): What?No we won't hate each other - we'll get on really well, and you'll be swallowing all my cum...every night <low groan>
Me (in firm, maternal, patient tone of saint):Yeah it's just we've never met, and from this phone call alone I
already kind of don't like you, could you imagine how much I'd hate you after a plane trip to Italy?
Him (pleading): What no, don't be silly, you'll love me I swear!
Me (bored now): No, I'm say no. Thanks for the offer
babe, take care.
Him: But babe, I know you'll love swallowing my cummmmmmmmm!!!....
>>Click<<
So many other things I'd rather do in Rome than ingest that man's semen...like contracting the plague, or eating Pizza from a bin by the Trevi fountain (also, I know I should have hung up straight away - but I'm very bored and procrastinating).
