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Author Topic: Do you act more innocent than you are?  (Read 1683 times)

css3456

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Do you act more innocent than you are?
« on: 30 July 2010, 04:43:11 am »
Situation: a new client, we had good chemistry, he was respectful in every way. During the deed, he was getting pervy with some of his sex talk (about seducing a really innocent girl for a threesome, having me fuck her with a strap-on, etc.). It had a kinky, pervy feel -- innocence defiled, girl corrupted, all of that. I really liked it and got into the fantasy with him... but wasn't sure if getting into it would  be seen as trashy and put him off. I could tell he was trying to push my limits and I don't know if it would have been hotter if I'd objected or went along with it. Most of the guys I see put me on a pedestal, which is a bit isolating but easier to know how to deal with!

I know that we're prossies and supposed to be the whore part of the madonna/whore complex, but I just wanted to know how you guys handle things like this.


« Last Edit: 30 July 2010, 04:45:37 am by css3456 »

Harlow

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Re: Do you act more innocent than you are?
« Reply #1 on: 30 July 2010, 05:04:18 am »
Hi

Prossie-yes! Standards-Yes! Boundires-Yes! Maintain them-Yes!

Exploiting-No! Hurt-No! Be taken advantage of-No!

I don't understand your question really? Why just because we get paid for sex does that mean we should accept playing the part of the stereo type or some thing we feel uncomfotable with? So what I should wear mini skirts & torn fishnets & talk about doing some thing cheap & nasty to some one whom maybe naive or worse still inexperienced, just because it will do it for him & I get paid. Not on your life! I have heard so many storys like this that lead on to pedo clients wanting to talk about or worse still act out a fantasy of  child sex or rape. I know that this isn't the same scenario that you mentioned but it angers me all the same!

I am not angry with you & I hope it doesn't come across that way? Every escort is different & every escort knows what she is & isn't comfortable with, if your needing to ask well doesn't that say some thing? The only person that should judge you is you! know your limits & morals & stick to them, say no I'm not comfortable with that when it needs to be said.

H

« Last Edit: 30 July 2010, 05:55:01 am by Harlow »

EmilyJones

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Re: Do you act more innocent than you are?
« Reply #2 on: 30 July 2010, 08:17:48 am »
Hmm. I'd say it's impossible to guess what reaction the client is looking for (unless he actually tells you but then that would make life far too simple!) but the most obvious explanation would be that he is looking for reciprocal dirty talk and would be very happy for you to join in.

I did once see a client who always wanted his escorts to play-act that they were vulnerable and innocent while he verbally described assault but only actually did normal straightforward sex. It was one of those bookings where I spent the whole time wondering if I should just run away because of how horrible it was but because of the lack of any 'real' harm coming to me I felt like maybe I was being a pansy and should just stay. It was very tense overall and decidedly unenjoyable - knowing that you're just a living doll to slot into a guy's fantasy scenario and that next week he'll have a different one and will never give a crap about who you are as a person is a total turn-off for me; I think it's a bad sign if someone clearly doesn't want to acknowledge your humanity during a booking (think that's a phrase I got from you, css!).

Anyway, yes. That just all goes to show that there are marked differences between consensual roleplay and fantasy scenarios and a time when you just get inflicted with unwanted descriptions of acts that give you the creeps. If a client enjoys doing the latter exclusively then I would put him on the No list forever and try to delete his very existence from my memory. But if the client brings up dirty talking and fantasies in a way which is actually giving you the choice on whether or you take part, then I see no problem with it whatsoever - if the fantasy disturbs you, you can make your own decision on whether to terminate the appointment, or if the fantasy is something you like, you could turn the appointment into something really exciting for the client. He probably does want you to join in and enjoy it, too. :)

You should be able to gauge from his manner, reactions and attitudes whether he's getting off on fantasy-sharing or fantasy-inflicting, and then see from there whether you want to go along with it. Sometimes you do just want him to hurry up and get off and so feel prepared to say almost anything in agreement with a standard, "Have you ever been with a girl?" dirty-talk opener. :P

But it's a hard topic to navigate and it's probably an issue that has to be considered on a case-by-case basis. If a client has a deep-seated issue related to the madonna-whore complex then he can go and deal with it in his own time; I can't think of a more immature and sexist way of viewing women so he'd need to go and get it sorted out or at least keep the hell away from me! However, a decent man with a brain of reasonable size generally has no problems understanding that bedroom-time is dirty-time for everyone, ideally, and that seeing more than one dick during your lifetime doesn't magically turn you into a terrible person. That means most clients are the same way and probably wouldn't bring up dirty talk unless they were just genuinely looking for some open-minded and positive responses.

I do think they are paying us to be a little bit of a whore, though, so I usually err on the side of More Slutty in the bedroom rather than Less!
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Harlow

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Re: Do you act more innocent than you are?
« Reply #3 on: 30 July 2010, 09:44:34 am »
I do think they are paying us to be a little bit of a whore, though, so I usually err on the side of More Slutty in the bedroom rather than Less!

Hi again :)

Emily your good! I agree with all you say.

I just want to say as I feel I must come across a little stiff at times, I do - do slut & kink & enjoy it. I hope that css... doesn't think I'm being snobbish, it's just well css I really don't get your question...He indicated what he wanted you liked what he wanted & gave it to him! In my world that is job done. 

H

css3456

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Re: Do you act more innocent than you are?
« Reply #4 on: 30 July 2010, 10:00:22 am »
Thanks, Emily! (And Harlow too -- no offense taken! I know what you mean about those really weird clients. I had one of those already.)

I know what you mean about guys inflicting fantasies, and this wasn't like that. It was definitely interactive and I got the sense that if I'd said no, he would have changed the subject or just gotten on with the physical part. He was nice and respectful in other ways and I felt comfortable and liked him -- a lot. The only issue was that this was more pervy than I'm used to and I wasn't sure if in general guys would want me to go along with it or if they're looking for someone to set a limit on them. (Guys I've dated in civvie life have been disturbed when I went along with their pervy fantasies.)

EmilyJones

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Re: Do you act more innocent than you are?
« Reply #5 on: 30 July 2010, 10:46:58 am »
(Guys I've dated in civvie life have been disturbed when I went along with their pervy fantasies.)

I can imagine that; an ex actually accused me of being a sex addict just because I like doin' it on the regular, and he wasn't even joking. ::)

I'm not sure with clients. I think it might just be one of the good parts of the paid sex encounter - neither of you have the kind of huge expectations and reservations that seem to go hand in hand with 'normal' relationships and even many casual dates. It's not like a (sane) client would expect you not to be sleeping with anyone else so he'd have no reason to get huffy or moody at any indication that you A) enjoy sex and B) intend to do it with whoever you want, whenever you want while you aren't committed to anyone. I think it's a real blessing of the job - the only expectation is awesome sex, usually. :D

I just want to say as I feel I must come across a little stiff at times, I do - do slut & kink & enjoy it. I hope that css... doesn't think I'm being snobbish, it's just well css I really don't get your question...He indicated what he wanted you liked what he wanted & gave it to him! In my world that is job done. 

Oops, forgot to add - I quite agree, here. You said it much more succinctly than me! Job well done, indeed.
« Last Edit: 30 July 2010, 10:49:34 am by EmilyJones »
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Lucy Chambers

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Re: Do you act more innocent than you are?
« Reply #6 on: 31 July 2010, 08:44:14 pm »
I like all kinds of things sexually- if I had to sit down and try and figure out why I think I would probably come to the conclusion I am a sick puppy.

My advice is if you decide to offer a service, ie, roleplay, sub work, swallow, sploshing, rimming, etc, do so only if you slightly enjoy it, understand it and can cope with it.

Otherwise, stick to the vanilla services, you will not disappoint and there are many clients for that sector also. If you are finding yourself troubled by the fact that you were aroused by what you are doing, get used to it. Its usually the oddest clients that are amazingly horny.

Edit..I am a sick puppy.
« Last Edit: 31 July 2010, 08:46:21 pm by Lucy Chambers »

Miss Jameson

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Re: Do you act more innocent than you are?
« Reply #7 on: 01 August 2010, 01:52:27 pm »
I think he may have been watching too much porn. Guys are turned on by a multitude of things, and if talking him through the fantasy got him off, you did your job. As long as he didn't make you do it, or afterwards talk about living it out.

I draw the line at incestuous, pediphilic  or religious scenarios and talk. And trust me, they're out there. I get calls like, 'you look like my 15 year old stepdaughter. Would you pretend to be her?' 'I want you to say "daddy stop it, you're hurting me" while we're doing it.' When I call them perverts for their thoughts, I get the 'wow, a whore with a conscience' type statements. Not my type of clients anyway. If you get a guy that you can't deal with, DON'T. If you're not experienced in an area, don't say you are. It's easier to be taken advantage of in the end. I had a friend agree to a submissive role play in the MIDDLE of a supposed GFE session, just so he could choke her and ask her if she's scared. No safe word, no nothing. She got through it, and he was the same sweetheart he was at the start of the session, but how scared do you think she was after that of running into a sicko?

Some guys with weird fantasies don't disclose them for shock value, to see how we handle it. They get off thinking we're soulless, limitless people who'll do anything. Especially in the case of your fellow since stereotypically our innocence has been robbed from us. For some the nastier the scenario the better. I say job well done on this one.
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