This use to happen to me when I first started escorting, I use to get a lot of pain after each client.

The truth is you won't be fucking for more then 10 min if you do you job right.
I normally start off with blow job to get them started for about 5 min then have sex but use plenty of lub and even in between sex I re apply more lub to avoid any friction of pain. Normally within 10 min they will come and if they take longer then usual I ask them to stop and say it's hurting me and finish with a hand job. Most client are understandable and agree as they don't like see a girl in pain and that's how a girl should be treated.

It takes time to build your confidence in how to handle these men but honestly 90% of them are friendly and you should be fine.

Try not to let your past slow you down and affect you, hope it goes well for you
 

you may be suprized how many clients dont want sex!!
i did an oral only special recently and had about 15 booking request a day put through!

You can pick up tips on massage by offering yourself as a model for student masseurs as they need bodies to practice on. Just don't nod off but pay attention to the class or lesson if it's one to one and take it all in. That way you get a free lesson and can feel what is good or bad and all for free. All so of course there is you tube for the short term.

Well, I'm going to actually get this show on the road and start escorting this week. Pictures have been taken, the profile has been written, and I'll be moving in 3 days.

In all of my preparation and worrying, I forgot about one of the most important things. Actually having the sex.

So, I am quite "small" down there, I really hate to say "tight" because of that myth that virgins are tighter, but I suppose it does apply to me. I've had lots of sex but have never been able to have penetrative sex to the point of orgasm, in fact I have always had to stop due to the unbearable pain.

I went to the doctor who checked me out and decided there was nothing wrong with me physically and that I had vaginismus - my vagina muscles would tighten as a result of nerves and not being naturally lubricated enough. This made sense, as the first time I tried penetrative sex with my boyfriend at the time, I really wasn't that turned on, and the times after I had just built up nerves and braced myself for the pain.

So through the course of our relationship we didn't have penetrative sex and just did everything else instead. Over the past month or so, we decided to try penetrative sex again as now I really will have to get over the pain if I'm doing this kind of work!

To no avail, it still hurt like hell, though again I just wasn't that turned on. I wasn't strictly very attracted to this guy and he wasn't very brilliant at sex, to say the least. At one point during our sexcapades though, I was super turned on and he was eating me out and fingering me quite violently, and it didn't hurt at all because I was that wet! We didn't try penetrative then because we didn't have condoms on hand, but I am confident that at that time I would have been fine as he was able to fit three fingers in and thrust them in quite vigorously and I wasn't in any pain. I then tried on my own while watching porn and I was able to fit all kinds of household objects in there. I certainly won't be able to handle very thick penises but I think I can deal with the average!

However, now the issue is that if I can only handle penetration while super duper turned on.... How in hell am I going to survive if, well let's be honest, I won't be at all aroused most of the time when I'm working? I know what you're thinking: Lube. We did try that as well, again I wasn't at all into it and just wanted to get to a point where I was comfortable with penetration, but no matter how much lube I applied it just felt like he was stabbing me with a knife. I really feel like what's going on is that my muscles just won't allow for penetration unless I'm really into it, and lube won't open those muscles after all.

I have been raped before and I don't know if this may be some kind of reaction to that. Either way, it is really worrying as I'm starting next week and I don't know if I'll be able to just grit my teeth and bare it! It really is the worst pain I've felt.

Any ideas? Any similar experiences? I'm terrified over here, this is my only shot at an income right now and to not even be able to do the work leaves me in a horrible position. I have a new boyfriend now and will be staying with him for the weekend. He is insanely hot so maybe that will put me at ease and I can get some more practise.... But that is hardly comparable to work as they are not going to be models unless I get very lucky!

I suffer from vaginismus too, probably from sexual abuse experienced in my early teens. I completely understand what you mean about the tightness. When I finally came round to losing my "virginity" with a very nice boy when I was 16, it was disastrous! It honestly took me a couple of years of sex with boyfriends/friends to get to the point of enjoying sex and not always being hurt by it. Despite what happened to me when I was younger, when it came to consensual sex, I was always very very turned on but the site of a penis going near me made me clamp up, completely opposite to what I wanted. I remember one time having sex, saying to my boyfriend "you put the condom on, I'm keeping my eyes shut, and kiss me, and push into me gently when you're ready" and it was the first time I wasn't in massive amounts of pain. That was the time that was the beginning of sex getting easier. I think I had to get past that subconscious barrier in my brain that went No! When I was about to have sex. Now I can handle any stranger I'm not attracted to just fine, as long as they are small/average sized. I do still have problems with big clients, as I guess having vaginismus means my muscles are very "toned" and so I'm generally really tight. With big clients it takes a lot of lube and patience.
So a summary of my experience with post-attack vaginismus is that it's about overcoming that little subconscious bit of your brain that freaks out and then just keep trying with patient partners you trust but again, that's my personal experience and for me, I couldn't imagine going into this job before I sorted that out, although you may find you can practice on the job?? I am unsure!
Hope my shared experience helps in some way. X

Sorry to hear about your problems with intercourse. I have the same thing (although mine is from a medical condition relating to my pelvis and urinary tract). My whole life I've associated sex with pain  and have only managed to enjoy it occasionally.

I don't think that you should offer something which hurts you unless you absolutely have no other choice.

I do massage and relief and I make a good living and I'm busy enough. It is a bit different from full services but it's not too hard to get the hang of. I started in a massage parlour where I was taught the basics of massage (you could look up some techniques and vids on youtube would probably give you the same idea), then when I went indie I did a course in proper massage (which did cost around ?1400, but remember I worked for years before and got good enough that clients used to assume I was totally qualified!). At one point I used to offer everything BUT penetration (like I did kissing, oral on me etc but just no sex) and I was crazy busy. You'll be surprised at how many men don't want PIV sex. You will likely need to charge a bit less than full service and make it very clear on your profile what you do and don't do. However if you don't have much free time and only want a couple of bookings a week I'd keep your price quite high and go from there. When i was studying and only wanted a couple of bookings a week I charged ?140 for an hour massage and I did get a couple a week.

Good Luck x x x

Helena, please take care, because I don't think there can be any guarantees at all that clients will always be understanding, no matter how selective you are or how good your screening is. They want uncomplicated sex, so be clear about what you're willing to offer.

Good luck.

There was a program on Radio 4 Women's Hour a few months ago about this... this is something that can be treated. It may need surgery but it can be fixed.