Funnily enough I was just thinking about that this morning. I think maybe there's an element of that when you have kids with someone, or want kids with them. Subconsciously you want them to stay at least long enough to protect you and the kids until they're grown. It's all a bit caveman, but you're right about the genetic thing.

Since my son grew up, and I can't have any more (wouldn't want to at this age anyway) the appeal of monogamy has really dwindled for me.

VC, thank you for sharing your amazing insights.  The appeal of monogamy did majorly lapse in my case, too.  Looking back, I only remember all kinds of trouble my previous LTRs brought me.      You're so right about "caveman" instinct.  I agree 100%!  I find that all LTRs have its sell by date. 

Of course, this isn't meant to dismiss all the LTRs where two people are happy with each other or at least they consider that their relationship is "happy enough".   

Well spotted.  If you had ever looked on his mobile...

Based on my firm belief, they tend to chase anything which moves or which has a pulse.  They might be having an affair but he may well be having others going (off hook-up sites / dating sites / god knows what else) as well as porn sites, wife, female colleagues at work etc.   

I dated an ex client. He turned out to be an emotionally unavailable, selfish, manipulative prick.

 

Exactly the same happened with me, I would never ever date a client again, it was one of the biggest mistakes of my life.


It does seem to work out well for some people though, but for me no way.

I know there are exceptions to this rule (as some on this thread have proven...being married etc to ex clients). However, I read a quote once that said a relationship will end where it begins and I think there is truth in that in the escort/client relationship. In other words, generally, if you meet your man in a context by which he is in control of what occurs to a greater extent, then what's the likelihood he will be the type of man who is willing to engage in an equal relationship? In my experience, the client I fell for wanted it to remain on his terms.

 

Lol! Hilarious. Pump and dumps are the girls with pimps who you fuck and then as soon as you've cum your kicked out. 

Technically we are all 'pump and dumps' as you put it, you're a hooker and your clients fuck you then leave and go back to their wives,  we are all in the same boat .

Your boyfriend sounds like a right catch.

Exactly the same happened with me, I would never ever date a client again, it was one of the biggest mistakes of my life.


It does seem to work out well for some people though, but for me no way.

  Selfish, manipulative, emotionally available... Add, wanting freebies from escorts.

Well I'm with an ex punter and have been for 2 years now.All going well and not even a hint that he wants to go back to punting.He punted now and then when his marriage was on it's last legs and his wife had been refusing any intimacy (including cuddles)for years.He is very devoted,affectionate,kind and loving and has never given me any reason to think he would stray be it paid or unpaid.So yes it is possibl to meet,fall in love and have a good relationship with an ex punter although in fairness he only saw me on a paid booking twice.He was a regular of several close sex worker mates of mine.We met up again in a civvy capacity.and that's when we were able to be ourselves and we really hit it off.

But how many clients have you dated?

I mean, I could say "every marriage I've had has failed. Men who want to get married are total arses!" and I'd be pulling from a sample size of one

The question should be 'how many clients have I fallen in love with, welcomed into my home/life/my family: The answer is one and it was a mistake because once you start mixing business with private life it becomes blurred.  I always said that I wouldn't get emotionally involved with clients because I just knew it would lead to problems...clients search us out for what they're looking for then come to us with their needs/wants/desires and we do what they want in that time because they're paying, that's simple hassle free but once you step over that line everything changes and eventually over time his true personality came through and it wasn't sex he was using me for it was for something far more complex.  I knew deep down at the time that I was making a wrong choice but ignored my instincts, so once bitten twice shy