SAAFE forum
General Category => Blather and Babble => Topic started by: mssa on 24 April 2014, 07:13:58 pm
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Mine! :
- I keep accidently having real orgasms, so the client then knows what I sound like, and should they become a regular I can never fake it again without coming across as too theatrical :FF :FF :FF
- Also the multiple showers are quite drying, and the amount of babyoil I'm getting through afterwards.
- I miss letting my hair dry natural rather than the constant blow-dries
- Also I'm a nail biter and keeping then nice and painted is a real conscious effort for me
- This one isn't silly so much as stupid but I was bursting for a wee today but forgot to go as soon as the doorbell rang for a 1hr booking, so by the time he left I realised I was in real agony and even having a wee didn't relieve it for ages, very stupid of me to not have just excused myself and had a quick pee :-\
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Having to shave my legs everyday
The amount of sheets/towels etc I wash
Having to avoid eating garlic (I love it)
Trying to find stockings that don't have ladders
Finding something to do in between clients apart from watching Jeremy Kyle repeats or playing candy crush
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I'm with you on the hair front! It takes me 40 minute just to blow dry mine and it's incredibly frizzy so I then have to roll it up and wander about in a head scarf incase I get a last minute booking. So time consuming!
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People who ask for basic details such as prices and town I'm located in when they are calling on my adult work phone. Then to add to the irritation "whats your name" before i say goodbye. I just text them my website address now. I find that irritating. If you have time to note down 20 numbers you have time to note down 10 and the names
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I'm with you on the hair front! It takes me 40 minute just to blow dry mine and it's incredibly frizzy so I then have to roll it up and wander about in a head scarf incase I get a last minute booking. So time consuming!
try John Frieda serum from Boots, it works wonders :)
On topic, the guys who are asking what Im wearing, what I will do to them, who are calling me babe (most of them just time wasters of course) and the noise from drilling the cement in a street nearby when Im with a client is most iritating for me :D
Plus the amount of stuff I buy when I go just for bread or milk and end up breaking my hand with a full heavy bag :FF
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Having to avoid eating garlic (I love it)
Same here. I adore it. I have to limit it to the weekends now (even then, that's tricky, as I'm usually out and about). Also I have to be careful with the amount of cheese I eat, as it doesn't agree with me and can make me sore down there, which can make sex very uncomfortable. :(
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Plus the amount of stuff I buy when I go just for bread or milk and end up breaking my hand with a full heavy bag :FF
Omg this is me, practically come back with a weekly shop sometimes.
Also to add, having to lug a heavy bag around!
Another one - although not so silly - is the secrecy. No one knows what I do so when my bf informed me of his surprise visit I was like a headless chicken getting my hours changed and being all "but darling, WHEN do you arrive DO tell me now?! No really I mean it!" haha
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People who ask for basic details such as prices and town I'm located in when they are calling on my adult work phone. Then to add to the irritation "whats your name" before i say goodbye. I just text them my website address now. I find that irritating. If you have time to note down 20 numbers you have time to note down 10 and the names
Yes that really pisses me off..or people who seem to not listen to your details..and ask you the same thing 2 or 3 times..I just refer them back to the site.
No shows...really irritating.
Guys that ring up and ask to see you in 10 mins time!
guys who have a shower and you walk in afterwards to find your shower covered in pubes, towels all over the floor and water also all over the floor..did they shower or have a fight with the appliances?
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My silliest gripe is shaving all the time.
Wearing stockings
that feeling when. Why does my a client is performing RO on you and you suddenly need to fart and then thats all you can think about.
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My silliest gripe is shaving all the time.
Wearing stockings
that feeling when. Why does my a client is performing RO on you and you suddenly need to fart and then thats all you can think about.
OMG you lot make me chuckle............. that had my in giggles !
But yes mine is
Having to wash my hair every bloody day. Just have to and dry shampoo just doesn't work when I need to look ok for bookings.
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Shaving is such a chore. I love not doing it
until it gets to that, would I be embarrassed if I was taken to A&E, stage when I have time off ;D
Having to avoid food that either make my breath dodgy, e.g. garlic, spring onions, or food that is bound to make me bloated or fart (soya mince...love it, but bloody hell! LOL :P)
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I used to drink diet cola on a daily basis but now avoid carbonated drinks as it tends to make me bloat. I never realised how sensitive my tummy is when no one was seeing me nekkid. But after escorting, I'm a little more conscious of my figure and hated the bloat whenever I imbibe a gassy drink. I now mostly drink tea and water. I know avoiding soft drinks is also good for my general health but there are days when I miss my Coke. I only sip it on days I don't see clients.
I also force myself to down plain yogurt at least once a day as I find that it prevents yeast infection. It also helps build good bacteria in the vagina and I find that it keeps me from smelling down there.
I'm beginning to do a lot more of healthy things to keep in shape. Admittedly I wouldn't be so disciplined if men weren't paying me for my time/body. I drag myself to the gym more often with this incentive.
I hate the shaving bit as well. I'm quite hairy and have to shave my legs at least every day if I'm seeing clients. If I shave in the morning, chances are that by evening, there would be stubble and if I have appointments at night, I might have to shave again depending on the growth. I recently decided to fork out $$$ for IPL hair removal on my legs. Best. Decision. Ever.
I also started keeping condoms in all my bags in case I get last minute bookings. I worry about people finding them or seeing them when I open my bag.
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People that put in bloody booking requests on A.W without speaking/emailing first....late at night and usually for your first appointment of the day....grrr.
Having days when you are up and at em and you don't get a booking until 4pm...
Fancying a day off or being busy doing something or other and your phone going like billio..
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emails or phone calls or texts asking "r u working?".
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My silliest gripe is shaving all the time.
Wearing stockings
that feeling when. Why does my a client is performing RO on you and you suddenly need to fart and then thats all you can think about.
oh god yeah. I had that once or twice in the past and had to tense so hard not too. Both times the gusy said.."gosh you have a lovely firm bum dont you" and I just cold sweated and said "mm thanks" but then could un tense when the feeling went away as my ass would suddenly be not so "lovely and firm" haha x
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Shaving- I'm so with you all on this front. I can't stand shaving every day. Especially when the hairs are so short it actually hurts. Love letting it grow out and then shaving it again so I'm all soft and smooth.
Not being able to exercise when I want- I have a new found love of Jillian Michaels DVDs but man she makes me sweat so if I'm booked on to work I can't just do a sneaky 20 minutes without having to get ready all over again.
The garlic/onion thing. This depresses me no end. I actually ate some of a raw red onion last night & it was sooo good but today I have noticed even after brushing twice it's still lingering, and the toothpaste I use (herbal) contains black pepper so it actually made the taste stronger D:
And finally, lipstick. I love wearing lipstick, but I can't wear it for work without risking making me and the client look like the joker. And whenever I am not working I am with my boyfriend so the same thing applies. Horribly depressing.
xx
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Having to avoid eating garlic (I love it)
Same here. I adore it. I have to limit it to the weekends now (even then, that's tricky, as I'm usually out and about). Also I have to be careful with the amount of cheese I eat, as it doesn't agree with me and can make me sore down there, which can make sex very uncomfortable. :(
Honestly I have two garlic capsules and other things from seventh wave every day nobody comments. When it comes to things like that shouldn't be depriving yourself. Garlic cleans blood.
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Shaving- I'm so with you all on this front. I can't stand shaving every day. Especially when the hairs are so short it actually hurts. Love letting it grow out and then shaving it again so I'm all soft and smooth.
Not being able to exercise when I want- I have a new found love of Jillian Michaels DVDs but man she makes me sweat so if I'm booked on to work I can't just do a sneaky 20 minutes without having to get ready all over again.
The garlic/onion thing. This depresses me no end. I actually ate some of a raw red onion last night & it was sooo good but today I have noticed even after brushing twice it's still lingering, and the toothpaste I use (herbal) contains black pepper so it actually made the taste stronger D:
And finally, lipstick. I love wearing lipstick, but I can't wear it for work without risking making me and the client look like the joker. And whenever I am not working I am with my boyfriend so the same thing applies. Horribly depressing.
xx
try Maybelline 24 Hour super stay lipstick, its great, wont live stains and you wont look like a joker :D
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Also the new Revlon Just Bitten Lipstains chubby stick!
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- I keep accidently having real orgasms, so the client then knows what I sound like, and should they become a regular I can never fake it again without coming across as too theatrical :FF :FF :FF
OMG I have this problem too!!! It's always a hard decision when I should fake an orgasm... :P
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- I keep accidently having real orgasms, so the client then knows what I sound like, and should they become a regular I can never fake it again without coming across as too theatrical :FF :FF :FF
OMG I have this problem too!!! It's always a hard decision when I should fake an orgasm... :P
If it wasn't for my boyfriend I'd try get as many as I could haha, but I don't like to then go home to him already orgasm'd out :P
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People that put in bloody booking requests on A.W without speaking/emailing first
That's got to be one of mine too Bibi, especially when it's for a ridiculous hour.
Another for me is people who play text-tennis or text you just for the sake of it, when they don't actually want a booking. Things like "Hey hows you" or "I've been thinking about you and can't wait to see you again some time" yada yada yada. Polite and all, but I've had a few of them this week and it can be annoying especially when you're having a quiet day and waiting for genuine bookings.
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I also have no desire to wear makeup or do my hair when I'm not working, is nice to scrape my hair back and wear casual clothes, is a shame because getting glammed up is a chore for me now x
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I don't mind the shaving but I do get tired of obsessing over how clean my buttonhole is all the time. I mean, in normal life I am normally clean like a normal person but I'm super paranoid about it when I am working.
OK. I'm probably weird. :-[
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I don't mind the shaving but I do get tired of obsessing over how clean my buttonhole is all the time. I mean, in normal life I am normally clean like a normal person but I'm super paranoid about it when I am working.
OK. I'm probably weird. :-[
Nope Im the same. Especially as guys never seem to warn you that they are going to rim you.
Also with lipstick have you tried Lypsyl which you coat over your lipstick.
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Stupid bloody emails asking if you will come to Belfast,London,Isle of Man...Timbuktoo....I mean what the feck?
Your phone suddenly lighting up when you have a mouthful of lunch.
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i had a new one yesterday and its one really for those ladies who provide OWO.
Clients with bad diets. :-X
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Clients taking forever to cum with 5 minutes left of their booking :FF
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Shaving! I thought it was just me.
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When i get on with a client & want them to stay longer but need to not get carried away with free time chatting to make sure the boundary is still there.
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aaaaaaaaaaaaa..... hillarious !!!
guys who have a shower and you walk in afterwards to find your shower covered in pubes, towels all over the floor and water also all over the floor..did they shower or have a fight with the appliances?
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aaaaaaaaaaaaa..... hillarious !!!
guys who have a shower and you walk in afterwards to find your shower covered in pubes, towels all over the floor and water also all over the floor..did they shower or have a fight with the appliances?
Had a client this week who came out the shower and said "oh bit of water on the floor sorry" when he left and I went to get in the shower it was un fucking believable! Like he had tipped a bucket of water on the floor! What the hell did he do in there?
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When the subject line of an email starts "Re:" when it's their first email. I feel like they're trying to trick me into opening the email. (or maybe it's just me)
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When an email or text begins with "hi babe/Hun/ sexy" gives me the creeps! X
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Silliest-
When I've just started cooking dinner, like the chicken has literally just hit the skillet, then I get a request for booking within the hour. Happens frequently!
Clients putting their clothes/used towels on upholstery and not on the dressing table - So gross and rude!
Having to do laundry everyday is a pain since I don't have a washer/dryer inside my apartment. There's a security camera in the complex's laundry room & by now the staff must figure I have a obsessive compulsion to bleach the fckk out of my linens once a day! ;D
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Silliest-
When I've just started cooking dinner, like the chicken has literally just hit the skillet, then I get a request for booking within the hour. Happens frequently!
Clients putting their clothes/used towels on upholstery and not on the dressing table - So gross and rude!
Having to do laundry everyday is a pain since I don't have a washer/dryer inside my apartment. There's a security camera in the complex's laundry room & by now the staff must figure I have a obsessive compulsion to bleach the fckk out of my linens once a day! ;D
You could get like a weeks worth of linen to change everyday then do one massive load once a week?
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When a client wants to stare into your eyes while you're f**king. There's only so much pretending I can do...
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God, so many of these ring true.
One particular one for me is forgetting NOT to pee just before a client when I know he wants water sports..
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Silliest-
When I've just started cooking dinner, like the chicken has literally just hit the skillet, then I get a request for booking within the hour. Happens frequently!
Clients putting their clothes/used towels on upholstery and not on the dressing table - So gross and rude!
Having to do laundry everyday is a pain since I don't have a washer/dryer inside my apartment. There's a security camera in the complex laundry room & by now the staff must figure I have a obsessive compulsion to bleach the fckk out of my linens once a day! ;D
You could get like a weeks worth of linen to change everyday then do one massive load once a week?
I could do that and I used to. Since it's now super hot where I live (heatwave last week hit triple digits) all the massage oil and ejaculate would ferment in the hamper. Ferment and stain!
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That clients keep requesting a specific pair of shoes that i no longer have. Funnily enough, when i had the said shoes nobody was bothered about requesting them :FF
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Heres's a silly gripe: my morning poops are regularly timed in such a way that taking a slightly earlier booking is problematic.
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Clients who slobber/lick/eat your face. Especially with bad breath.
The way clients message you. I had a text yesterday that didn't say anything other than "18?" Is it really so hard to say "Hi, my name is x, I'd really like to see you for an hour this afternoon at my hotel in the city centre. Just wondering, are you really 18?"
[link removed - please don't post these here]
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When clients in parlours decline OWO for extra? but immediately upon putting a condom on they say 'i like my balls being licked/suck my balls'. I have found it's the men with hairy balls that do this, I wouldn't suck those kind of jungle balls if they had paid extra for OWO.
Over excited men in quicky brothel bookings grind my gears too. As soon as you finish covered oral, they want you to climb on top and have no patience to wait 10 secs while I change the condom.
Similarly, clients who think its possible to put a condom on a limp penis the size of my little finger (smaller even) and then get on top. Mission penetration impossible.
Not so much a silly gripe, I'm mostly irritated by the things that could have an impact on my health. As such, I can't believe how many grown, adult men think it's okay to try and rub their bare penis over my genitals.
I've just realised, I need to try being an independent escort again. I'm clearly p'd off with parlour punting.
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- Guys who spank hard without asking! They get a firm warning.
- Shaving everyday
- Washing linen everyday
- Guys who kiss like a washing machine and you end up secretly wiping all they're saliva off your face! Gross!
- Men with poor hygiene, and dirty down stairs yet they've just showered! Feel like it's something men just don't pay enough attention too.
- Bartering with clients you've seen once before an they think because they've paid full price once, they should now receive a special deal!
But most of these concerning the clients aren't everyday occurrences thankfully :) Well besides the bartering, seems everyone in this area loves to try they're luck!
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I saw a butcher who I kid you not even after the preliminary shower still brought in the smell of raw meat,
Also clients who are so hairy down below that they can't quite rinse the shower gel out or dry properly and I end up with a tongue full of leftover suds
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I hate it when I try to help another escort with informations on aw and shes not even saying thanks, just reading the email.
I felt like shit and its not the first time. I should stop.
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I don't understand guys who spray their junk with aftershave or whatever, and then refuse a shower :-X makes giving head so much more difficult, especially if its awful aftershave.
I like to think that they think they're being considerate, wanting to smell good, but please stop.
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I don't understand guys who spray their junk with aftershave or whatever, and then refuse a shower :-X makes giving head so much more difficult, especially if its awful aftershave.
I like to think that they think they're being considerate, wanting to smell good, but please stop.
Yes, this and even when they put cologne all over their neck and shoulders.
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when you are left reeking of their aftershave :-X
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Men who even after a shower smell like a urinal.
Hotel lifts that have clearly just carried a smoker
Clients who can't follow simple instructions
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showering too much and shaving
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- Guys who spank hard without asking! They get a firm warning.
- Shaving everyday
- Washing linen everyday
- Guys who kiss like a washing machine and you end up secretly wiping all they're saliva off your face! Gross!
- Men with poor hygiene, and dirty down stairs yet they've just showered! Feel like it's something men just don't pay enough attention too.
- Bartering with clients you've seen once before an they think because they've paid full price once, they should now receive a special deal!
But most of these concerning the clients aren't everyday occurrences thankfully :) Well besides the bartering, seems everyone in this area loves to try they're luck!
One guy I see spanks me really hard I feel like texting my son to come bring the axe down.
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Silent or quiet ones.... at least moan or grunt if you can't talk guys!
Anyone with too much aftershave -I appreciate the effort to smell nice but why spray your junk with aftershave it tastes rank, clean up in my bathroom or before you get here!
Gum chewers! Why can't guys just spit out gum before they start kissing? I Don't want your gum guys! Grrr!
Anyone who pisses on my floor! I have verbally crucified my exes for this. Aim! I am happy to lick up their cum but I do not want to have to disinfect my bathroom and wipe up pee!
People who leave streaks on my towels. They are nice towels, I dint know what some marks on them are but I dont want to know!
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-The amount of hot water and gas I use on gas for showers and heating
-The constant bloody shaving etc and STILL not having a smooth pussy
-The stress of trying to book everyone in when they want to when they keep changing they're mind!!
-Feeling like my life's not my own
-The constant washing of sheets and towels
-Having sex when i'm tired/not in the mood
-Kidding on I'm all brightness and light when I'm in a c**t of a mood ;)
As for the blow-drying my hair, I still let it dry naturally, I don't even own a hair-dryer! My hair's so straight it wouldn't
make any difference..
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I suppose the main thing for me is we never really know exactly how much we are going to earn each week. I do set a target however and this is fine as a yardstick but living with a fluctuating income can get rather tedious. It is hard to plan financially to an extent.
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Clients taking forever to cum with 5 minutes left of their booking :FF
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Having problems in the industry and not being able to confide in anybody
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Having a client say cheerily, 'Hello, I saw you 4 years ago'.
Nearly half a decade....
I think 'who cancelled you today then?'....fuck off.
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Booking without messaging me first.
Enemas as I do anal so cleanse beforehand.
When I get a booking at midday and then one at 8pm. Prefer to get them done in the afternoon so I can then relax. Otherwise might feel bloated from dinner n have to do a second enema as well.
Not being able to eat garlic, curry, eggs, onions etc.
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Shaving every freaking day.
When a client uses 5 towels after a shower or to dry his hands...or when they just HAVE to use a big towel, a hand towel and a face cloth in a one hour booking. Grrrrrr.
Never being able to eat when or what I want b/c I need to have a flat stomach at all times, not be bloated, might need to do anal at a moment's notice, have to smell and taste fresh down there which means tons of greens and fruit and also need to not have a growling stomach during an appointment. It's a hard road.
Clients who come on the bed/sheets during hotel incalls or at my apartment. Especially when I'm doing a hotel incall and I only have one bed in the room, wtf am I supposed to do?
Not wanting to interact with or even look at men when I'm not working.
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Hand him one small towel.... ;)
Hide the others.
They will work it out...honest ;D
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Having a client say cheerily, 'Hello, I saw you 4 years ago'.
Nearly half a decade....
I think 'who cancelled you today then?'....fuck off.
hahahaha
And I'd like to add: shaving. And shaving. And more shaving. And all that shaving. And the shaving I must do. And I've been shaving so much I've got serious stubble by 3 pm. Shaving. Wtf? Why? Shaving!!!! Argggg! SHAVING!
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Getting asked question after question that is quite clearly stated on my profile.
Plus repetitive texts from a client after a booking that hasn't been back in a while x :FF
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Getting asked question after question that is quite clearly stated on my profile.
Plus repetitive texts from a client after a booking that hasn't been back in a while x
Not forgeting i say no. no, no, no, no to bareback and still bloody get asked it x :FF :FF
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Avoiding certain foods due to lingering smell/taste etc. Im now on holiday and it's just bliss eating whatever the hell I want without worrying if some punter will find my breath rank.
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When they push my shower head all the way to the top and secure it too tightly so I can't reach it or undo it to bring it back down again ::)
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When they push my shower head all the way to the top and secure it too tightly so I can't reach it or undo it to bring it back down again ::)
Yeah!
When I show them how the shower opens
and they say 'yeh yeah...I've been in a shower before!'.
Then I hear them mashing-up the
place, obviously didn't listen to a word.
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Asking me if I'm still tight. I am literally considering writing a blog post about this but I have a big feeling I'll regret it. I can not believe these people need to be schooled on basic female anatomy.
Using the word "meet" - I remember Amy mentioned this the other day and until then I thought I was the only one or just being stupid, but I bloody despise that word.
The CONSTANT "Are you still 18?/Are you really 18?". I don't know if it's because my profile is written in straight sentences or because my security procedures suggest I'm not as naive as I'm supposed to be at this age, but about 5 people in total seem to believe my age and the rest snigger whenever I talk about university also. Right, good luck thinking I'm a liar when you come into my hotel room and my notes are everywhere. I am going to make a point of having my work folders out.
These are all very petty but I had to vent, these do my head in.
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Leaving the tub disgusting after a shower. How hard is it to rinse it when you're done?!
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Staying up until midnight several nights in a row in order to feature on AW for my next trip to London. I really hate it!
Last night, though, I set my alarm for 11:55 and it worked out OK.
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When they take a shower and you go into the bathroom after them and they haven't used the bath mat just soaked the whole floor and then you tread in the water in your stockings !! So annoying
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When they try and hand you the used condom rather than put it in the bin themselves.. umm :-X :FF
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When they try and hand you the used condom rather than put it in the bin themselves.. umm :-X :FF
I always take it off them and dispose of it. I don't want to fish it out of the bin so I take it off and put it in a little baggie with the wrapper.
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one of the many gripes is.. I have to ask them to wash their cocks after they wee before or during their visit if they want owo as I will not go down on that cock unwashed :o
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The smelly ones :FF
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When they try and hand you the used condom rather than put it in the bin themselves.. umm :-X :FF
I always take it off them and dispose of it. I don't want to fish it out of the bin so I take it off and put it in a little baggie with the wrapper.
yeah i prefer they do it. The bin is in a pretty obvious position to pop it in (which is obviously changed after every client) ;D
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Face Stubble :FF rough/scratch your face and pussy stubble ::)
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Wiping sweat of themselves and then putting their hands on you... urgh!
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It just cracks me when they assume we work 8h per day, 5 days per week. And still they don't understand how appointment system works and they say "uuuuum, aaaam how about I'll pop around 7?". Seriously mate? Do you make appointment with your dentist at "around 2"? wrrrrr!!!
Oh, and since we make sooooooo much money (40h per week, yeah?) it's ok to just not show up. In the end it doesn't make any difference for us, does it? ::)
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Pulling out my ponytail - if I don't have my hair down, there is a reason!
Client a few days ago even went so far as to take out my hair and then stick his hands in it and rub it around my face while we were kissing - How on earth is that sexy?! ??? ???
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Pulling out my ponytail - if I don't have my hair down, there is a reason!
Client a few days ago even went so far as to take out my hair and then stick his hands in it and rub it around my face while we were kissing - How on earth is that sexy?! ??? ???
That image really made me laugh. One of my regulars took my hair extension (wire one you pull like a halo) put it on his face like a beard and ran round the room naked. I'm not joking x ;D it made me laugh
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See now that is funny, and you could laugh at it. I had to keep a straight face and keep kissing all the while thinking 'what. the. fuck.' ::)
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See now that is funny, and you could laugh at it. I had to keep a straight face and keep kissing all the while thinking 'what. the. fuck.' ::)
I think I would have asked him what the fuck he was doing haha x :)
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I've noticed that guys don't read profiles at all, I think it's because when they're horny all rationale and coherent thoughts go out the window, so annoying.
May as well put just a pic on your profile, you'd still get the same response from them.
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When they don't know how to kiss! Had one client stiffen his tongue, jab at mine and then waggle it up and down. It makes it more unpleasant than it has to be :/ He was married as well. I don't understand.
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It's worse when they wiggle their tongue incessantly and do nothing else, so you end up with loads of saliva because no one is closing their mouths.
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When they don't know how to kiss! Had one client stiffen his tongue, jab at mine and then waggle it up and down. It makes it more unpleasant than it has to be :/ He was married as well. I don't understand.
I've got a married guy like that. Totally weird. Why haven't they learnt how to kiss in 30 years of marriage?? WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIRRRRRRRD Mine is like a lizard.
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When they don't know how to kiss! Had one client stiffen his tongue, jab at mine and then waggle it up and down. It makes it more unpleasant than it has to be :/ He was married as well. I don't understand.
I've got a married guy like that. Totally weird. Why haven't they learnt how to kiss in 30 years of marriage?? WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIRRRRRRRD Mine is like a lizard.
I know! So confused about that! Maybe times are different because I would have had to teach my husband.
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Dirty or long fingernails. I have it on my profile now, short clean nails if they want to use them on me. I have had a few now come in and present hands to be inspected ;D.
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The worst kissers are those that lead with the tongue. Normal people go in with lips slightly parted and to be met by a protruding tongue is just... fucking ew!
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The worst kissers are those that lead with the tongue. Normal people go in with lips slightly parted and to be met by a protruding tongue is just... fucking ew!
This is so relevant to me right now.... :-X
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When they are getting a little bit enthusiastic on top and their sweat drips off their face and onto my face :-X
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Trying to hit my cervix really hard and then ENJOYING when I yell out in pain. Literally what kind of sick fuck? He left happy but there's not a chance I'm seeing him again.