Celest you always crack me up hhahahah

Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all week .....

.

Jane Dough, when we are chatting before we get down to business I always ask if they live in my town and always say if they ever see me out just ignore me. I say it to all newbies. I had one young regular I bumped into at the petrol station and he blatantly said hello. I ignored him, went and paid and he was hanging around outside filling his car up and when I came out he came towards me to say hello. I was fuming. I didn't say anything but when he called next, I banned him and told him why. He was so apologetic but no way I'd see the div again.

So I posted on here (find find the comment) about how I had put on my profile 'NOT TAKING BOOKINGS - If you message me and ask for a booking I will ignore your message'

after still receiving around 30 more messages asking for bookings I kinda had enough and replied to a few of them 'Please can you read my profile before contacting me. It states, very clearly, that I am not takin bookings at the moment'....


One of the cheeky fuckers replied 'clearly you can't read either cause it says that you won't reply... So are you free?'

so the fucker did read my profile thought he'd try his luck anyway!!! 🤬 🤬 🤬 🤬 🤬

Getting a huge increase in guys contacting me in the complete opposite way to stated on my profile, it seems if you ask them not to do a certain thing that's precisely what they will do!
 Pretty sure it is just to try and wind me up or maybe they think in these strange times we will accept any old shit despite what our profiles say.

I do GFE with hospitality and socialising and slow and gentle in the bedroom. Todays client wasn't very talkative and very physical. I had to prod him to get the business bit out of the way. Oh, and this was after he wanted to use the bathroom before paying so this was the second time of asking. He was really cock-centric which I don't like. He began asking question like how many I had seen today and how busy I am and I must make a lot and do I use drugs? I'm okay with giving BJs as a spontaenous thing if I'm in the mood for a tease but not on demand. I also don't like mens hands holding my head when I'm doing it. Yes I get men have fantasies and yes I get some men use pretty graphic terms for sexual activitives. I don't like the feeling I'm being "skullfucked". I'm fine with the odd spanka s a tease but not when I'm on edge with a man who isn't very social and who is too physical. He used up his full hour plus ten minutes because he arrived early. He left the spout up on the alchohol gel sanitiser bottle which I don't like because the whole point of the spout being down is to keep the alchohol from evaporating and making it useless. I only noticed this after he had left. I also noticed he had mistakenly (?) shortchanged me by counting out all the notes as if they were 20's but one was a 10. I'm very clear in both my profile and on the phone what I offer and what I like. When he came he tasted like utter cack and I spat this onto my arm in the hope I wouldn't get it all over my bed. I don't want to do that again. This entire list of what happened during this booking is like everything on my do-not-do list.

I had some suspicions when we were on the phone but nothing ringing alarm bells so I thought I could manage this call. I did manage this booking as things turned out but then I put my mind in different places and navigated my tension. The money being short does niggle. He decided I'm his new favourite in life so wants to see me again in a few weeks. I'm not overjoyed about this prospect. On reflection there's points of similarity with previous clients I dumped. Nothing huge which stands out noticeably but 2-3 of these things all at once.

I have a tagging scheme on my phone so I can tell at a glance who is calling and who they are (regular, timewaster, caution, blocked) and I give them a star rating from one to five. 5 star being VIP client I'm always happy to see. Three star acceptable. Two star don't see unless I'm desperate. I did mark him as  three star but felt this was pushing it so downgraded him to a two star. The thing is he's not a complete asshole. He respected my boundaries if I drew a line but it was the assumptions plus the fact I felt stressed so this booking ended up feeling like halfway between boundary pushing and griefing. I like to provide a very personal service and this wasn't anywhere near personal. After some more thinking I blocked him.

Sounds like a one star if youre being generous.

When they try to pick and choose services like they do pizza toppings..

Had a client arrive this morning, all good, polite enough. He says he knows I offer anal, but do not offer unprotected oral and he would like to switch the two. I didn't know what he meant, so he explained he will not have anal but he will have OWO... I was a bit taken aback and said I don't do oral without a condom.
He then tried to justify it by saying "Well you know.. it's like when you order a pizza, you can take off the anchovies but add pineapple!"

I didn’t realised at first how many clients I’ve seen who’ve done this, only noticed when the thought popped into my mind mid action, a lot of clients have smacked my arse whilst I’m giving them oral, Im usually kneeling at the side of them on the bed bent down, arse a little up so they can touch me, but a god few have smacked me and I just think your cock is in my mouth and you want to surprise hit me, don’t you think I could bite down in surprise! The last thing I would do is slap someone’s arse whilst my cock is between their teeth