Come in from the bathroom moaning that theres no hot water after running the tap for 2 secs. It's not magic you have to let it run a little longer 

Brilliant!

Why can't they close the bloody bathroom door when they are in there? I feel like their mother when I close it.

Had one this morning complaining that he was cold. He then said he's been at the local supermarket for an hour & a half.  He didn't have the common sense to ask for an earlier appointment, just thought he'd turn up 30 minutes early. So I made him wait. The communication skills & stupidty of these clowns amazes me. He also said he was expecting to see a personalised number plate in the hotel carpark with my working name on it.  Unbelievable, I wanted to ask if he's ever had a head trauma.

Lol...I honestly believe that the blood must run to Mens head when they come to an appointment & that mixed with nerves makes them extra stupid!!

Love the number plate idea he had!! Priceless!! Did you ask him why he thought this?xx

When they ask "When are you coming back to XYZ town?"

Occasionally I can actually answer them. Usually I can't. Sometimes I want to say "I won't be. Your town is shite."

Most annoying is when they ask if you'll be there next week and you say "Nope, I'm leaving Friday" and then they go "Awwww... that's such a shame. I really wanted to see you but I don't have a day off until Tuesday. Your pictures look so good. When do you think you'll be back? Where are you going next week?"

Sound dead lovely and 'normal' on the phone, then 30 mins before booking, they come out with all sorts of requests and texting 'do you do this, that and the other?' (usually very random)? No mention of it in conversation! Pass thanks, stop wasting my time 

Is it just me or does this irritate anyone else- when they call and say "Are you open? " What my mouth? My legs? My front door? I know they think they are calling a brothel. I explain its just me in my flat. A lot of them still don't seem to get it though. 

When they say will anyone else be there i get paranoid and think are they going to rob me cos they want me on my own. My hyperactive mind!