When you send the location and he never confirms an appointment turns up two hours later saying I’m here can you let me in. Don’t think I can. I’m in my pjs and ready to take a nap. God I swear some of these idiots genuinely must have this idea melted into their brain that escorts just sit around all day in lingerie and hair up and full face of makeup freshly showered and shaved and moisturised all over waiting for men to come in and penetrate us. I have a life too I’m not ready to see clients at the click of a button so annoying. Nothing pisses me off more in this world.

Lie (and be totally obvious about it.)

I recently had a reg booked in and his time came and went so I messaged asking if he was still coming. He said he'd tried to ring and text to confirm but as he didn't hear back, he thought that I'd forgotten about the meet. I had zero calls, zero texts. Nothing since we arranged it. He obviously chose to ignore the fact that all phones these days have records of texts and calls and in actuality, it was him that forgot. I'd rather he just say sorry Hannaah, I forgot!