I am seriously thinking of banning clients who are old enough to be my grandfather.

I had one yesterday who asked, midway through, whether I could give him more time (but, sorry, he didn't have any more money on him).  I was like   'Ooh yes, because I just like sucking your 80-year-old willy so much that I'll do it for free'.  He went for a pee mid-punt   leaving the bathroom door open whilst he did so, faffed around at the end of the appointment, took about a million years to get dressed then asked as he was leaving if he could have a discount next time  

I've just got rid of another one who, when he arrived, asked me for a cup of coffee 'because I always have a cup of coffee at 11'.  Fine, creature of habit, if you want to pay me for making you coffee, no problemo.  But he had it strong and black - have you ever smelt someone's breath after they've been drinking strong black coffee??!  Then he proceeded to 'kiss' me, which to him meant shoving his MASSIVE tongue in my mouth and slobbering all over me.  Then - and this is making me feel queasy - LICKED me non-stop for the hour.  I don't mean just oral, I mean licked my face, neck, boobs, arms and even at one point - when I sat up to reach for a condom - started licking my BACK.  Using the whole length of his tongue to give me big long sloppy licks all over.  Feel sick    Just scrubbed and scrubbed in the shower.  Best of it was, when I asked him for the money at the beginning of the appointment, he said - only half jokily - 'Do I have to pay?'

Sorry for the moan, just had to vent.  In both cases, I was lying there looking at their little spindly legs and walnut whip willies and just thinking 'I deserve more than what I've charged you for this.'

This whole post made me LOL

oh dear, luckily I havent had any around the 70/80 mark so I can only empathise lol
xxx

Yes, I'm laughing about it myself in retrospect  

Lucky you, for some reason I seem to attract the oldies?!  And the best of it is, they always make a point of saying that they picked me cos they don't want 'a 20-year-old'.  Fair enough but, hello, I'm only 38! Like 40 years your junior!

*Dry heaves*

I was someone's  80th birthday present once. Did not know that until I turned up and found him attached, (naked), to emphysema tanks.

Originally he had booked me for two hours but had brought the appointment forward and I had told him i could only do an hour.  Never had I been more glad.

2yrs later he put up a reverse booking asking for someone no more than 20!!! I'm 40 and that is bad enough.  Poor girls.

 

That's all I have to say!! To every word!!

 

I have some lovely older clients (70/80+) and have also met a few that have been a pain in the arse, but no more so than punters of any age. Likewise height, weight, race, nationality or anything else which groups people together.

I've certainly had whiny and petulant behaviour, bad kissing, dodgy breath and a few nasty surprises too over the years, although none as much of a shock as Pandora's must have been - I can only say that the fault there was squarely with whoever made the booking, and they should really have known better. None of the things mentioned here are age-specific - I don't want to be a killjoy and I know everybody likes a moan now and again, but I have to say I'm appalled by the tone of this thread. Poor show.

From what Pandora posted, it seems the older guy himself made the booking. And then he went on to post reverse bookings for 'someone no more than 20' ...So the fault(s) lay squarely at the actual client's door, IMO.

Unless I am misunderstanding.

No, I could have misunderstood too - I had assumed that a 'present' was normally from somebody, and maybe a friend or carer had made the appointment, especially since people with severe breathing difficulties usually aren't that shit hot on the phone. One of my more profoundly disabled clients has his assistant make bookings for him because his speech is impaired and he can't use the telephone effectively.

Either way, whoever it was should have explained the client's health problems, but this still has nothing to do with him being elderly. And I don't see what the reverse bookings have to do with anything - if the people specified don't want to bid, nobody's making them.

I am posting as a member not a moderator, and being a moderator does not remove my right to either have an opinion, or to express it. If anybody doesn't want to service a particular demographic of client that is entirely her own business, but to see them and then sneer and poke fun at them because of something they have no control over (rather than just the twatty behaviour, which is definitely fair game) is something I find distasteful; I wasn't talking about your OP specifically anyway, which ought to have been clear from my first post. As for the elderly punters, I'm sure nobody here 'joining in' has any trouble spending their money.

*Sits back with a bowl of popcorn*