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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2594805 times)

bbwlouise

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3285 on: 05 September 2012, 01:48:31 pm »
Yep I had that one also!

I had a classic one yesterday, call I do a deal if he makes me cum !

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3286 on: 05 September 2012, 02:59:22 pm »
Him



I would like to book you for an hour to play with your nipples and suck them until milk comes out.

Me (in a patient, giving mood today)

Hi,

Thanks for your message - I don't offer lactation services as I have never been pregnant. It's a common fetish though so I'm sure if you search through adultwork you'll find someone who does. Though I would advise you to google the risks associated with drinking a strangers breast milk.

Regards...

Him (five seconds later)

No no if I suck hard enough milk will come out, trust me.

I think he's mistaking blood for milk.... :-X

sadie x

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3287 on: 05 September 2012, 04:46:32 pm »
ive just been sick a little! :-[

Millicient

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3288 on: 05 September 2012, 07:03:36 pm »

A client wanted a booking, but he needed to be sure I understood the
five questions before proceeding.

1. He likes foot fetish, suck toes and would like a foot massage.

2. Will a blow job be given with or without a condom.

3. Would he be allowed to to go down using protection.

4. Do I have regular checks and to show the paperwork that I am clean.

5 He has this desire that a woman is giving him a bath whilst holding his

  penis while I pee, can this be incorporated into role play.

Honestly there are some right jerks out there, what's clients have said to you
that's a scream.

Millicent
Millicent x

pandora

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3289 on: 05 September 2012, 07:12:19 pm »

A client wanted a booking, but he needed to be sure I understood the
five questions before proceeding.

1. He likes foot fetish, suck toes and would like a foot massage.

2. Will a blow job be given with or without a condom.

3. Would he be allowed to to go down using protection.

4. Do I have regular checks and to show the paperwork that I am clean.

5 He has this desire that a woman is giving him a bath whilst holding his

  penis while I pee, can this be incorporated into role play.

Honestly there are some right jerks out there, what's clients have said to you
that's a scream.

Millicent

This one is doing the rounds

MsDee

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3290 on: 05 September 2012, 08:06:33 pm »
Yep I had that one also!

I had a classic one yesterday, call I do a deal if he makes me cum !

Oh I had a champion today....

Is the service free if he makes me cum?

I replied... Sweety you pay me to fake that you managed to please me. Only real men make me cum!

sadie x

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3291 on: 05 September 2012, 08:57:36 pm »
just had

u3?
gets me so irratated!!! ;D

bbwlouise

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3292 on: 06 September 2012, 06:29:10 pm »
Just had this one! Needless to say I declined lol

I know this is short notice but i am at a loose end and need a fuck could you do a car meet now ish

Ruby Reid And Alex

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3293 on: 06 September 2012, 09:00:39 pm »
We've just spent our evening dealing with a guy who's come across quite timewaster-like in his many many (very short and txt speak) AW messages to us (he also repeatedly messaged us a few days ago wanting to meet right then - gone midnight - and asking absolutely everything), we agreed to meet him around 10:30pm as he wanted our latest time but he continued pestering about this, that and the other detail - seemed very paranoid about being found out seeing an escort etc, and didn't want to text us when he arrived to get our house number as then we'd get his phone number (oh noes!).

One thing that really bugged me was him asking if we'd seen anyone else today, I wanted to tell him it was none of his business and that we would be clean and fresh before his booking anyway but he insisted on knowing so James sent him a message saying we had seen another client but we are discrete so don't discuss details. He then said "well can i cum now?? x" and we said no, we have stuff to do and then need to get ready so if he must come over earlier then 10pm is the best we can do. The following was our final exchange before he was blocked:

Him: plans changed wanted sooner :( x
Us: So are you cancelling tonight's booking entirely, or is 10pm ok?
Him: sorry gta cancel due to changed plans really sorry 4 any loss x
Us: No worries, thanks anyway. *Adds to blocked senders list*

Good riddance - he was exhibiting almost all the timewaster warning signs in the book and we were fed up of dealing with someone who was unlikely to arrive. Should've blocked after his first message on Saturday night:

"hi iam a bi curious man and no another bi curious man and we wanna meet cn
we have fun with u and each other at yours is this possible?? x"

ilovedots

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3294 on: 06 September 2012, 09:03:16 pm »
Just had this on the phone:

Him: Hello darling!
Me: Hello.
Him: Do you suck dick?
Me: I beg your pardon?
Him: Do you suck dick? I mean do you give head?
Me: *puts the phone down*

He is still trying to call me and sent a message "when are you next available and where do you live? Do you have anyone to have a ffm 3sum? As I've always wanted one."

Oh dear lord, give me strength!
Yes, I'd risk it for a biscuit, as I said, you know me.

strawberry

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3295 on: 06 September 2012, 09:06:32 pm »
"I'm phoning for sex wanna shag you"
"Ok, you'll need to make an appointment"
"How much is it?"
"Depends how long you want to book, 1 hour costs ?140 at my place in xxxxxx"
"Oh, errr" (something about his accent and wording made me think he wasn't local or travelling my way)
"Where are you?"
"Manchester"
"I'm 80 miles away were you aware of this?"
"Uh goodbye, goodbye"

Friday

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3296 on: 06 September 2012, 09:14:11 pm »
"hello this is Friday"
"..is that the escort?"
"yes..this is the Escort  ::)"
"how much is half an hour?"
"where did you get my number from?
"the website.."
"well the website tells you it's minimum 1 hour"
"how much is that then.."
"the website also tells you it's ?100"
*he hangs up*

lol what a charmer

also the most obvious timewaster ever! If you are going to tell stories at east get it straight before you call! hotel meet at 6pm..after he's dropped his wife off at work (also asked if I minded that he was married  ::) ) already has the room number and it's "24"...hmm try harder... Yes at 6pm I was enjoying my dinner not turning up at a city centre hotel wondering why there is not a 24...unsurprisingly he was looking for me either  ::)

strawberry

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3297 on: 06 September 2012, 09:21:53 pm »
Forgot about one earlier;

"Who's this?"
"Who are you wanting to speak to?"
"Is this Tracey?"
"No"
"Uh who is it then?"
"Who are you wanting to speak to?"
"Err who are you?"
"Look what are you phoning for then?"
"Errrr"

I was tempted to introduce myself as a hairdresser or something but I'm not that unhelpful, really. ::)  :D.

 ::)

Ruby Reid And Alex

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3298 on: 06 September 2012, 09:56:25 pm »
Lol, looks like all the idiots are out tonight!

We just had another one ourselves:

Him: R u free??
Us: Sorry, too late for a booking this evening (blurb about our booking process)
Him: K no thanks please erase number x

Well, no actually we keep all our messages so then we know that you bugged us before!

Friday

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #3299 on: 08 September 2012, 12:40:40 am »
Just got this email...

"You are hilarious. You should be paying to fuck me!!!"

weird thing is.. I have had zero contact with this guy, most random email ever  ::)