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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2594792 times)

Coty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2445 on: 07 March 2012, 08:13:24 pm »
FOAD...lmao....love love love it:-)  I'm using that from now on!

ilovedots

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2446 on: 07 March 2012, 08:16:58 pm »
So am I ;) Love the video too!

Yes, I'd risk it for a biscuit, as I said, you know me.

ladyjennaj

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2447 on: 07 March 2012, 11:32:45 pm »
I've had the most irritating client on my case this week. He made an appointment, which he shortly cancelled afterwards because he said it was 'too far.' It turns out he's only 5 minutes from me. He has been texting all week - and I haven't replied once :-\ - saying that he's got a tonne of champagne and wants me to help him drink it, blah blah blah. Obviously a fantasist. I told him to get a grip and pester someone else, and then he asks if he can book an overnight?!  :FF

sara1980

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2448 on: 07 March 2012, 11:54:01 pm »
Wow. A couple of 'trial sessions'. Just Wow!  :FF

Please forgive my random email to you.

I am looking for something in particular which may or may not be of interest to you, if it is not of interest I apologise in advance for this message, if it is of interest please do not hesitate to get in touch.

I am looking to start a regular meeting with one person who is ideally based in Newcastle or the surrounding area. The meetings will be fairly frequent and consistent. To begin with however it will need to comprise of a couple of 15 minute appointments in order to determine if we are right for each other.

I am hoping for a very long term agreement with one person only hense the need for a couple of 'trial' sessions prior to a more guaranteed set up.

Ideally I would like to try different sexual experiences so if you are open to lots of different things that would be appealing.

If any of this appeals please do let me know. Ideally I am looking for a combination of low price first few visits, (higher) set price thereafter with a plethora of new experiences to be had and a happy friendly person to meet.

If this long term opportunity is of interest to you please do come back to me.

Thanks,

Deluded twat who is just asking to be told to FOAD.

(Thanks Jodie  ;D )

ilovedots

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2449 on: 08 March 2012, 03:05:40 pm »
Hi Alice, I sent an sms earlier today. Please accept my apologies for being too cowardly to phone. Is owo ok once you have checked that I am clean? ??? :FF
Yes, I'd risk it for a biscuit, as I said, you know me.

foreign affairs

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2450 on: 08 March 2012, 06:13:57 pm »
New message from AW

Hi, I was just looking at your ad and have to say you are very attractive I?m 21 and a student and I was just wondering if you maybe did student discounts haha. I?m not sure but I was thinking you might like have a hot young boy toy to have fun with hehe x
 
Another deluded male escort ::) I'm not into kids ;D

Kinky Starlet

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2451 on: 08 March 2012, 11:24:26 pm »
New message from AW

Hi, I was just looking at your ad and have to say you are very attractive I?m 21 and a student and I was just wondering if you maybe did student discounts haha. I?m not sure but I was thinking you might like have a hot young boy toy to have fun with hehe x
 
Another deluded male escort ::) I'm not into kids ;D

I got this one today too. Replied and said he'd be better off asking for his discount in his local ann summers and buying a toy. Better value for money and will last longer.
You can't control the wind.....but you can adjust your sails!

JulietteTV

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2452 on: 09 March 2012, 01:10:38 pm »
Caller: 'So how many times can I cum?'
Me: 'I've no idea you'll have to answer that question yourself'

 :FF ???

EvaBeeva

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2453 on: 09 March 2012, 05:20:13 pm »
I get that as well^

I think its down to men going to parlours and discovering to their dismay they have to pay extra for extra cum's. 

The cheapskates.
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused

JulietteTV

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2454 on: 09 March 2012, 05:33:49 pm »
I get that as well^

I think its down to men going to parlours and discovering to their dismay they have to pay extra for extra cum's. 

The cheapskates.

Such a ridiculous question to ask when you apparently only want to pay for a 30 minute session anyway! How much ejaculation do they normally expect to happen during that short a length of time? The mind boggles.

EvaBeeva

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2455 on: 09 March 2012, 05:49:24 pm »
How much ejaculation do they normally expect to happen during that short a length of time? The mind boggles.

 ;D ;D ;D  I don't think I want to imagine that actually..   :-X
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused

Liverbird

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  • Shine on you crazy diamond...
Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2456 on: 09 March 2012, 10:55:25 pm »
Idiot: "I'm just having a look at your pictures and wanted to let you know I'm having a ..."

Me: "Oooh that's nice, well enjoy your evening!"
[I hang up promptly]

I still can't shake my polite telephone voice when saying this though...  :FF

 ;D ;D ;D
I had a guy call today, worked his way up to asking for bareback. Had a quietly spoken, very polite voice and before I knew it, I had replied in that same polite, telephone voice.
Soon as the call ended I thought 'shame on me', why didn't I give him a hard time?
Saturation of the brain maybe???
W.x

River

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2457 on: 10 March 2012, 09:09:38 am »
Caller: 'So how many times can I cum?'
"It's up to you sweety.
But you must tell me and write the figure on the whiteboard with a marker-pen
then keep to it.
Oh, also you have to cum each time I tell you....at the end of a five second countdown"
   :o
I really say this.  8)

JulietteTV

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2458 on: 10 March 2012, 09:23:12 am »
Caller: 'So how many times can I cum?'
"It's up to you sweety.
But you must tell me and write the figure on the whiteboard with a marker-pen
then keep to it.
Oh, also you have to cum each time I tell you....at the end of a five second countdown"
   :o
I really say this.  8)

And the sad reality is they'll probably barely only manage one 'cum' before they call it quits despite all the talk!

River

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2459 on: 10 March 2012, 09:59:08 am »
And they have the 'post-orgasm' second thought regrets
and can't get their clothes on and out the front door fast enough?
I totally love that bit too.  ;D