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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2594840 times)

River

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2355 on: 17 February 2012, 01:42:40 pm »
Which nicely lead onto my fav current joke.
It's about dogs and sex so sorta on-topic...

Two dogs are walking down the road.
Dog 1 says to the other dog: "Do you use contraception?"
Dog 2 replies: "Durex"
To which Dog 1 responds: "Hey, I asked you first"   
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RedLady1991

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2356 on: 17 February 2012, 06:17:23 pm »
""I read your profile, and emailed you, would like a free booking if i left you feedback and field report to boost your profile, i could cover travel cost, i could also make a video for you to put on a,w if you wanted, i wouldn't want to keep it or be in it. Basicly im a nice clean healthy guy just skint. Im sorry if im cheeky, your profile said discounts at your discretion x""

Youd like a free booking? Id like to not be skint and to have decent clients but life doesnt work like that :FF
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Coty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2357 on: 17 February 2012, 09:55:38 pm »
Quote from: JodieTs on 17 February 2012, 01:42:40 pm
Which nicely lead onto my fav current joke.
It's about dogs and sex so sorta on-topic...

Two dogs are walking down the road.
Dog 1 says to the other dog: "Do you use contraception?"
Dog 2 replies: "Durex"
To which Dog 1 responds: "Hey, I asked you first"

LMAO...I didn't get it until I read it out loud! Doh!
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JulietteTV

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2358 on: 17 February 2012, 10:13:51 pm »
'Hi,
I am a 26 year old straight male, who has recently developed a thing for TV/TS Girls. I have no problems with women, so am slightly reluctant to pay for services! whowever im finding it hard to meet TV's for fun, and am curious if youd offer a mutual meet or reduced rate for a fit 26 year old??

I could accommodate, but also travel and but would be ready for both passive and active fun today. if interested, send me a message and ill forward you my email and some pics.

Thanks'

'Mutual meets' and 'special rates' for fit 26 year olds! I don't see the relevance of forwarding his email and pics. Why do so many decide that advertising personal services is akin to offering a free dating service? Do they really think you advertise as an escort on the off-chance that you could find the ideal date!?!

« Last Edit: 17 February 2012, 10:16:09 pm by Juliette »
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River

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2359 on: 18 February 2012, 05:34:26 pm »
Phone rings today.
A 'No Show' & loads of previous N.s's and wank-texts.
He asks for an appointment for 3 hours from now.
I agree, but figure it's another N.s after which I'll block him.

Anyway, he later rings from my staging point (3 minutes from my flat)
Then turns up looking well groomed and rather attractive.
He then suggests he sorts out the money and promptly pays me!
 
Then follows a really hot session
(you know those one in thirty sessions which are actually a delight rather than 'just work') 
He is on the edge most of the time & I'm thinking
"please don't cum yet"  yes, it was that good.
Eventually he cums all over my tits.

After cleaning up, I offer him a cuppa which he accepts.
He then goes into relaxed post orgasm relaxed mode
which is normally ideal as a wind down.  Not for you matie.
After a couple of minutes I say to him:
"I hope you don't mind me asking this and please don't take offence,
but while you are drinking the tea, is it OK if I suck your willy?" 
Then follows another hot time.
He later dresses and I come up to him, stroke his back
run my nose along his shoulder and breath in.
Oh why can't every job be like this.
He has to leave and the session is almost over. Well 45 minutes in.

Total timewaster turns into dream client.
My head is spinning.
« Last Edit: 23 January 2017, 11:50:52 pm by River »
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Rooby

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2360 on: 18 February 2012, 05:55:38 pm »
Quote from: JodieTs on 18 February 2012, 05:34:26 pm
Total timewaster turns into dream client.
My head is spinning.

Thats like a Prossie Fairytale!! Brilliant, it's (almost) restored my faith in men  ;D

R xx
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Coty

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2361 on: 18 February 2012, 07:23:05 pm »
Quote from: Rooby on 18 February 2012, 05:55:38 pm
Quote from: JodieTs on 18 February 2012, 05:34:26 pm
Total timewaster turns into dream client.
My head is spinning.

Thats like a Prossie Fairytale!! Brilliant, it's (almost) restored my faith in men  ;D

R xx

Agreed! Wow, lucky Jodie:-)
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improbablecats

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2362 on: 18 February 2012, 10:24:09 pm »
Quote from: JodieTs on 18 February 2012, 05:34:26 pm
Phone rings today.
A 'No Show' from 12 months ago. 
(My index card says he has made loads of previous N.s's and wank-texts.)
He asks for an appointment for 3 hours from now.
I agree, but figure it's another N.s after which I'll block him.

Anyway, he later rings from my staging point (3 minutes from my flat)
Then turns up looking well groomed and rather attractive.
He then suggests he sorts out the money and promptly pays me!
 
Then follows a really hot session
(you know those one in thirty sessions which are actually a delight rather than 'just work') 
He is on the edge most of the time & I'm thinking
"please don't cum yet"  yes, it was that good.
Eventually he cums all over my tits.

After cleaning up, I offer him a cuppa which he accepts.
He then goes into relaxed post orgasm relaxed mode
which is normally ideal as a wind down.  Not for you matie.
After a couple of minutes I say to him:
"I hope you don't mind me asking this and please don't take offence,
but while you are drinking the tea, is it OK if I suck your willy?" 
Then follows another hot time.
He later dresses and I come up to him, stroke his back
run my nose along his shoulder and breath in.
Oh why can't every job be like this.
He has to leave and the session is almost over. Well 45 minutes in.

Total timewaster turns into dream client.
My head is spinning.

Goodness! I'm glad this turned up trumps for you, Jods. :D
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River

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2363 on: 19 February 2012, 01:50:03 am »
Thanks.
A real turn up for the books.

My next booking today was a regular.
When he was fifteen minutes late I phoned him.
Difficult to hear him talk, as there was lots of noise
and official sounding voice over a tannoy, I think.
"I'll explain another time.  I'm in a police station"
I guess not a suspect/prisoner as he still had his phone.
Pity he didn't make it as he is also a very yummy client
so that would have been nice.
Oh well.   :-\
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RedLady1991

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2364 on: 19 February 2012, 03:51:28 am »
Cant have everything jodie...seems like you already had an amazing day!! Good on you :)
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Kristina Bristol Escort

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2365 on: 19 February 2012, 04:17:17 pm »
 Jodie's post just proove how unpredictable men can be sometimes!
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Kristina Bristol Escort

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2366 on: 19 February 2012, 06:43:30 pm »
Him - can you do half an hour for ?60.00 because it is so far to travel
Me - No

Find someone closer surely there is a lady between me and bath x
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ladyjennaj

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2367 on: 19 February 2012, 06:44:55 pm »
Quote from: Kristina Bristol Escort on 19 February 2012, 06:43:30 pm
Him - can you do half an hour for ?60.00 because it is so far to travel
Me - No

Find someone closer surely there is a lady between me and bath x

I hate guys like those! Why travel if they can't afford it? Why not find a guy closer? Idiot!

I actually had a guy ask me to travel from London to Inverness, Scotland for a 1 hour outcall yesterday - what the hell? :FF!
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Kristina Bristol Escort

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2368 on: 19 February 2012, 07:11:24 pm »
Well that beats my record of someone asking me on Saturday evening if I would do an out call to Launceston Cornwall for 1 hour.  Giving that I am in Bristol I declined.

I also have someone who has made a booking this week for a 3 hour incall he is coming from Liverpool specially to see me - I am not holding my breath!
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ladyjennaj

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #2369 on: 19 February 2012, 07:49:48 pm »
God  >:(

Mind you, some guys do come from far away to see me, but they are a rarity...
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