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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2599946 times)

BibiofLeeds

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10395 on: 01 November 2016, 11:04:26 am »
I once had a bloke ring and tell me he wanted a whore for the evening.I said I beg your pardon!?! He repeated himself but less cocky second time and I just said yes that's what I thought you said and I put the phone down.

LadyOfTheNight

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10396 on: 03 November 2016, 02:15:24 pm »
Text I want you to come squirt on me whilst my wife is at work

Given the circumstances I'm currently dealing with he's lucky I didn't find out who he was, then offer him a medieval punishment such as hanging, drawing and quartering....

Aqua Allegoria

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10397 on: 03 November 2016, 03:57:22 pm »
When a guy calls saying he read my profile and he just *loves* it.
Then he asks about my age...
Then about where I am from...
Then about my size...
Then he says he would like a 30' relaxed and unrushed GFE and he wants to be sure he will get his FULL TIME... :FF :FF :FF

For fuck's sake why didn't I just hang up? He ruined my mood.


LadyOfTheNight

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10398 on: 03 November 2016, 07:01:14 pm »
Wtf are all the wierdos out post Halloween?

Email asking for availability.......I send my general info.........Next emails:

OK hun do u offer a quick bj services  x    ermm I clearly state minimum 1 HOUR!!! so I don't respond then another email

hi hun would u mind giving me a bath x

What the fuck is wrong with these guys?

VoluptuousCurves

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10399 on: 04 November 2016, 01:30:18 pm »
Another bloody essay  :FF

Quote
"[my tagline]"......Mmmm!

Well! With an opening like THAT! It's no wonder I had you saved in my Hotlist sometime ago. Lol! But there were some other attributes about you that sealed the deal! ?..Wink! Wink! 😉

Why! Excuse my manners. Hi! I'm xxx and feel like I have died and gone to heaven.
You look and sound like my perfect woman in Every way. Your Highly Alluring! Sexy Sensual and Erotic demeanour has me captivated and  mesmerised. But apart from your very sexy shapely body, its our mutual love and attraction of nylon stockings, or even Better! Nylon Tights!.... I spent some time perusing Sexy, Erotic, Raunchy pics! and vids!  Well! You Hit the spot. You've made me Very Horny indeed.Add to that the involuntary twitching that I'm experiencing. ....Mmmm!   I'm pretty sure you can get me to do things that I haven't even dreamed of?... Wink! Wink!.. Lol!

I'm a discrete, trustworthy, very hygienic, respectable gent with  a Naughty! But Very Very Nice side. A Horny Lil Devil! In the Right company. Lol!  But my biggest turn on is women in nylon/opaque stockings or better nylon / opaque  Knickerless Tights! .......Man drives me Wild! And may I say. You look absolutely sexy as hell in....Mmmm! I love being teased or seduced  (intentionally or unintentionally ) as a women sits opposite maybe on a train, office waiting room, restaurant, home setting (the list goes on ) as she slowly crosses and uncrosses her sexy nylon clad legs so that her dress rides up over her shapely thighs, giving me a sneaky upskirt view of the gems that lies beneath?...Or maybe you are bending over to look for or pick something up.  As you do so, I get a glimpse if your dress/ skirt gliding up over the back of your sexy stocking /tights adorned legs, and continue riding up over your voluptuous curvy derrier! ....Mmmmm! The thought. I have a thing for womens pretty painted toes also. So sitting crossed legged and dangling her shoe or wearing peep toe heels is another thing that sends me Crazy! Ps.(You have beautiful feet also! Among other things?  Wink! Wink!)
I love roleplay and most definitely love your vids. Right up my street. Their just the type of scenarios I like. I love the ones  with you being caught wanking then fucked in your tights. You playing with yourself through your tights getting aroused and very wet! But I particularly love the hotel manager one! I'd love to do something like that with you or even more raunchy.? But the idea of seeing you in tights, heels figure hugging or any dress of your liking with no bra!. (I do like seeing the shape of natural tits and Nipples through a woman's garments. Also gives an indication of how turned on they maybe among other things. ?) BIG turn on and has me thinking if so many scenarios qe can indulfe in?...Mmmmm!!
I'd love the idea of scenario similar to that and being able to pull up your dress or skirt to reveal your knickerless tights and then??....... Well you tell me what you would like to happen next?.....Wink! Wink!

From your profile  I see you will be touring in London next week. (Christmas has definitely cum early. Lol!)  Well I would love the oppurtunity to indulge in your Decadent! Unadulterated! Erotic delights! Making some of my raunchy fantasies become realities.

So if I've stirred a lil ounce of intrigue in you (and I really hope I have) please get back to me so we can arrange a time and possibly discuss details of our meet further. I most definitely don't want to miss you.
So please get back to me at your convenience and we can take it from there.

Feel free to contact me on my mobile:- xxx if you don't get through just leave a message or text saying who you are (I will definitely remember you :0 ) and I'll get back to you as soon as I'm free to do so.

I do hope I've passed your vetting process Lol! .. Very much look forward to hearing from you soon.

I Eagerly Await!

My reply:

Thanks for your email. You can arrange an appointment for next week by using the AW booking system.

100% certain he will never book, since his literary outpourings give him all the stimulation he'll ever need  ::)
And me, I am not a mess, I am a wilderness, yes
The undiscovered continent for you to undress

VoluptuousCurves

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10400 on: 04 November 2016, 04:20:18 pm »
This idiot has tried to book me 4 times. Twice he's asked for a quickie and I've said OK, ?50 and its not full service. He's then said oh please do full service, and BTW I've only got ?40 on me. Obviously I've refused. He phoned again today asking for half an hour, now he's texted me saying he's at the station, oh but could I do a full service quickie for ?40. Just sent him this

You've never had 15 mins with me, because you've made an excuse every time that you don't have enough cash. What do you even get out if this? Are you just masturbating over the idea of finding a sex worker who's so desperate to pay her rent that she'll accept your haggling? Because if so, you need help.
And me, I am not a mess, I am a wilderness, yes
The undiscovered continent for you to undress

Cat_BBW

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10401 on: 04 November 2016, 04:29:33 pm »
This idiot has tried to book me 4 times. Twice he's asked for a quickie and I've said OK, ?50 and its not full service. He's then said oh please do full service, and BTW I've only got ?40 on me. Obviously I've refused. He phoned again today asking for half an hour, now he's texted me saying he's at the station, oh but could I do a full service quickie for ?40. Just sent him this

You've never had 15 mins with me, because you've made an excuse every time that you don't have enough cash. What do you even get out if this? Are you just masturbating over the idea of finding a sex worker who's so desperate to pay her rent that she'll accept your haggling? Because if so, you need help.

 ;D

MissBehaving

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10402 on: 04 November 2016, 04:46:47 pm »
By mail at midnight , these are just the bullet points of the exchange ...

Him : do you have any availability today during the day
Me  : yes I have , I am available at 11am , or after 3pm
Him : Great , I can't wait to meet you , I'm thinking of 12.30 .

Now which part of 11am or after 3pm he couldn't manage to comprehend  is behond me .... After a few more sentence we agreed  on 5pm . But of course like 99% of inquiries made in the middle of the night he failed to place the booking as requested and  I didn't hear back  from him  ;D

Shewolf

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10403 on: 04 November 2016, 04:55:26 pm »
VC...not sure (wink wink) why you would not want to see that man (mmmmmm!)

He sounds (mmmmm!) great! (wink wink!).

FFS.

hahahahaaaaa IRRITATING AS HELL.

martine21

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10404 on: 04 November 2016, 09:47:18 pm »
Another bloody essay  :FF

My reply:

Thanks for your email. You can arrange an appointment for next week by using the AW booking system.

100% certain he will never book, since his literary outpourings give him all the stimulation he'll ever need  ::)

Any man that refers to himself as 'a horny lil devil' wants shooting IMO  ;D :FF

Aqua Allegoria

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10405 on: 04 November 2016, 10:44:30 pm »
This morning a poor sad moron simply texted me an...address  :FF

Followed by (5 min later) : "outcall" without question mark ???

BlaqHarlot

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10406 on: 05 November 2016, 01:28:43 am »
Earlier today

"hi I wanna book you this eve but I have my two kids for the weekend. I can put em in the other room and put the telly on and we can fuck downstairs?"

Wow! Blocked!

Shewolf

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10407 on: 05 November 2016, 05:13:45 pm »
Earlier today

"hi I wanna book you this eve but I have my two kids for the weekend. I can put em in the other room and put the telly on and we can fuck downstairs?"

Wow! Blocked!

I would have had to reply 'no thanks Super Dad'

Aqua Allegoria

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10408 on: 05 November 2016, 10:05:28 pm »
By text a few minutes ago:

"I am alone in my motel room on m61 and the bed is big..."

Yayyyy David Lynch is texting me!!! That's just awesome!!!!

Lucie268

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #10409 on: 06 November 2016, 12:02:45 am »
Quote
Hi.

I am a 43yo married guy in a sexless marriage and I want a spark back in my life with someone who knows the meaning of discretion (hence why I looked on here) Had an account here years back but it seems to have expired.

I am not looking to set up a one off meeting as a client but more of an ongoing FWB relationship where I will treat you to gifts each time I visit.

I have an online account with very.co.uk and I would like to treat you from there (plus other online/high street shopping)

I can't meet up very often due to my home life, but if we could spend 2 or 3hrs together every couple of months, I would get you to send me details of goods you wish to the value of ?200 - ?250 which I would order and bring with me to our meet.

I would also pay for any expenses occured, or if you wished for any food/drink during our time spent together.

This is a 100% genuine message and if you are interested at all then get back to me and we can discuss the details.

If it's of no interest, then thanks very much for reading anyway.

Xxx
 

Um. Bring cash, asshat.