Hi I want to meet tonight at my hotel. But I want really to do cocaine with you. Have incredible cocaine and just want someone to do it with. Can we sort that out? What sort of cost would that be. Many thanks x

fuck off 

Lol was that last night - I got that as well

I directed a potential client (tw) to my website only to be told his computer had blocked the site...

This wannabe straight male escort emailed me this morning.

'Hi I just joined adult work would you be interested in doing a male and female duo ? Also if you give me a rate I will give you a rate too ?
I'm new and your the first person that came up so I was wondering if you can help me out ? Please

If you want I will provide a free of charge one hour service for you ?'



hahahahahhhahahaa he's offering a free hour in exchange for feedback. Not to mention the fact I say on my profile I'm not interested in any duos with male escorts.

good luck mate

 ...sorry to text you , tired of making calls and getting my request rejected . I want to suck your tits really hard most escorts have said no is that something you allow ?
... my reply, maybe they don't want to be in pain had you considered that?
 I don't want my breasts in pain by hard sucking either .
 

Is it just me who receives messages from guys who want to "hang out the back of you"? I get them regularly, it's an expression that makes me shudder!

Latest one today:

Subject: hi

Message: mmmmmm i wanna be balls deep hangin out the back of u baby




How tempting.

Ow what.. Surely these dudes never manage to get a booking?!
I had one last night, 2am: "How far from the airport are u, I could be fucking u in ten minus"
Mmm, yeah sure pal. Glad I was counting sheep at the time 

This wannabe straight male escort emailed me this morning.

'Hi I just joined adult work would you be interested in doing a male and female duo ? Also if you give me a rate I will give you a rate too ?
I'm new and your the first person that came up so I was wondering if you can help me out ? Please

If you want I will provide a free of charge one hour service for you ?'



hahahahahhhahahaa he's offering a free hour in exchange for feedback. Not to mention the fact I say on my profile I'm not interested in any duos with male escorts.

good luck mate

These emails always crack me up, the best one of its kind I've had to date was from "a extremely successful male esort" who claimed that he had several famous female clients as regular clientele (of course this was the reason why he had 0 feedback; his clients couldn't leave feedback as their fame meant that they had to be discreet) after a lot of waffling on about how amazing, gorgeous and well hung a stud he was he proceeded to make me the offer of my life... His hourly outcall rate was ?20 higher than mine, however he really wanted to see me and not only would I have the night of my life, I could learn a lot from him and if I was up to scratch he could get in touch with famous clients who would be great customers for me. So he was willing to see me and not charge me, not even the ?20 extra for his hourly rate... I kid you not.
When I'd finished laughing I politely declined, as famous people tend to be the same as normal people and I'm not impressed by fame and I'm happy exchanging my services for cash.
He didn't take it too well. Bless.

Him: I'm near Gatwick, and I've only got ?20, but if you're feeling generous or horny I'd love to see you
R xxx"     (I charge ?150 per hour and Gatwick is 45 mins away.)

Me: No, but thanks for the laugh.

Him: Your welcome xx you know what they say, don't ask, don't get! Xxxxxx

Me: Sure. Alternatively; don't ask, don't make yourself look like a massive cunt.

Him: I'm reporting you for foul language.


I know I shouldn't have risen to it and there are better ways of dealing with these things. Etc. But more importantly who, how, where and why are the bad language police? I feel like I really need to know