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Author Topic: How not to book an escort,world championships!  (Read 2595120 times)

Fabulassie

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7335 on: 09 June 2015, 05:40:12 pm »
he has a reverse booking up for the same thing.  ?6000 a month "wage" i think it was with a card to be topped up with ?35k to be spent on nice things.  the wage was for rent and bills etc, but you were to spoil yourself on the card hahahaha.  was a VERY wordy RB too.

I've been way from escorting for a year due to illness, just got myself sorted and popped a new AW profile up ... first message I get is 2000+ words (I shit you not) from someone claiming to offer a 35k monthly salary, with the most ridiculous list of rules about How To Spend it. Oh and a very generous week's holiday every three months.  ::) That laugh was worth waiting for.


Could you, ah, give a postcode within a 10-mile radius of it so we can all have a laugh?
PLEASE-OH-PLEASE share this!!!!

littleminxjennifer

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7336 on: 09 June 2015, 05:49:16 pm »
i can't see it now, but pretty sure it was londoncentric.


Curvygal

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7337 on: 10 June 2015, 12:10:14 pm »
I know we get ones all the time that don't even know who we are but something about this really made me laugh.

'Hi I'm xxxx where are you based and how busty are you and what is your name?'

victoryrose

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7338 on: 10 June 2015, 12:21:11 pm »
I have three different rates for three different kinds of services spanning from social to full on sex stuff. The upsides of this is that I get a hell of a lot of social bookings which I enjoy. The downside of this is getting people like the idiot I got today that wanted to "massage me all over" but "not in intimate places" thereby not meeting the requirement to pay full rate but still getting to cop a nice feel. ...Right then. The cherry on the cake was his asking for half an hour, pushing the rate down to ?30. Blocked him, and I'm very seriously considering removing these "halfway" services altogether despite the good rep they've given me. If people can only just get their heads around why I might not want to offer OWO, it'll take them a long long time to understand that cuddling doesn't involve fingering me, for fuck's sake.

AliceRed

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7339 on: 10 June 2015, 12:37:30 pm »
I'm Manchester-based, not sure what the postcode for the RB is as he just messaged me the whole thing. I suggest settling in with a glass of wine before reading.  :P  Like, bloody hell love, half the appeal of this job is being self-employed.

Quote
Hello. I've decided to update my reverse booking as I don't feel certain parts of it were clear enough nor did I really ask the right questions or enough. There are a few subtle changes throughout and it's probably best you read through again to make sure that you are happy with them, if this is the first time you've seen this, then don't worry about all that, keep reading and hopefully this is for you. I've been really busy over the last few weeks with work so really haven't had the chance too see anyone so I thought it was unfair too start until i'm ready to commit as much time to this as yourself.

Summary: Salary ?7700 + ?35000 allowance + perks (transport, accommodation, surgery)

Thank you for taking the time to read this and hopefully you're happy being the girl who joins me on this fantastic journey. This is going to be a long read, so please make sure you read the entire thing before responding. If you aren't happy with anything or would like to tweak things slightly please feel free to contact me also as I can be quite flexible to a certain extent for the right girl.

I'll start with a brief summary and then hopefully be able to answer most of your questions as we continue, of course if you do have any questions at the end feel free to message me. However hopefully you feel confident enough in what you have read to bid and we can take this journey together.

This would be an exclusive arrangement between us, in very simple terms I pay you an amount of money each month, of course with a few bonuses that I shall explain later and in return you see me as often as you can and only me. The base salary would be ?7700 per month, with an allowance of up too ?35000, this will be explained in more detail later :)

What I'm looking for is a girl who is ideally under 35, somebody who doesn't take life too seriously, who's trust worthy and who understands that things that make you happy are worth the effort. I'm not looking for a certain size or shape, I'm just looking for somebody who is happy to make the effort and can have a great time with both in and out of the bedroom. Somebody who's open and honest with me and understands that this job is not just to keep me happy but too enjoy yourself as well. I don't want a girl who's catch phrase is "whatever you want" I'd much rather somebody who has some idea of the things that make them happy and isn't scared to act on it.

I understand at first it may be a little confusing why I would be offering what's essentially a lot of money for this, however I'm not looking for a bargain price, I'm looking too make the girl's life who's going on this journey with me better wherever I can. I'm a very firm believer that a happy, more relaxed girl is a far better lover and company, I find most girls are a lot happier when they are not only debt free but wearing things they love and don't have to worry about the next job or how they will cope if anything unexpected comes up, or maybe it's because you can just slow the pace down and enjoy the little things more.

So I should probably at this point talk about myself, I'm in my early 30s and have made my money initially in property but primarily in the IT sector as a consultant after selling my company a few years ago. I'm a very laid back, honest and open person, who after a nasty divorce and lots of changes in my life is trying to find a girl who's fun to be around and spend time with. Without the fuss and guessing game that comes from a normal relationship. This is one of the many reasons I have chosen AW to try and find the right person, as I don't want a girl just looking for a free meal, I'm looking for somebody who wants to enjoy every aspect that this and I have too offer.

Somebody who understands that her job is not just too have sex with me but too make yourself happy too, I'm always going to choose the girl who visibly makes an effort for me. The type of girl who always makes sure she looks her best around me, who gives more than one word answers, who gets that this arrangement is about more than just you or me, it's about the both of us. Hopefully that's you! In regards to my sexual requirements, I'm not looking for anything too crazy, I am very talented in the bedroom as I'm sure you can see from my feedback and like to spoil a girl.

Right, now too the maths bit, you will be paid a base salary of ?7700 a month, this is your money to do what you want with (I'd suggest you save what's left after bills) and will be paid at the start of our arrangement and then every month after that until we decide to end it. You will also be entitled to an allowance, which a few restrictions, of ?35000 a month, this is to be spent on ?stuff? the salary will be paid into your account at the start of the month and the allowance will be a bank card which I shall top up. The allowance is for pretty much anything you wish, clothes, shoes, tech, travel, holidays, spa days, showing off to your friends etc.

Although I would ask that you spend a least some of it on treating yourself, weather it be clothes or shoes or watches or video games, whatever your poison, as the entire purpose of this is to make us both happier people. I know money doesn't buy happiness but it's amazing how much easier the sadness is to shed when you have shiny things to distract you. The more reasons you can give a girl too like seeing you the better I think, so if there is anything that would just make this even better for you please let me know.

In regards too how long we see each other for I would suggest that when we meet to see how we get on ahead of starting, we will need to meet before agreeing to go ahead, as you really can't tell how you get on with somebody until you're in the same room, especially for the sorts of things that we would be doing. Anyway, I think the best thing is that we decide to commit to either 3 or 6 months, 3 months being the ideal minimum. Then at the end of the period we can sit down and talk and of course either extend our time together or end things. Hopefully we see each other for a long time! I don't have a specific starting date in mind, just when we're both ready :)

The few exceptions too the allowance I can think, these are the things you are not allowed to spend your allowance on:
- Vehicles and accommodation, because this essentially a contract that could last anywhere from 3 months too 3 years, or maybe even longer, it would be best that if you are looking for accommodation closer too me, or a nicer car to get too me or around the place that you let me take care off that, as then you won't be tied into any agreements or be responsible for any payments on those things. This is all completely optional!
- Bills and debts, this can come from your salary but the purpose of the allowance is to treat yourself, not to cover the basics
Getting any work done, surgery or dental work, etc. Most of these types of things require a recovery time where you would be unable too travel or would hinder other physical activities. So I would suggest that if you did want anything done, that we decide on a 6 month minimum term. I'm happy to pay for any work to be done up front so you start feeling you're absolute best, as long as we see each other a few times before hand. Then after your recovery time we can properly our agreement.
- Topping up your salary, the allowance is not for you too keep, it is to spend on ?stuff? not to pad out your bank account

I imagine you're wondering why not just give you all the money in cash, there are a few reasons for this, mostly to do with tax and that the card I will give you in order to use your allowance itself comes with certain perks such as complimentary hotel and travel upgrades. It's also I'd imagine has a much higher limit than your current card so wouldn't limit you spending it on things you love.

I am very happy to provide proof that I have the money and am happy to do this, should after you respond I feel that you are as serious as I am about all this :)

In regards to what is required from you in the short term, if you bid or message me saying you are interested in doing this with me then I shall send you the form, (which I have updated), you will be also expected to take and email specified sets of photos to myself. I can assure you that this data will be kept safe and secure and will be for my eyes only. Next is that should after filling out the form and sending the photos and talking too me then we need to meet up so that we can see how we get on and of course then we can both decide if we want to go ahead.

In regards too holiday, you can have one week off within every three month period and I would also insist that you treat yourself too a spa day and get pampered, to ensure you always feel your best at least once a month. When I say holiday, I mean holiday from this job, I would hope that we can take as many holidays together as possible.

I've had far too many girls in the past who clearly been too blinded by the few hundred pounds they would potentially loose out on, as well as not understand that this is not just a one off booking. That it is us both finding out if we are compatible enough to go ahead. Due to that us meeting before going ahead will not be paid for. I'm aware that may put some people off, however I know that the girls who actually want to do this would be willing to put in the effort and see me on there own time. I can't say I've every been paid to go to an interview and just because you're pretty doesn't mean I will you. I understand that there are time wasters on this site and a number of girls who are jealous they haven't made the cut or simply put no effort in have called me just that. However it is very far from the truth and I hope you can see from the effort I've put into this as well as the fact that I am willing to show that I have the finances to do this long term that you will join me.

I won't be seeing just anybody, and the girl I like the most I shall see first, I will see somebody else only on the basis that things don't work out between us for whatever reason. So that I know you have read this, as I intend to pay whoever I select the amount suggested please put 7777 in the either the comment box or the price box.

Looking forward to meeting you :) x

Fabulassie

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7340 on: 10 June 2015, 12:42:40 pm »
Well! That certainly was interesting!

First meeting for free, and you also have to send him nude photos.

Right.

littleminxjennifer

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7341 on: 10 June 2015, 02:22:11 pm »
haha thats the very one alice only on his RB, he was offering around ?6500 a month i think.

didn't half make me laugh

Nia Hope

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7342 on: 10 June 2015, 02:30:23 pm »
Texts yesterday.
Him, Hi, can I have your address to see if I'm near you, I'd like a booking this afternoon.
Me, Sorry but I'm fully booked a day.
Him, Can you text me the address anyway so I've got it for when I'm in the area again.
Me, No I only give out my address to guys I've spoken with and confirmed a booking time.
Him, Ok, well if you don't want to play with a 32 year old ex personal trainer then it's your loss.

 ::)
If something is not perceived it doesn't exist.

ebony

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7343 on: 10 June 2015, 09:45:22 pm »
Texts yesterday.
Him, Hi, can I have your address to see if I'm near you, I'd like a booking this afternoon.
Me, Sorry but I'm fully booked a day.
Him, Can you text me the address anyway so I've got it for when I'm in the area again.
Me, No I only give out my address to guys I've spoken with and confirmed a booking time.
Him, Ok, well if you don't want to play with a 32 year old ex personal trainer then it's your loss.

 ::)

Charming! Some guys are so full of themselves!

Nia Hope

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7344 on: 10 June 2015, 10:03:37 pm »
Texts yesterday.
Him, Hi, can I have your address to see if I'm near you, I'd like a booking this afternoon.
Me, Sorry but I'm fully booked a day.
Him, Can you text me the address anyway so I've got it for when I'm in the area again.
Me, No I only give out my address to guys I've spoken with and confirmed a booking time.
Him, Ok, well if you don't want to play with a 32 year old ex personal trainer then it's your loss.

 ::)

Charming! Some guys are so full of themselves!
I usually text back that as long as you're clean, polite and pay I don't have a preference on looks, it's like the ones that send pictures of their penis as if we are gonna be impressed!
If something is not perceived it doesn't exist.

Midsstudent

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7345 on: 10 June 2015, 10:24:24 pm »
I had someone who has escort feedback email me to offer his personal training services... is he saying I'm fat?! lol  :o

cheesypeas

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7346 on: 10 June 2015, 11:15:33 pm »
lol nahh....He wants to watch your ass go up and down for free ;D
« Last Edit: 10 June 2015, 11:55:19 pm by cheesypeas »
Random idle thoughs...Can I manage 100 sit ups a day for a year...?

BibiofLeeds

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7347 on: 11 June 2015, 11:54:20 am »
Me to caller:Hi there
Him:Have you got big tits?..Now aside from the very obvious 38GG's on my photos...what the actual feck?
Phone went down instantly.

Hadley

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7348 on: 11 June 2015, 09:32:23 pm »
I know this isn't the world's worst, but just set my teeth on edge. Made up name anybody?

Also why would I possibly want to see anyone with a "spicy chorizo" for a dick.

Hi my love

my name is Tony Cometupucha I am a very sexy hot/caliente Spanish Latin male with a very nice and spicy/naughty chorizo //// arriba !!!
Also a good salsa/ dancer that likes to perform amateur striptease for horny pretty ladies like yourself
I love role play and to have very sexy naughty time....

please let me know your availability and location and if you have a mobile number to contact you more directly
Do you meet with couples or small party swingers?

love and naughty xxxx

Tony Cometupucha
« Last Edit: 11 June 2015, 09:34:42 pm by Hadley »
"Why do people say "grow some balls"? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding."

-Betty White

victoryrose

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Re: How not to book an escort,world championships!
« Reply #7349 on: 11 June 2015, 09:46:34 pm »
Tony Cometupucha

Absolutely top quality comedy gold.  ;D