SAAFE forum
General Category => Questions and Answers => Topic started by: Escortx on 21 January 2017, 04:09:49 pm
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I have my own place and can do in calls and have researched escorting. I need the money as I was doing care work but the pay is so low and you have to do so much for it I don't really want to get back in to it.
I'm just quite a shy and nervous person and I'm worried it will affect my working. I'm not very out going and don't really socialise much. I just wanted to know does it get easier with practice? When the man knocks at my door would I say hi how are you? Could you give me the payment now. Offer him a drink or say would you like to go to my bedroom?
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I am also not very sociable or outgoing but it hasn't stopped me enjoying the job and getting good feedback.
Have you had a good read through the info on the main site about getting started?
In terms of getting the guys in, I open the door and usher them into the hallway, then I'll say "it was an hour you wanted, right? That's 120 then" and take the cash and count it right away. Then I'll say "Let's go through to the bedroom" or if I'm working a hotel I'll just say "Well, where would you like to start?" Get up close to Them, start kissing or running your hands over their chest. Then just let nature take its course ;)
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Hi Ambera, as VC says do have a read through the main site if you haven't already!
It does get easier with practice and it's natural to feel nervous the first time (and for a long time afterwards- I still get nervous after many years). But you do develop confidence and get into a routine after you've done it a few times. It does get easier as you get used to it.
When someone knocks at the door I look through the spy hole (if there is one) to make sure he is on his own and as far as possible looks nice and normal. I open the door fully dressed (in sexy gear but no nudity) with a big smile. Welcome him in, say hello, offer a drink, take his coat (all within the first 2 mins or so). If he doesn't automatically offer the money, ask "do you have something for me?" or "Would you mind if we got the business side out of the way?" within 5 mins max of him coming through the door. Always, always count the money.
After that I just put a hand on their leg or start snogging them and it tends to go from there!
Good luck :)
H x
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Ps if you have done care work that may well stand you in good stead - you are obviously a kind and compassionate person, and able to make people feel cared for. Plus you will be familiar with the human body in all it's beautiful, not so beautiful, wobbly and wrinkly forms ;D so I'm sure you'll do fine! x
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Ambera, I'm worried that going into sex work is going to make you stressed and anxious, especially if you don't enjoy the sex much. Have you thought about doing something like stripping or camming instead?
You don't need to be a particularly sociable person to be an escort, but it does make things easier if the normal social niceties and chit-chat come fairly easily to you.
I don't think you'll know for sure until you start actually seeing clients, but I'm a bit concerned that if you come over as nervous/uncertain you could be taken advantage of by some less desirable clients who will push boundaries.
Just please be careful, whatever you decide.
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Ambera, I'm worried that going into sex work is going to make you stressed and anxious, especially if you don't enjoy the sex much. Have you thought about doing something like stripping or camming instead?
You don't need to be a particularly sociable person to be an escort, but it does make things easier if the normal social niceties and chit-chat come fairly easily to you.
I don't think you'll know for sure until you start actually seeing clients, but I'm a bit concerned that if you come over as nervous/uncertain you could be taken advantage of by some less desirable clients who will push boundaries.
Just please be careful, whatever you decide.
This!!! I dont think anyone can be a weak person if escorting
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Being nervous doesn't mean you are weak! I would echo VCs post as I am naturally shy and reserved. Yet I managed to find an extra dimension I can call on during bookings.
I would also echo others that say to think deeply before taking the plunge. Read the main site www.saaafe.info and use the search tool to look for other issues you may have concerns about.
Good luck to the OP.
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Being nervous doesn't mean you are weak! I would echo VCs post as I am naturally shy and reserved. Yet I managed to find an extra dimension I can call on during bookings.
I would also echo others that say to think deeply before taking the plunge. Read the main site www.saaafe.info and use the search tool to look for other issues you may have concerns about.
Good luck to the OP.
Where did I say the op was a weak person? :FF I agreed with the previous poster and added my own thing on which is I dont think a weak person can be an escort, please point me in the direction where I said, a person who has anxiety is a weak person? ???
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This!!! I dont think anyone can be a weak person if escorting
You're right it takes alot of strength to escort with having to tolerate them.
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Where did I say the op was a weak person? :FF I agreed with the previous poster and added my own thing on which is I dont think a weak person can be an escort, please point me in the direction where I said, a person who has anxiety is a weak person? ???
I was just concerned that was how it would come over to the OP? Which after all is the primary concern. Since newbies may be very vulnerable in all aspects.
It just came over that way to me is all and two posts in a row like that I didn't want the OP to feel she couldn't continue voicing her concerns, is all. Otherwise I give up, already.
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I was just concerned that was how it would come over to the OP? Which after all is the primary concern. Since newbies may be very vulnerable in all aspects.
It just came over that way to me is all and two posts in a row like that I didn't want the OP to feel she couldn't continue voicing her concerns, is all.
No you stated id said something i didnt, but have a good night :FF
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I have my own place and can do in calls and have researched escorting. I need the money as I'm on benefits and skint so need to stop my claim. I was doing care work but the pay is so low and you have to do so much for it I don't really want to get back in to it.
I'm just quite a shy and nervous person and I'm worried it will affect my working. I'm not very out going and don't really socialise much. I just wanted to know does it get easier with practice? When the man knocks at my door would I say hi how are you? Could you give me the payment now. Offer him a drink or say would you like to go to my bedroom?
I'm a lesbian too and haven't experience with men since I dated them ten years ago but for have most experience with women.
If you don't fancy men it might be a bit more difficult compared to some one straight. Do you find men attractive?. Some can escort and some find it rough so don't. It can get easier as time passes it did for me able to see as many. I just got tired of having sex all the time. Some are great fun to be with others not so.
There is alot of advice on here about getting started also.
Good luck and make sure you make the right decision for you no one other can make. Xx.
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No you stated id said something i didnt, but have a good night :FF
Just to clarify this is exactly what you said:
This!!! I dont think anyone can be a weak person if escorting
Anyway I'm out I'm not into bickering, merely trying to help the OP.
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Where did I say the op was a weak person? :FF I agreed with the previous poster and added my own thing on which is I dont think a weak person can be an escort, please point me in the direction where I said, a person who has anxiety is a weak person? ???
as above fliss ???
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Just to clarify this is exactly what you said:
This!!! I dont think anyone can be a weak person if escorting
Anyway I'm out I'm not into bickering, merely trying to help the OP.
Sorry to butt in but the don't think clarifies, now if it was I do think which has got a different meaning. Some thing you are saying that was done. I read it like wishlist doesn't think. Does not think so doesn't. I am sure the op does not think like you fliss. :)
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I'm not sure what this is about Wishlist and MD but feels personal when I've done absolutely nothing except try and help the OP, I give up I really do.
I'm not new to this been doing this 7 years and I'm sure the Op will appreciate ALL help offered.
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don't think sexuality has anything to with it a body is a body just go for it what have you got to loose :)
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I'm not sure what this is about Wishlist and MD but feels personal when I've done absolutely nothing except try and help the OP, I give up I really do.
I'm not new to this been doing this 7 years and I'm sure the Op will appreciate ALL help offered.
Accusing wishlist of saying something she didn't say it is in black and white. So I tried to help out by breaking it down. I am not on your case Fliss just trying to help you see Wishlists point.
I am grown up now being constructive in a polite manner is well. I tried...... Okay I won't carry on with this.
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don't think sexuality has anything to with it a body is a body just go for it what have you got to loose :)
Some lesbians don't go near men even for pay was where I was coming from. A bit like some men can't go gay for pay.
If they do it might be traumatising. If they can then all is good. :)
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Accusing wishlist of saying something she didn't say it is in black and white. So I tried to help out by breaking it down. I am not on your case Fliss just trying to help you see Wishlists point.
I am grown up now being constructive in a polite manner is well. I tried...... Okay I won't carry on with this.
MD you did nothing but cause trouble. I quoted exacty what Wishlist said. I tried to help the OP. You on the other hand have not.
I'm off the forum.
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MD you did nothing but cause trouble. I quoted exacty what Wishlist said. I tried to help the OP. You on the other hand have not.
I'm off the forum.
Okay if you can't see it in black and white like some others can. It is an open forum, i was being helpful it was my intent.
Let me say it again don't think and do think has ywo different meanings. But sure if you can't see that is why Wishlist said after what you wrote. I never caused trouble it was already between you two. Shoot the one down who tries to help you see what she meant.
I'm going to go back to organising smiling feeling light. :)
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MD you did nothing but cause trouble. I quoted exacty what Wishlist said. I tried to help the OP. You on the other hand have not.
I'm off the forum.
If you don't fancy men it might be a bit more difficult compared to some one straight. Do you find men attractive?. Some can escort and some find it rough so don't. It can get easier as time passes it did for me able to see as many. I just got tired of having sex all the time. Some are great fun to be with others not so.
There is alot of advice on here about getting started also.
Good luck and make sure you make the right decision for you no one other can make. Xx.
Of course fliss I did not try to help the OP it looks like you are very stressed right now to have missed my contribution :)
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Hey babe
I was nervous when I first started all those years ago this was before I had discovered Saafe I had no one to ask about escorting I had danced and met a few girls who had escorted but they weren't very helpful the first agency I worked for I remember running off from my first client I was so nervous ha . He opened the hotel room door and I legged it out the hotel lol didn't Even say hello . Then I worked for another agency and I was very nervous didn't know what the hell I was doing I just went with the flow . I used to get very nervous my first few months of working then it went and years later my nervousness is back . It's ok to be nervous Hun . I really wouldn't advise drinking before a booking when my friend started she got so nervous she drank a whole bottle of wine before first client and passed out on him luckily he was a nice guy he just left and called the agency .
I usually open the door in a nice sexy dress and say hello give them a kiss and say hunni can I just take the money I'll go make my self look sexy and just take off my dress and walk out in my undies it really depends as some guys have the money in there hand ready to go. I used to offer guys a drink and take the money after a little chat but with so many mick takers now days get the money ASAP babe and put it away safe . Most of the time there be more nervous than you . I never told guys when I was new I was new but it's up you I would say you haven't Been doing it long .
And the 3 busiest working girls I had ever met were all lesbians the customers would all be shocked if they knew . Only offer what services you feel comfortable offering and don't let them take the mick try and relax also . When I worked for agencies the receptionists would always make sure if the girl was new they would be really really busy and try make it so that regulars saw some once you get the taste of the money your more likely going to try it again . My first year escorting was the best if I knew it would get crap now would of saved more lol .
Good luck
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Just to echo what Barbie said, don't tell clients you're new. If they say "I haven't seen you advertise before" just say you've only recently moved to the area, or that you've only recently become independent. There are some dickheads out there who deliberately target new escorts and try to push boundaries.
Also, you're not taking a vow of service here. If you see a client and you realise sex work isn't for you, you can stop. It really isn't for everyone. Yes the money is great but don't do something that you hate, because it will impact your health.
Go to your first booking with an open mind, if it's awful then you never have to do it again. If it's okay then, wahey!
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Like I said lost my nervousness after a few month and recently I have become nervous again and only going to work when I need money but once I'm working I'm ok. We are all different Hun and like the other ladies have said it can be amazing money but it's not for every one X
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Some lesbians don't go near men even for pay was where I was coming from. A bit like some men can't go gay for pay.
If they do it might be traumatising. If they can then all is good. :)
Its slightly different for men to go 'gay for pay' because they need to get a hard on, we can just use lube...
Regarding being 'traumatised', the OP has already researched having sex with men for money so I'm sure she's considered this aspect and any woman who has ever done sex work knows that they don't have to be attracted to the client to give a good service :-)
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Ambera, I'm worried that going into sex work is going to make you stressed and anxious, especially if you don't enjoy the sex much. Have you thought about doing something like stripping or camming instead?
You don't need to be a particularly sociable person to be an escort, but it does make things easier if the normal social niceties and chit-chat come fairly easily to you.
I don't think you'll know for sure until you start actually seeing clients, but I'm a bit concerned that if you come over as nervous/uncertain you could be taken advantage of by some less desirable clients who will push boundaries.
Just please be careful, whatever you decide.
I would second this advice.
To the OP, I am a fairly introverted person and to a degree also quite shy. When I first started working many years ago, I worked for a few weeks in a sauna (2 girls on a shift and we took it in turns) and through doing that initial stint I learned the ropes a little bit, but for me being so new it helped a lot especially about knowing what was expected of me. It gave me some experience of different types of customers (and that in itself was a shock!) and then after a few weeks, I started working in the West End of London in a flat with a maid and it was a smooth transition from there to moving around and doing my own thing. Then I finally went independent. Only because you have no experience am I suggesting this but I would personally advise AGAINST working completely alone or from your own home for now. You are going to have to go through a bit of a culture shock with this line of work and a steep learning curve in respect of assertiveness, safety, knowing how to screen customers, learning how to spot timewasters, how to diffuse dangerous situations, etc. You have to learn it somewhere but I don't believe working from home or alone initially is the way to go because until you fully have your wits about you (which comes from experience), it's just too easy for you to be taken advantage of or worst.
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Its slightly different for men to go 'gay for pay' because they need to get a hard on, we can just use lube...
Regarding being 'traumatised', the OP has already researched having sex with men for money so I'm sure she's considered this aspect and any woman who has ever done sex work knows that they don't have to be attracted to the client to give a good service :-)
I am learning. :)