Good morning sit him down and be very honest with him ask him if you can just do a massage only massage from your home if  it’s a private place there shouldn’t be a problem this way you don’t need to hide anything away from him plus you will still be earning your money without having to worry about having to travel and rushing back plus there is no guarantee that when you leave home for those few hours you will make money they way things are at the moment it’ will be a hit and miss more or less. My word of advice if he agrees to this make sure it’s purely massage as I know some clients can be pushy but explain to them that it’s not fare on your man they will understand. Even if it’s only from 10 am to 6pm gives you time together in the evenings. I hope this will help good luck

It's like being between a rock and a hard place,you don't have the benefits of a good relationship nor the benefits of a job and the financial freedom it gives.Sounds like you can;t have both and you're putting yourself in a very stressful situation (bad for you physical and mental health). I believe you need to take a harsh decision now and not prolong the agony. You need to put yourself first instead of this relationship.

It would be quite complicated to develop a method for working as an escort without a partner / spouse suspecting it and doing the appropriate research to confirm his doubts.

In particular a partner ...

1) who lives with you
2) who was already your client when you were an escort
3) who, perhaps, guesses that you are starting to distance yourself and who is therefore wary.


The only thing I could see would be for you to find a compelling excuse to spend a day or two a week in London (work, studies, help an elderly relative?). You would have to use an alias, a different description of yourself, maybe photos where people can't see your face and especially an advertising vehicle that he does not know.

This all seems very complicated to me: why not simply tell him that you absolutely want to start working as an escort again? Either he accepts it or he does not accept it. If he doesn't accept it, it will be the end of your relationship, but if I judge by the way you talk about him, I think your relationship is coming to an end anyway.


P.S. I agree with Ana30 too.

K212

Have you explored civvie work/training?
Might be worth looking at it as an opportunity.

Don't forget that he might have given you a short leash.
But it doesn't give you a guarantee that he is "faithful" to you.
You might say,
"oh come on, I know this guy!".
But do you really?

K212

Have you explored civvie work/training?
Might be worth looking at it as an opportunity.

Don't forget that he might have given you a short leash.
But it doesn't give you a guarantee that he is "faithful" to you.
You might say,
"oh come on, I know this guy!".
But do you really?

Oh don’t worry I don’t doubt he could. He was a client after all. But I know where his money goes predominantly. He pays the bills and wouldn’t have it any other way. If he wasn’t or I was forking out money on a relationship I wasn’t 100% on right now and I found him spending on seeking services he wouldn’t have his manhood intact trust me. It’s just where I’m not 100% happy with his behaviour as a person right now i feel why should I sacrifice making savings for a rainy day at this time. I am in my thirties and making substantial savings was previously v important to me for if in a few years I’m single and need to set self up in life or god forbid need fertility treatment for leaving having children later in life or whatever crops up in life. And escorting is money that makes hard savings more than most professions.
We have a joint small business we started but it’s modest in earnings and means we’re in each other’s pockets 24/7. Which I’m sure he prefers. But yes like previous poster mentioned. Shortly going to retrain in something mainstream that should be lucrative enough and give me time to be me separate from him and do some more thinking on what feels right. I guess I just miss the big jobs, and generous clients that bring no drama and that great feeling after. Specially at the times when your dealing with a partner you feel isn’t pulling their weight in being a better person half the time. His weight has gone out the window, personal hygiene, he wants to spend 24/7 together, fed up of cleaning up around him, but then there’s ways we connect on other levels like humour and open mindedness, accepting each other’s past. His kids and the people in our joint business that rely on me being part of the show running it. It’s hard enough to find a companion these days and I can admit I was lonely at times in my single escorting days, I guess no scenario is ever a perfect one. I guess I will give it some time to see how I feel. But I really do envy the ladies out here who’s partners can accept them working and have a functioning relationship alongside it.

if I do leave him like a previous poster mentioned. I couldn’t / wouldn’t say I chose escorting back over him as that would be degraded to me as “you have gone back to that what a big shame” etc. Even though most of my best clients in my day paid double what he did than when we met. He thinks like many ignorant ones do, that it’s a desperate choice in life to make. Like going back to escorting is failing in his eyes. Some just never understand and have a warped view.
 So I would just move on and say of course I didn’t go back to how I met you.. Wouldn’t want to give that satisfaction even when they have no idea the step up in life some of the best clients give us, the liberation, financial advancement etc. Only we know being in the same boat how it is much better than other situations.

But Ana30 your post really hit home and will have a long hard think about things. Thanks for your input all.

Life eh, never simple is it 

Exactly.

Don’t worry I remind him I was paid, while he had to pay for it. From women who were far likely too busy thinking of they’re shopping list whilst ever at it with him for the hour no doubt, whenever or ever that conversation comes up.
And the sorts of services he was paying for too. No one shames me.. i can Shame them right back ten folds.

I think it’s more the fact he see’s it as a step back not an advancement in life. But it doesn’t feel that way when I’m watching his snoring lazy Ass on the sofa when a clients emailing saying it’s a shame I can’t join him on his boat  . So if the time comes and I decide it’s no longer worth investing in and I bail out I just won’t give any insight that I’d be returning to work.

I had forgotten how dull civvie relationships can be at the worsts of times. But then I also remember the torturous tours now and then when working abroad alone bored in a hotel room, the lack of companionship or the odd dickhead client. I guess it’s just about weighing up the pro’s and cons. I do miss the glitz and glam of the better jobs though and the being able to jump on a flight or have a quick exciting rendezvous with the perfect gent client type.

I think this is a very personal question you  need to ask yourself: "what's more convenient for me, to invest in this relationship or to invest in my financial future?" You need to weigh the pro's and the con's.

Only you can answer that 

Yep, also how long you would want to escort for if you went back to it, and if you want a family - if so, and you don't think this bloke is fatherhood material, why prolong the inevitable?