Well work and your personal life are two different things, so maybe try to think of ways to avoid confusing the two? I doubt that what many people here enjoy in their personal life has a lot to do with shagging randoms for money and you're there to please your customers, not yourself; given that it's making you uncomfortable and possibly putting you at risk then just keep 'your' stuff for trusted partners .

I don't know how long you have been escorting, but I think it's fairly normal when you start, especially if you genuinely enjoy sex. 

However, (in my experience) I found that a couple of not so nice ones and boundary pushers made me realise that you have to keep alert and on the ball and not get lost in sexual excitement. As others have said, you do have to keep your 'real life' and escorting life separate. You need to remain in total control with your wits about you. I would hate for someone to go over the line with you. You obviously recognise the dangers of offering subby services, so stick with your boundaries, even if you feel hot for it at the time, don't let them or ask them!

You will get better at detaching self and acting - I'm sure you have had a few clients who do nothing for you - the idea is to act, not work out how to make them better lovers!

OP are you involved in any local fetish/BDSM scenes?

Not a chance I'd allow a client to dominate me in session. Too many boundary pushers out there.
Definitely find yourself someone to indulge in your fantasies that is an actual friend/someone you can trust.

Join the website fetlife it’s for people who like that type of thing

Or a swinging site & you can check the guys feedback.

I'm with xw5 though if it's a client who you have good rapport & you initiate it, why not enjoy yourself on the job. As long as you trust your instincts & do it with guys who are respectful.

The boundary pushers are easy to spot. It's knowing the red flags. You can get boundary pushers on a massage with HR booking. They come in all guises.