..

I was only going to contact her privately but then I remembered that the OP will not be the only one feeling like this so, I'll say this here for anyone else reading (and you can still chat to me in email confidentially Change1 x)

I think that there are a lot of WG's who are also in your situation but it's rarely talked about on the forums for two reasons-firstly a lot of the sexworkers here and in other places are still 'active' in their jobs and, lets face it, talking about this side of things is very bad for business and secondly, people just are uncomfortable with being honest or frightened of being patronised as being the 'victim'. It's fucking bullshit of course, as this job really fucks an awful lot of people up.

I was also 18/19 when I started, I had very little life experience and very little sexual experience;I'd actually only had sex once before and had never even given anyone a blowjob or handjob  .

I started working in my gap year before university with a view towards funding myself through. Nobody pushed me into it-but my financial situation was dire and I was desperate to make a life for myself. At the time I thought I was really cool with my 'alternative lifestyle'.

Nothing really terrible happened to me while I was working-above and beyond the normal wankers and horrors that all WG's come across. But....it took it's toll on my physically and mentally. I'm 99% OK now but, it's been many years now since I saw my last client and there are still things that resurface from time to time. I had no history of sexual abuse or depression before working, no boyfriend beating me up and no drug issue. (I'm only mentioning this as it's often used to 'explain away' girls who feel this way.

I know that you are not alone because I have heard difficult stories time and time again in IM/email from WG's on the forums. The same WG's who post about everything being sunshine and roses publically. You're not alone.

I have nothing to lose and nothing to prove here and I am happy to talk to you or anyone else who's in the same way. I'm not saying i've got all the answers or some great wisdom, but I am ok now, after not feeling 100% for a long time, at the very least you could yak on to someone who will admit that it's a fucking bitch having to fuck strangers for a living x

shadylady (from punternet/wales/the moon)
sallyo70@hotmail.com

Cheers Shady,
This is why I've said that girls under the age of 21 shouldn't be in this business. You really do have to be fully mentally equiped to deal with people in this business, and I don't mean just the guys.
I know that some ladies have argued that they think they're more mature than the average 18yr old and can cope. But sometimes you don't feel the effects of this job until after you leave.
At 18yrs old you haven't lived and you haven't loved, not really. And if at 18 you think this is all there is, and this is how men are, then it's easy to screw with your mind.

The despression and anxiety and the PTS were a result of being an escort.

Not much to add to all of the above really.  Keep going with the treatment, it will get better but it takes time and determination which you seem to have.  As for the above, its really easy with depression to pin point a 'cause' of the depression but sometimes it goes a lot deeper than you think.  maybe just have a look beyond the escorting and see if there is the slightest chance that it might have happened sooner or later anyway.  Depression is usually brought on by an event of some sort but sometimes it is just exposed by the event and would have come out sooner or later anyway.  and have a look at this site http://www.bbc.co.uk/headroom/rubys/ , some of the stories are really encouraging.  good luck and take care. x

I would just like to point out that depression can be an illness that you have that isnt caused by a particular event or circumstance. Sometimes its just an caused by a chemical inbalance that you have a predisposition to and will only be made easier if and when that inbalance is sorted either by medication, exercise or herbal. So I would recommend you researching altnernative methods also as a simple thing like diet can affect you.

I am putting this one out here as mental health is something close to my heart. I do suffer with depression and was dianogised 3 years ago. Since then I have therapy, cbt and medication. I now use herbal remedies, exercise and keep a dairy but the main reason I am able to live with this illness is by accepting that it is part of me and recognising warning symptoms of a down spell eg sleeping too much.

It seems weird but the reason I have become an escort is because it does help me overcome these issues because it makes me feel powerful, sexy, femine and love being my own boss but thats my mindset it doesnt work like that for everyone and everyone will at some point feel depressed within thier lives.

I think what I am trying to say is there is a difference between someone who suffers with depression and someone who is depressed and so the treatment needs sometimes to differ with each type and so I would try and find out which one you think it might be and research the best way of treating your symptoms.

Just an idea tho maybe we could create something ourselves to help WG who have mental health issues or need to talk about any issues encountered by this job? We see there is a gap in the care for us so why don't we do something about it ourselves?

I would just like to point out that depression can be an illness that you have that isnt caused by a particular event or circumstance. Sometimes its just an caused by a chemical inbalance that you have a predisposition to and will only be made easier if and when that inbalance is sorted either by medication, exercise or herbal. So I would recommend you researching altnernative methods also as a simple thing like diet can affect you.

sure sure, but she said escorting caused it. As much as I appreciate what you are saying, you are also in a way negating her own experience

Sorry if it has looked that way but that was not the intention. Yes the escorting was the trigger of it which means she has post trumatic stress but there could be a chance that the escorting brought on a underlying mental health issue that she already had but was not aware of.

I would love to write a small artical for the site. As I am still really new to escorting (just over a month) I would have limited knowledge but can be assistance regarding mental health and seeking help. 

I agree Stephanie. I was surprised when I went to counselling as to what came out as the real underlying problem - I cried many tears in the sessions that followed. Of course it could very well be the escorting for this lady but it could be something subconcious. My counselling went on for 8 months, first weekly, then fortnightly and then monthly. It is not a short process if done properly and it is crucial to see the process through to the end IMO.

I would love to write a small artical for the site. As I am still really new to escorting (just over a month) I would have limited knowledge but can be assistance regarding mental health and seeking help. 

Stephanie, whatever you can do would be most appreciated. The emphasis is a little less on escorting and more on mental health, which you obviously have knowledge of. Whatever yourself or/and Shady could provide would be of great value.