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Author Topic: Restriction question  (Read 4164 times)

Dionne

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Restriction question
« on: 25 April 2011, 08:41:41 pm »
at the moment i accept calls/bookings from all races/nationalities
 but as of late im considering only taking bookings from guys whos first language is english
mainly because im sick and tired of struggling to have conversations with guys who speak english as a second language. and i find im repeating myself or the guys have no grasp of manners or what is or isnt acceptable social behaviour!!!

ive seen a few girls who only see guys  of specific races/ages but what i want to know is am i being unreasonable/bigoted (for lack of a better word) for wanting to only see guys who speak english as a first language or is it a case of 'doing what ever i want to do??'

i don't want to come across to other guys as being a bigot

(sorry if this post makes no sense or lacks grammer/spelling - ive been doing assignments all day and my brain has switched itself off)

xw5

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #1 on: 25 April 2011, 09:21:42 pm »
Well, it might be a bit difficult to detect people whose first language is something else, but who are fluent in English! But presumably you'd be happy with them.

Because yes, bookings with people you can't communicate effectively with can be a nightmare. This is one reason for screening: you can be brutal in your screening, declining anyone you can't understand on the phone, for example.


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Simone

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #2 on: 25 April 2011, 09:44:16 pm »
Hi Dionne

When it comes to this job I believe that the most important thing is that you are happy and comfortable with what you are doing. If that means being "unreasonable" then I personally think you are free to be as unreasonable as you like.

A booking with a client who speaks very poor English can be utterly excruciating (and I speak from experience here). I don't accept bookings from guys who don't have a decent grasp of the English language either. This job can be tricky enough as it is without throwing massive communication difficulties into the mix.

So basically as XW5 says feel free to be brutal if it makes you feel more at ease. Your happiness is the most important thing at the end of the day :)

Dionne

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #3 on: 25 April 2011, 09:51:40 pm »
thank you!!
i just wanted an opinion from someone else

i had a call from a guy just last week and trying to ask him for the booking ref number for his hotel was like trying to explain pavlovs dog to a todler. i had to stop answering his calls after a while because we were going round and round in circles!!!
xx

Lorelei

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #4 on: 25 April 2011, 09:56:01 pm »
ive seen a few girls who only see guys  of specific races/ages but what i want to know is am i being unreasonable/bigoted (for lack of a better word) for wanting to only see guys who speak english as a first language or is it a case of 'doing what ever i want to do??'

i don't want to come across to other guys as being a bigot
Bigot non-bigot, who cares? You don't need anyone's permission for choosing who you want to have sex with and who you don't.

I personally have declined phone callers, including British-sounding ones, whose speech I couldn't understand for whatever reason. I just said to them that I could not continue discussing with them as I did not understand well enough their speech; if they asked why I woudn't see them I just replied "because I so choose" and hang up.

pussycat

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #5 on: 25 April 2011, 10:22:13 pm »
I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. I have recently had to stop seeing guys who don't speak very good English after one was hanging around at my buzzer not pressing the right number/loitering, when I tried to contact him he was unable to understand the basic 'walk away and I'll come down and find you', needed to get him away because I could see residents in my block coming towards the entrance, and they are a bit nosey (but lovely and friendly) and would've probably asked which flat he was looking for etc, and it'd be obvious if they spoke to him that he wasn't a friend or relative of mine, plus he wouldn't know my real name to tell them who he was looking for. Had a few incidents like this so just best not to see them anymore. I know girls who have had negative experiences with guys from certain races and it's entirely our prerogative in this job who we choose and choose not to see for whatever reasons :). X

April Showers

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #6 on: 25 April 2011, 10:37:05 pm »
I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. I have recently had to stop seeing guys who don't speak very good English after one was hanging around at my buzzer not pressing the right number/loitering, when I tried to contact him he was unable to understand the basic 'walk away and I'll come down and find you', needed to get him away because I could see residents in my block coming towards the entrance, and they are a bit nosey (but lovely and friendly) and would've probably asked which flat he was looking for etc, and it'd be obvious if they spoke to him that he wasn't a friend or relative of mine, plus he wouldn't know my real name to tell them who he was looking for. Had a few incidents like this so just best not to see them anymore. I know girls who have had negative experiences with guys from certain races and it's entirely our prerogative in this job who we choose and choose not to see for whatever reasons :). X

Just was going to post a similar thing if any one can't speak English enough i wont take the booking either as it is to much hard work directing them to my address discreetly with out them messing up going to wrong address and recieving five million phone calls off them and it taking about a hour for them to go down one street and  then it is a hour passed their appointment time ..then i don't want to do them as i am irate.......BUT what pisses me off more is when the English ones do it lol .........bangs head on floor ........they can be outside your window looking at the houses across the road you tel them to turn round so they do.........a full 360 % so they are facing the same direction ;-p

Steele

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #7 on: 26 April 2011, 01:10:36 am »
I personally think it's bigoted to refuse to see men of a certain race, but a good command of the English language is important. I need to be able to communicate easily and quickly with my clients - if they start doing something that's unacceptable they need to understand me telling them to stop, etc. And it is a total pain in the ass trying to give instructions about confirmation, getting to your incall location, etc when someone doesn't understand you or you can't understand their questions. I can't see that anyone could be offended by you not seeing people who aren't fluent in English (although as xw5 said, you probably won't know if it's their second language as long as they speak it well).
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Lady_Lust_XXX

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #8 on: 26 April 2011, 09:51:58 am »
I totally agree that if the callers cannot understand you on the phone (mind you im scottish and no one understands me - except the scots) then it is completely mind numbing - but if you cant have a conversation with a client  :-[

However, where I live, there are only two 'non white caucasian' families and if someone of any non white race was to visit me then all eyes would be on me - and that is definitely not something that I want. 

So if I get calls from non white caucasian (going by their accents - and yes I have to ask sometimes) I have to decline which can be annoying for they could be very nice people but I'm just not going to risk the security and anonymity of my working apartment so that these guys can visit.  It's just something I have to live with and accept.

Our security and anonymity is paramount in this line of business.

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It is about having a pretty mind, a pretty heart,
And most importantly a beautiful soul.

Steele

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #9 on: 26 April 2011, 03:00:39 pm »
I've heard a few ladies say that, and while I can completely respect that people need to protect their anonymity in this line of work I think maybe this is a bit paranoid? Most non-prostitute/client types don't think about sex work all the time, and most people wouldn't want to challenge someone on the basis that "ooooo you have NON WHITE people visiting you" because it would make them sound like a racist asshole. Unless you're planning a constant stream of them every day (which would draw attention no matter what) I can't see why anyone would assume that it was anything other than normal friends/work collegues/people doing work on the house etc. If you do have racist neighbours then they might not like it but I still can't see them making the jump that non-white visitors = WHORE. Plus you could have a white guy turn up dressed or acting in a way that is out of character for the neighbourhood (I'm thinking chav in the kind of street my parents lived in when I was a kid haha - someone would have probably called the police before he got to the front door!).

There are no black/asian people living on my estate that I'm aware of, and I've never seen any in the immediate surrounding area. It's a very white part of town, but I've never had a neighbour challenge me on this basis. I've been found out (I think) but that's because I'm a quickie escort and sometimes see quite a lot of people in a day, and also I dress like a street walker for nights out (cos I'm classy that way :P) so they've seen me coming and going looking trashy. So uh, the moral of the story is avoid doing that lol, but I don't really see that the race of my clients makes a difference either way.

Sorry that's rambly. You're not a bigot if you're wanting to have a certain type of client to protect your anonymity and stuff, not at all. I think it's bigoted when you see escorts refusing non-whites or one particular race when it's obviously a racism issue (like if they're offering outcalls) as there is no other business where that kind of thing would be allowed and there is no logical reason why a white client will be better than any other (believe me I've met some pasty white dickheads who deserve a slap!).
Previously known as Krystal Champagne

naughtyjas

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #10 on: 27 April 2011, 10:06:32 pm »
I only see people I can understand, so they either need to speak English or Punjabi.   Communication is too important in this business to be left to chance.

When I fiirst started working I could not believe that girls would say that they would not see certain nationalities, I thought 'OMG how narrow minded'.  But now I get it.  It's such a personal service that if you don't want to see someone for whatever reason, it should be up to you.  It's okay to define your boundaries based on your particular comfort levels.  The last thing you want is to feel like you are being made to see someone just to be seen as being 'politicaly correct.'  Because nothing else will effect your mental health quicker in this game than seeing clients that you really do not want to. 

Jas x

Sweet-Pleasure

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #11 on: 07 May 2011, 07:12:38 am »
It's a tricky line to walk to be honest, I don't have any restrictions on language/race etc but sometimes I think about it.

I had a gent with a heavy accent visit recently who thought he could have a 3some for the same prices as a one on one just because my buddy was there, it took half his booking to explain that she would need to be paid too lol!

He also decided he wanted anal while I was in a compromising position, I told him it cost extra so he said nevermind and then tried anyway! I don't know if it was a genuine language barrier of if he was just using it as an excuse to be an ass hat.

River

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #12 on: 10 May 2011, 07:54:57 pm »
Well there is a safety issue involved.
English as a first or second or third or fifth language is totally fine for me,
as long as they are able to understand what I'm offering,
and able to communicate this fact back to me.

Do they clearly understand what is on offer and what is not?
Try explaining it.
"Do you understand?"
"Yes"
"Where are you travelling from?"
"Yes"
"Would you prefer me in a dress or skin tight jeans"
"Yes"
"I don't do bareback"
"Yes"
"What is your name?
"Yes""

And for me the bigee is that I've no idea if they realise that I
1) Have a penis
& if they do know,
2) That there is no way on earth that I will fuck them with it

In my early days escorting, during disrobing,  I had a couple of clients freeze, look worried & point, saying
"What is that?"  :o :o :o
before making a speedy exit {after I've refunded them}

It really isn't worth the hassle if  they don't speak enough language.
I am unable to safely contract with them.

LeticiaMorgan

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #13 on: 11 May 2011, 03:14:44 am »
Oh Jodie, one of my lovely lady friends here in Australia has experienced much the same problem on the odd occasion, whereby a client didn't have English as a first language and didn't understand what a TG was.
--
Here in Australia, it's very common for escorts to turn down Indian/Pakistani and African American men, as the majority of rapes and sexual assaults on escorts are by these races. Racist - yes, but protecting your safety - more paramount then being accused of racism.

L xx

sammy s

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Re: Restriction question
« Reply #14 on: 11 May 2011, 11:53:40 am »
It's definitely a tricky one but I totally agree that someone who doesnt speak decent English is a no no because they might not have been able to understand your profile properly and see that you have stated "NO ANAL" and then proceed to try and ram it up you. Communication is key in this job to make sure both parties are comfortable and happy, and you most importantly feel safe.

As for men of different nationalities, I really struggle with this one. I am not a racist person at all and actually dated an asian guy for a long time when I was 16. One of my best friends is black  and my sister in law is japanese.
However, after working in East London for a while (which is saturated with ethnic minorities) I was put off seeing asian men. Every single one of them (and I mean every single one) was either rough, rude or chancers.
They would all ask for discounts or bareback during the booking. And they would all pin me down and practically smother me. I would say 50% of them would then start hassling me for a date outside of work or just send annoying texts asking what im up to etc.

When I moved I had a few asian clients and they were all lovely and polite. And just to balance things out I have had some hideous white clients too in my time.

I dont feel like I can state on my profile that I dont see asian men as this just makes me look like a racist fool. My heart does sink when I see anyone who isnt white at my door though, especially if their profile name has been John Brown and they introduce themselves face to face as Mohammed Ali.