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Author Topic: Relationships whilst escorting?  (Read 110107 times)

MissElvira

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #495 on: 18 July 2021, 04:42:09 pm »
Hi Jessie and often in any relationship it's important to pay attention to how the person acts and treat you in the beginning and this is the Honeymoon stage and your guy already doesn't like that you escort, Interrogated you over a booking running over. Unless you set your boundaries and your boyfriend accepts them then things could get worse or end up stressful and mess with your head. Ask yourself why you need to escort and if it's for financial gain and your lifestyle and future, Can this relationship supply you with more and will you be happy and financially independent. Also think how he may try and sabotage you working, Loads of sex in the beginning is great but if your too sore to work then that's uncomfortable for you may have to pass up on bookings making a loss. Ideally a partner in crime would understand and you could hold back on too much sex with your well endowed partner and save it for a time you can have a days break from escorting.

Other ladies may have more experience with relationships and escorting, I have avoided it and wouldn't date a guy who knew I was escorting, From the guys I have dated they would not want me having sex with anyone else.

It's a tough one, I'd like a relationship and to keep escorting but not the complications or someone just happy to have me give them a nice lifestyle.

saltysweet

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #496 on: 18 July 2021, 09:52:58 pm »
I've just starting seeing someone new who I've know a while and always known my job but never been happy about it. This is my only source of income and I make more than I would in civvy life.

First thing my new fella has quite a big cock and although I really enjoy sex with him I get rather sore after even the next day. We both have quite a high sex drive and were in our so called honeymoon period so endless shagging at the moment.

So last week we had sex a few times which left me sore the next day when I had a booking. Sex with my client was taking longer than normal but had to stop due to the soreness. Luckily he was ok finishing with a hj. I'm wondering if this might cause a problem with my work now so trying to figure a way to get the balance right with my fella.

Because he doesn't like me doing this job, my last booking ran over by ten mins and he kept texting me giving me hassle as he knew what time the booking was and that I was seeing a regular who I'm fond of and know he has feelings for me. I reassured him he's just a client and that's it.

I've always been very open with my new fella about my job and my clients but now thinking maybe I shouldn't tell him so much. I can't deal with the stress of him interfering with my work.

Just wondered if anyone has had similar experiences and how to deal with this.

From experience I see it going one way...sounds like 'the bad thing' is starting.
Fuck buddies or boyfriends can get all territorial to controlling and poke nose in your business. But that only happens if one enables it.

You're aware he's always disliked your job, so I wonder how you see this situation improving from this bad start?

Letting him into the emotional status of your client could be an error on your part. Do you think he really needs to know? Jealously seems like a fairly 'normal' reaction. So I have some sympathy for this person. There's a few predictable ways this situation usually plays out.
« Last Edit: 19 July 2021, 03:17:09 am by saltysweet »

Kay

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #497 on: 19 July 2021, 01:31:58 am »
I was also going to comment that - as well as you being into him - he may be demanding a lot of sex in a territorial way. Only you will know the answer to that, but combined with his previous negative attitude it is a bit of a red flag.

My take would be enjoy it while it lasts, but perhaps don't get seriously attached any time soon...
"There is no sin except stupidity" - Oscar Wilde

Gypsy

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #498 on: 19 July 2021, 08:21:14 am »
I'm trying to have a casual fling with my ex postie at the moment. His marriage ended last year and we ended up kissing last week. I've decided I can't have a relationship whilst in this job and he's said he doesn't want another relationship either, so I'm going to suggest friends with benefits thing and see what happens.

He doesn't know about my job and I'm very low volume.
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

Gypsy

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #499 on: 22 July 2021, 06:35:17 pm »
At what point did you do the big reveal of being a sex worker? First time meeting? Second date? A few months in?
Just looking for some advice and experiences with it, I’ve never dealt with it but I want to branch out to dating someone and fully aware it’ll be hit and miss as they won’t know what I do at first.

Unless you're out to family and friends, I would never risk it. Huge risk to take if things go south.

That's why for the time being, I can't let myself get that close to someone and the only way for things to change is if I move away from my area or people die!
« Last Edit: 04 September 2021, 04:44:38 pm by Gypsy »
These days there are no Prince Charmings. A girl just has to be her own hero

Sweetexotica

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #500 on: 04 September 2021, 11:20:57 am »
Heya ladies,
I was hoping to see if I can get any advice on a situation with a guy I've started to see. He's definitely not you're average guy, he lives on a Greek island. So therefore I feel like that's made him a bit close minded or inexperienced in this sought of area. Hes not happy that I'm doing this as a job and he definitely has insecurities about it and thinks that if and when I have fun it's not a good thing. I mean sex is just sex.. just fun.. mindless. I always confirm that's he's just different off course and special with an emotional deeper connection whereabouts my clients are not. I want to keep trying to see this guy but if he's going to keep being insecure about this I can't handle it. It's only a recent thing I understand that it's something new he needs to try to understand but if he can't accept it still in a few months I won't be able to handle it
 Anyways have you ladies had any experience with guys you've been seeing and how did you go about it. I already said to him I'll be doing this for at least another 6 months and will be going into other avenues after so he needs to accept it. I feel like guys in the UK would be more accepting of this situation xx

TantricTease

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #501 on: 04 September 2021, 01:10:50 pm »
You will get guys that are okay with it but they are few and far between, and when you argue “you’re a prostitute” may get thrown at you, my last boyfriend did this like it was a put down, I said back to him “you’re just a fucking postman”🤣🤣

Miffy

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #502 on: 04 September 2021, 01:19:43 pm »
I do not think his nationality or where he lives has anything to do with it. A man is either going to be supportive of his girlfriend being a sex worker or he is not. Sadly, no matter how much you like this man, he is never going to be ok with the fact you're a service provider or understand where you're coming from and that the sex is just sex, and that it is meaningless. For some, sex will never be meaningless.

Personally, I think it is best to cut your losses now.


ana30

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #503 on: 04 September 2021, 02:19:37 pm »
Heya ladies, I was hoping to see if I can get any advice on a situation with a guy I've started to see. He's definitely not you're average guy, he lives on a Greek island. So therefore I feel like that's made him a bit close minded or inexperienced in this sought of area.

Mediterranean culture is a pretty patriarchal and traditional and men are a tad.. a tad chauvinistic. Culturally greek men are closer to Turkish culture than lets say... south of France. This man may like you a lot but he's fighting against his culture and upbringing, so good luck with that. I mean... it's difficult for a western European man to accept a sex worker GF let alone a Greek man. I would give it a go and see how this pans out, and like you say: put a time limit to it, meaning, if in a few months he hasn't come to terms with it... find greener pastures. I know first hand of an ex sex worker who left the industry to marry a very straight traditional type and 4 years into the relationship (they're still together) her ex job is still an "issue" he keeps throwing against her like some deadly weapon.
« Last Edit: 04 September 2021, 03:52:01 pm by ana30 »
Mornings were made for sleeping, wild sex and bacon.

Jessiegirl

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #504 on: 04 September 2021, 03:30:40 pm »
I think it is difficult for a lot of guys to accept especially in my case I get a lot of sexual satisfaction from many clients.

I had a brief relationship recently but broke it off as he stressed me out too much which affected my work. It can make them insecure and at times jealous.

I think the fact you are moving out of this business could help but if things ever go wrong they could take swipe at you referring to your previous work which can be hurtful.

The guy I was seeing said some hurtful things to me once I broke it off with him.

Vintage Miss

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #505 on: 24 September 2021, 10:47:47 am »
You will get guys that are okay with it but they are few and far between, and when you argue “you’re a prostitute” may get thrown at you, my last boyfriend did this like it was a put down, I said back to him “you’re just a fucking postman”🤣🤣

Yea and this will happen even if you quit. One ex was found of tell me to 'get back to the brothel, whore' during arguments. He ended up getting done for sex crimes years later. Just a rank, hypocritical misogynist basically, and misogynists will use anything to throw at women - whore, fat, old, loud, ugly whatever. Fuck 'em.

northernstar

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #506 on: 24 September 2021, 06:30:25 pm »
Silly question but will still ask:

Is prostitution the same as promiscuity if it’s just for the money and in your “normal” life you’re either completely cockless or within a relationship?

sw London girl

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #507 on: 25 September 2021, 10:36:52 pm »
I started escorting about  ten years ago, while being in a relationship back then and told my bf. Back then I thought that I would never be with a man if he is ok with this job... I only told him, because he was involved in this business himself and I was already emotionally involved in our relationship. Yes He was ok but but eventually we ended up calling police after a domestic accident all because of this job. So after him I promised to myself to stay single if I am working.

Two years later, maybe because I was lonely... I fell for a client who was lonely too and we just had some instant connection. Me who was so strict and saying things like I would never ever date a client... But then it happened to me... When thinking now I wasnt even attracted to him as a man, but he was more like friend. It was the biggest mistake ever that I stopped working because of him, he was very clear if I date him I have to stop... and because I had some other good income back then I agreed. But he never really trusted me and I know it was because of what I did for a living. I left him after 3 years.... Best decision ever!

Again, I promised never to fall for a client no matter how he makes me feel... how great sex is etc.... BUT one of the things I learned in my life is never sa never... I am in love with a client.... He first came to visit me earlier this year and he knew from our first meeting that I fancied him, then we met few more times. He started asking me out but I was strong and declined. But one day after his another attempt I agreed to go out just to have some fun. And we agreed that if he wanted sex he would pay. Things didnt as planned, after just one night together and since now I cant stop thinking about him... its even harder because he is so nice to me, just the man I always dreamed about.... he is fine with what I do but I guess its because he is married/ separated. So we are now in sort of friends with benefits type of relationship but exclusive ( he insisted) of course that in personal life, as work is work. I am in love, and wonder if he is telling me the true about his marriage being dead and his plans to get divorce.... he was the one starting talking about us as a couple, future plans, feelings and I am really stuck...

Its definitely great to have someone who accept what you do....and treats you nice,gives you all the love, attention, cuddles, intimacy even if he is not really yours...


Vintage Miss

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #508 on: 27 September 2021, 05:20:01 pm »

Its definitely great to have someone who accept what you do....and treats you nice,gives you all the love, attention, cuddles, intimacy even if he is not really yours...

There is a pretty good chance that if he is lying to his wife, that he is lying to you. I would do the whole 'its all going to end in tears' speech, but you're an adult and I'm sure you already know the risks. I just think sometimes we sex workers find ourselves accepting less than what is reasonable and fair because we are 'grateful' for any guy that deigns to 'accepts' our work. And I wouldn't mind betting some guys work that out, and even if they don't like the whole sex work thing, instead of running, spot an opportunity to get the 'relationship' to work their way.

Don't get me wrong, I think its understandable that some people wouldn't feel happy about dating someone who has sex with other people, money or not, but they should just be honest about that and walk away rather than using it as leverage, which I think happens.

ana30

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Re: Relationships whilst escorting?
« Reply #509 on: 27 September 2021, 09:12:45 pm »
Its definitely great to have someone who accept what you do....and treats you nice,gives you all the love, attention, cuddles, intimacy even if he is not really yours...

I hope you're charging him properly for all those cuddles otherwise if you're doing it "pro-bono" it's going to be a very tough cookie to digest once you find out he's never going to divorce his wife. Not that you won't get hurted or feel less used (you will, being mislead in the love department is painful for anyone) but it's less painful and you will feel less used  with a million pounds extra in your bank account.
Mornings were made for sleeping, wild sex and bacon.