I would like a relationship where I'm respected. But respect these days is something of a mirage - even for people with civvy jobs!

I don't know. I'm torn. I would like a relationship, but the thought of going on countless dates trying to find someone decent overwhelms me. I don't meet men outside this job and I'd rather know someone first before I consider dating them, so internet dating is out of the question.

I've also had bad relationship experience before, especially with my long term ex whom I lived with. He was the only man I've lived with and he was a nightmare in terms of verbal abuse etc. I didn't do this job back then. Suffice to say I'm so much happier without him, but the thought of remaining single forever because of all this makes me think he has won and I hate that thought! Mind you, I've had another relationship since then, but that didn't work out either.

Reading all this back I'm a textbook case for a psychologist 

but you must catch them when they are emotionally fragile and feel left alone

Emmmmm.... No. Having been on the other end of manipulation in a relationship, I would never do it to someone else just so that I can continue the work I want. I am going to do this job. If I find a partner who's happy with that then cool. But I won't manipulate someone or prey on vulnerable men to accept it.

If those are the dynamics you have in your marriage and it works for you guys; awesome. But please don't advise people to manipulate men in order to find a partner who will "accept" this job.

Not cool.

I really rally like sex work .. I stripped, escorted, played sugarbaby. I just love doing it. I love the connection, the sex, the flirting, the action, feeling desired..

Luckily my husband supports me and lets me do it. I have two nights a week and four weeks a year when i can stay out and be with other men. We also have other rules, like i cannot ever mention the money i make with him. I can save it, spend it, waste it, as long as i pay taxes and keep it hidden he is ok with it. He wants to pay all bills, doesn't want me to put food on table with it ... I can only buy lingerie with it, miniskirts, anything sexy to turn heads.

There are men who are very happy to accept sex work, find it hot, but you must catch them when they are emotionally fragile and feel left alone because you are with someone else .. Then one has to be super sweet with them to compensate.. Your husband is your best regular, you must treat him really well

Bloody hell, what a steaming pile of horseshit.

Then one has to be super sweet with them to compensate.. Your husband is your best regular, you must treat him really well

I could be out of line and misread alot of this. Does your husband also treat you as his "best escort or sugar baby"? I know you both swing, me and my ex husband also did as well as being in a somewhat open relasionship but I think he would have cried or left me if I said he was like my best regular. Be careful what you post here as your husband could read it as could family or children etc.

I strongly believe a relasionship can work while escorting if you find the right person but neither side should be fake or manipulate the other just find what works for them as a couple.

I am friendly with a man I know outside of escorting.  He knows about the job and although we get on well we just socialise and the odd kiss and hug.  We don't have sex.  Whereas I would like more I know he doesn't so I believe it is the job that puts him off.

Also he is used to not wearing condoms so he knows I wouldn't compromise on the matter!

I think we are doomed.  Unless he slowly weakens.

I do see him every week near enough.  Unless he is busy with family holidays.  His son and his parents.

A bit like a boyfriend without the sex perhaps!

He isn't very sexual as he is strong in spiritual matters but in 6 months of getting to know him we never did the deed.

Perhaps he just doesn't feel the same way oh well!

I've never had a problem getting into relationships whilst escorting. Been with my current boyfriend almost 2 years and its very happy I only found that they don't want their friends and family knowing (understandable!) Overall, I think a lot of men actually like it because we can be more open-minded sexually and they find it fun/exciting. Obviously, a super conservative man wouldn't like it but thats not the kinda man I'd want to be with anyway.

Loved reading all that and could relate to all of it..especially the part about not turning a holiday into a tour....guilty!!!

Serious question how do some of you girls cope with trusting a man? Considering most of the guys who see us are married? I don’t have the problem because I’m polyamorous and in an open relationship

I have no idea of the marital status of most of my customers, but since men (like women) are not a massive homogenous group whose members all behave exactly the same way, it's easiest to treat people as individuals and take each on his or her own terms .

It's also worth remembering that the last (purported and not easily checked, but it's the best we've got) figure for the proportion of men who punt was 10%, so one in ten. That means nine out of ten don't.