See also the main SAAFE.info site for more Support And Advice For Escorts

Author Topic: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!  (Read 1194 times)

LittleMinx2

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 211
Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« on: 07 February 2025, 12:37:44 am »
So this is a first for me. Long story short, a client I have never seen before, kept ghosting me after making a booking and asking for deposit details. After the 3rd time this happened (I am not normally that lenient but he has seen my friend before) I told him not to book me. This was a week ago. Today he has randomly sent me money and a message saying he looks forward to seeing me. I still don't want to see him though. Do I arrange to send it back?

Mirror

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 7,107
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #1 on: 07 February 2025, 05:41:45 am »
So this is a first for me. Long story short, a client I have never seen before, kept ghosting me after making a booking and asking for deposit details. After the 3rd time this happened (I am not normally that lenient but he has seen my friend before) I told him not to book me. This was a week ago. Today he has randomly sent me money and a message saying he looks forward to seeing me. I still don't want to see him though. Do I arrange to send it back?

Difficult you've been very clear, this is boundary pushing. Three options;

Ignore it see what happens next (if he asks for it back return it)
Send a message saying you've made it clear you don't want to see him, offer to return his money (if he says keep it keep it)
Decide to accept (I've done this sometimes goes well, sometimes doesn't go well (client goes on to push other boundaries)


Lara123

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 42
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #2 on: 07 February 2025, 07:51:26 am »
He's sent the money on purpose- he thinks that because he's paid a deposit you'll have no choice but to accept a booking with him. Refuse to see him and offer to give it back and screenshot everything. Do not see him- this is really weird manipulative behaviour and is a huge red flag.

Patricia

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 82
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #3 on: 07 February 2025, 08:38:07 am »
LittleMinx2 you've stated you don't want to see him and then told him not to book you. He's ignoring what you say and attempting to exert control. If it was me I wouldn't see him.  He may have been ok with your friend but that's no guarantee he'll be ok with you (he hasn't so far)

OverTheHill

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 106
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #4 on: 07 February 2025, 12:48:14 pm »
Manipulative, controlling behaviour.

Decline his booking and offer to refund the money. If he doesn’t want it back, then keep the evidence and block him.

ana30

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 3,734
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #5 on: 07 February 2025, 12:56:01 pm »
Send him back the money, email him with the screenshot and tell him you don't wish too see him nor want further contact with him, then block. Once you've done this you owe him zero explanations.
"Sex work is real work, being a landlord isn't" - Graffitti seen on a wall.

LittleMinx2

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 211
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #6 on: 07 February 2025, 05:10:59 pm »
Thankyou for the responses. I replied explaining that I made it clear that I do not wish to see him and that I can return the money. Knowing this guy, will likely be a week until I get a response. I also was thinking it's a weird power move.

Mirror

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 7,107
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #7 on: 08 February 2025, 09:18:08 am »
Thankyou for the responses. I replied explaining that I made it clear that I do not wish to see him and that I can return the money. Knowing this guy, will likely be a week until I get a response. I also was thinking it's a weird power move.

One problem can be if bank transfer you'll need the sender's details to return the money, I've actually had clients and new bookers not realise this themselves.

I do know what you mean regards power move, I can feel this when someone wants to pay a deposit for a booking they haven't yet made (often because their availability doesn't currently match mine). My fear is that it coukd result in a lot of back and forth or annoyance plus I don't want to lose track of who has paid what, when and what for. Also get some webcam and phone chat punters do this, they send the money as a way of booking instead of asking or telling me the duration, or say they want a video call 'Now' send then tell me it's in 20 minutes time. :FF

LittleMinx2

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 211
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #8 on: 08 February 2025, 07:17:43 pm »
Update! So I managed to get back in touch. He didn't want deposit back, but can't seem to understand that I don't want to see him. Kept spamming me with messages asking if I changed my mind, he can send me more money ect. I've ended up blocking him, as it is just stressing me out.

Mirror

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 7,107
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #9 on: 08 February 2025, 09:16:38 pm »
Update! So I managed to get back in touch. He didn't want deposit back, but can't seem to understand that I don't want to see him. Kept spamming me with messages asking if I changed my mind, he can send me more money ect. I've ended up blocking him, as it is just stressing me out.

Absolutely correct to block him, he is showing what a pusher he is. Can you report him in the warning section and anywhere else suitable?

BBW Jayda

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 139
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #10 on: 08 February 2025, 09:55:03 pm »
I Always say the BLOCK button is your best friend, especially when you're dealing with a nuisance client, just block and don't look back. Simple. Glad to hear you blocked tht boundary pusher.

LittleMinx2

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 211
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #11 on: 09 February 2025, 09:10:17 am »
Absolutely correct to block him, he is showing what a pusher he is. Can you report him in the warning section and anywhere else suitable?

Yes, I will try make a report later on x

DarcyLady

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 487
Re: Refused to see client and they sent me money, help!
« Reply #12 on: 09 February 2025, 12:25:38 pm »
This has happened to me, and I just ignore the guy. I had someone pay a deposit, and then admit that he was off his face on cocaine, so I told him that I wasn't going to be seeing him. He then proceeded to send me MORE money. I still didn't see him, and he did not ask for the money back.  :-X