Hello again!

I have my first dinner date booked and I was wondering if anyone could advise me as to the etiquette of payment. Usually of course I ask for it as soon as the booking starts, but this time he is meeting me in the hotel lobby before proceeding straight to dinner. I cannot think of a subtle way to ask and exchange!

Any advice would be great!

 I took it to mean a normal 'escort' dinner date which would be a combination of social time and private time in whichever order (dinner first isn't my preference, but obviously it's up to the client).

I would not agree to meet a client I hadn't met previously in a public place, and part of the reason (in addition to hanging about like a lemon waiting for somebody who you don't know and with the added possibility of being spotted or photographed) is because payment needs to be made first thing and in private so you can check it without feeling self conscious; I had somebody try to pull a fast one on me a while back like this, and if I had just looked embarrassed and stuffed the money in my bag I would have been stiffed out of ?200. The thread's here somewhere.

You also need to know that everything is OK with the hotel room so you can make your security call properly. I would strongly suggest rearranging so that you arrive at the room just as with any other outcall.

I totally agree with you.  You need to ring the room and make sure he is in it before arriving.

You never know if he is just randomly meeting in a lobby and is then taking you who knows where.  It will only take 5 mins to put your mind at rest.  If it is a "proper" booking, the gentleman should have no problem with that.

Just adding my voice to the chorus - for all the reasons mentioned above, I NEVER meet a new client in a public place. You've got to do timewaster checks on him (and hanging about in a hotel lobby/restaurant/etc looking for someone you've never met before makes that exceptionally challenging, trust me!) and also yes, get the payment up front and checked before you're in public together. And give your security buddy a call, too, cos that's best done after taking payment.

If your new client doesn't mind handing you a wad of cash over the dinner table, which you then count before standing up to ring a friend and say, "Oh yes, he seems fine. Paid alright, no problems. It's gonna be a great booking! Call you when I'm done!" all right in the middle of a fancy restaurant, then fine. But if he's a genuine sort of chap with at least one braincell, he will quickly understand why meeting in private is preferable.

I know sometimes guys have a bit of a fantasy and they want things to be more like a real date. But in that case, I would say that he's free to pay me a 50% deposit by Amazon voucher (I have the most ridiculous list of books and even a fancy camera that I want from there!) and once that's been received, I am perfectly prepared to risk being stood up for the date itself.

As Amy said, though, there's always a chance that someone is trying to set you up and get you out in public so they can watch you and perhaps photograph/film you for God-only-knows what horrid little reasons. Also, if he's a new client, even if he's genuine, you have no idea how he might behave in public - he could show up drunk and start discussing your website details really loudly, or he could bring a friend, or any dreadful scenario you can think of. Best to always meet someone new in quiet surroundings (after doing all your security checks and telling your safety buddy etc, of course!) so that you can suss them out and get the business bit sorted without distractions.

I do agree with the above posts that meeting in a public place can be dicey (I myself got stung in the early days!)
For this booking since you are already at the hotel, insist on meeting at the hotel room! That way you can be paid in private and feel relaxed and safer.
For general dinner date bookings this might be useful :
Try to meet at the hotel room first as already suggested, if that's not realistic,( and it isn't always because they are a timewaster, sometimes I can understand if they don't want to meet at the hotel i.e. if you are not eating at the hotel and the resturant isn't nearby etc) then I tell the client in advance I will require payment on within the first few minutes of arrival at the resturant. I tell them they can either pay by way of an envelope discreetly placed in the menu and passed to me, or by placing the cash in a gift bag - it looks perfectly innocent to other diners   So when you arrive, you should then expect the payment (they have been warned!) If needs be gently remind them if there's no sign/mention. If they are not happy with this prior, don't go on the booking and if when you arrive and  they make excuses or say they will pay at the hotel, leave immediately! Be on your guard and definately do all the background checks into their hotel room, call them when they check in too prior to meeting to ensure they really have got a hotel. It might also be helpful to find out how they propose to get to the hotel afterwards -(personally I prefer a cab and would not be very keen on client driving or walking back)
Hope this help, stay safe Loloxxx

I second Amy on this!

I have one on daft occasion opted for discretion over thoroughness and found myself holding a few less twenties than I should have 

Hi Ruby,

How did it go? Any pointers for me before accepting to do same thing?