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Author Topic: Payment before or after the meeting?  (Read 2996 times)

Kitty07

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Payment before or after the meeting?
« on: 26 October 2024, 07:28:55 pm »
First time I saw a client, I was told that it was common to get money AFTER the deed and that doing it without penetration was the norm. I’m much older and less naive now.
I was in the US for a while and over there, they screen and get money upfront. I’m assuming the same is the same for the UK or do you girls get money at the end of the meet?

I’m like a born-again escort so sorry if this is a silly question. If there’s anything that is UK specific that I should know please let me know as a lot of the info I know is US-centric.

Many thanks

amy

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #1 on: 26 October 2024, 09:15:07 pm »
Always before - ALWAYS.

I don't know who told you otherwise (although I can probably guess), but never, ever trust them to give you money after they've had a free service; why would they?

Have you read the main SAAFE site? There is a fair bit of general information there, but the main difference between here and the US is that you're not breaking the law :D

xw5

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #2 on: 26 October 2024, 09:20:57 pm »
First words of the sex work bible:

Get. The. Money. First.
'The Ian formerly known as SW5'. What they said: "Indispensable", "You are our best resource", and (hours later!) "I'm afraid that you're being made redundant..."

Mirror

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #3 on: 27 October 2024, 05:09:08 am »
First time I saw a client, I was told that it was common to get money AFTER the deed and that doing it without penetration was the norm. I’m much older and less naive now.
I was in the US for a while and over there, they screen and get money upfront. I’m assuming the same is the same for the UK or do you girls get money at the end of the meet?

I’m like a born-again escort so sorry if this is a silly question. If there’s anything that is UK specific that I should know please let me know as a lot of the info I know is US-centric.

Many thanks
Before.

Some punters may tell you it's a sign of trust or the normal to pay afterwards. I've had enough 'mistakes' and difficult situations even with long term regulars, and or punters who have counted the money several times before they put it in their envelope/pocket/wallet/hand to definitely take the money upfront.
« Last Edit: 27 October 2024, 07:18:01 am by Mirror »

V24

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #4 on: 27 October 2024, 07:44:51 am »
 
 Defintely first.  I even get money off regulars first.   Had been seeing a guy for years and after a while he started paying at the end, all was great until one day we had the 'forgot my money' crap and he was never to be seen again.  So I don't care how regular they are they don't get to pay after

Mirror

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #5 on: 27 October 2024, 09:09:28 am »

 Defintely first.  I even get money off regulars first.   Had been seeing a guy for years and after a while he started paying at the end, all was great until one day we had the 'forgot my money' crap and he was never to be seen again.  So I don't care how regular they are they don't get to pay after

Sometimes the only way I have been aware the client wants a different (usually shorter) booking is when I counted the money at the start, if I had left it on the side or not counted I would have given half an hour for free. Also actually had a regular and myself forget, and discovered a sellotaped ripped note in a pile counted after I had left.

Start and count.

Patricia

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #6 on: 27 October 2024, 10:05:02 am »
I never had a problem with this in my first few years and always and without exception received correct payment before session began BUT 🙄 then  one day for unknown reason I forgot he hadn't paid and I forgot to ask (I must have been distracted) so was half way through the hour with a new client and realisation dawned. No fee.
OMG in my head I was panicking as didn't feel able to stop and ask. Anyway resigned myself to whatever the outcome. The relief when he put the full fee on the bed before leaving!!  He was a one off booking  so didnt have to deal with a next time chat about paying up front.  Never again no matter if new or long term reg. I've had the odd one where they haven't volunteered the fee so been prompted and it's been fine.
 

Mirror

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #7 on: 27 October 2024, 10:19:10 am »
I never had a problem with this in my first few years and always and without exception received correct payment before session began BUT 🙄 then  one day for unknown reason I forgot he hadn't paid and I forgot to ask (I must have been distracted) so was half way through the hour with a new client and realisation dawned. No fee.
OMG in my head I was panicking as didn't feel able to stop and ask. Anyway resigned myself to whatever the outcome. The relief when he put the full fee on the bed before leaving!!  He was a one off booking  so didnt have to deal with a next time chat about paying up front.  Never again no matter if new or long term reg. I've had the odd one where they haven't volunteered the fee so been prompted and it's been fine.

I have all sorts of stories one of us is either lucky or unlucky, but every so often something happens that reminds me why I need to take and count at the start in front of the client.

For the OP if you do ever accept bank transfers or any other electronic payment, you need to be sure it's in your account, viewable or useable by you using your own gadget or app. There can be delays no matter what some will tell you, and some may present you with a very plausible false transfer screen.

Kitty07

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #8 on: 27 October 2024, 10:42:59 am »
Always before - ALWAYS.

I don't know who told you otherwise (although I can probably guess), but never, ever trust them to give you money after they've had a free service; why would they?

Have you read the main SAAFE site? There is a fair bit of general information there, but the main difference between here and the US is that you're not breaking the law :D

It was a really bad client. I saw him once more after the initial visit and he ended up r*ping me, cutting the date short because I wouldn’t do anal and underpaid me (said that I must’ve dropped the money). Luckily I still have his number in case I want to go the police but yeah, money upfront! I’ll check out the main site as well for info, thanks xx

Brandybrown69

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #9 on: 31 October 2024, 10:43:37 pm »
Always before just like when your food shopping you pay before leaving the supermarket you dont take the food home eat it and then pay lol xx

Dani The Masseuse

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #10 on: 02 November 2024, 09:55:22 am »
In this country, it's always before.  It was very odd for me to take money upfront, but the men here are absolute chancers.  I don't bother counting it, if they're going to shortpay me, I won't see them again. There's a limit to just how classless I'll be.

amy

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #11 on: 02 November 2024, 11:18:46 am »
There's a limit to just how classless I'll be.

I don't understand this, at least not in the context of counting cash exchanged for goods/services? I've never paid for anything anywhere with cash and had it just tossed in a till without it being checked, and I don't see what either way has to do with class. Could you elaborate?

Dani The Masseuse

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #12 on: 02 November 2024, 01:11:11 pm »
I don't understand this, at least not in the context of counting cash exchanged for goods/services? I've never paid for anything anywhere with cash and had it just tossed in a till without it being checked, and I don't see what either way has to do with class. Could you elaborate?
Yes. I'm used to wealthy men who would never underpay/not pay a working girl. So it's already embarrassing that I have to ask for the money upfront and I'm not counting it like they're buying sweets and alcohol from Carters. If it's the only way you're used to working, I'm sure it feels normal. I'll rather lose a few quid, as I expect my men to have class and manners. The most I'll do is peek inside an envelope to make sure it's cash and not Tesco vouchers,  apologising all the time.  I'm very seldom underpaid.  But an uncouth yob might make his way through my screening. He won't see me again though.

Mirror

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #13 on: 02 November 2024, 02:58:04 pm »
Yes. I'm used to wealthy men who would never underpay/not pay a working girl. So it's already embarrassing that I have to ask for the money upfront and I'm not counting it like they're buying sweets and alcohol from Carters. If it's the only way you're used to working, I'm sure it feels normal. I'll rather lose a few quid, as I expect my men to have class and manners. The most I'll do is peek inside an envelope to make sure it's cash and not Tesco vouchers,  apologising all the time.  I'm very seldom underpaid.  But an uncouth yob might make his way through my screening. He won't see me again though.

The men who have underpaid me or given me torn or out of circulation notes haven't been yobs, they've mostly been wealthy or comfortably well off, polite, often well educated, sometimes professional occupation middle aged and late middle-aged men. Some have been genuine counting mistakes (I know them well enough and they I that I know they wouldn't want to risk a scene or lose their next booking), these now insist on paying upfront and want me to count in front of them.Others I don't know because they've a history of boundary pushing ever so slightly be it a first booking at which the under pay happened, or a few bookings down the line. The only time I don't count is for clients who have spent A LOT on numerous repeat long bookings, and who do not push boundaries in any other way including don't expect over runs or favours, one in particular let's me have time out during the booking and has taken me out to places I have thoroughly enjoyed and benefited from. I do count asap after the booking. Some of my clients insist I count upfront which is perfect but one of my bug bears is this can take a while if they then talk to me whilst I am trying to count.

DarcyLady

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Re: Payment before or after the meeting?
« Reply #14 on: 02 November 2024, 07:04:13 pm »
Yes. I'm used to wealthy men who would never underpay/not pay a working girl. So it's already embarrassing that I have to ask for the money upfront and I'm not counting it like they're buying sweets and alcohol from Carters. If it's the only way you're used to working, I'm sure it feels normal. I'll rather lose a few quid, as I expect my men to have class and manners. The most I'll do is peek inside an envelope to make sure it's cash and not Tesco vouchers,  apologising all the time.  I'm very seldom underpaid.  But an uncouth yob might make his way through my screening. He won't see me again though.

I have been underpaid by wealthy men, who I would always presume wouldn't underpay me. Bit rude to us girls that do count too  :-X It's got nothing to do with class.