I think men are sometimes rough with us ladies because they like harder handling themselves (i mean have you ever seen the way most men masturbate? they look like they are about to pull the damm thing off) so they assume that being rough will really work,i think porn has a lot to answer for as well cos the women in them are usually being handled quite harshly and appearing to love it!
I just tell clients that are rough that im sensitive and love a gentle touch and then i show them what feels better,most follow your lead and with the few that have refused too ive just taken their hand away and distracted them with something else.
I never have orgasms with clients,im a tough nut to crack at the best of times
and i dont think i could ever be relaxed and secure enough for that to happen. Also (and i know some of you will think im mad) but i have a boyfriend who i love very much and having orgasams with clients would feel wrong for me somehow,almost as if im giving away a piece of myself that i dont want to.
probably silly i know.