SAAFE forum
General Category => Questions and Answers => Topic started by: Londonpartygirl on 16 June 2017, 04:21:16 am
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So I am touring in New York, and I met this guy tonight who I caught filming me.
This guy works in finance, and I went to his stunning multi-million $ flat in SoHo. So if you get my drift, and not boasting because this ended up being one of the worst nights of escorting in my entire time doing this, I don't think he wanted to make money from filming.
I don't know when the filming started, but I went to use his bathroom to freshen up. I tried to put my things on his dresser but he kept moving them around to the site. I think deep instinctually this alerted me...along with him standing directly in front of his bed.
After this, we started kissing, and slowly undressing - in the corner of my eye I saw what looked like a camera lens under a pile of folded clothes. I didn't want to sound paranoid, so I pretended to get something from my bag and I noticed it was actually a lens. I lifted up the clothes to find a fancy camcorder.
I confronted this about him and proceeded to tell him to give me the camera to delete the scene. He was fumbling around. I was trembling like crazy. We finally deleted it off the camcorder - but as you know you can retrieve these files back if you want.
I was crying and upset. I confronted him to tell him how he could he do this to me? He wanted me to leave and pushed me out. He said it was just for him to watch afterwards. I found a letter with his real name in the flat, in case I needed his real details.
I'm terrified because I do this so discreetly, I don't show my face at all. Do you think I can take his word for it? I think he has a lot to loose since he would be in the video kissing, and there was only a little stripping. But now I am scared he will out me.
I need a rational voice ladies, I've been having severe anxiety chest pains since it happens and no one to turn to here.
Thank you ever so much in advance.
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Hi there
First of all I'm so sorry this has happened to you. It happened to me with a long-term regular only a year or two ago. The shock was immense. The only thing I can say is that hopefully he's only done it for his own gratification, and won't take the steps to out you. There's not a lot you can do because if you demand further action to destroy his camera/harddrive whatever there's no way of checking it's not somewhere else.
Report him to Ugly Mugs.
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Or send him a letter to his name and address and let him know that any use of that recording would get him into a lot of legal trouble. This will have him shit on his pants and will think twice before pulling the stunt with another girl next time. Don't write your name on the letter. He's probably not going to do anything with that video specially because there's no hot sex or anyhting, I would relax about this if I were you. A lot of guys do this to watch after and jerk off to it. What a di--k doing it without your consent, he's actually breaking the law. Report this guy to ugly mugs and other sex workers network because ladies should be warned about him.
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Or send him a letter to his name and address and let him know that any use of that recording would get him into a lot of legal trouble. This will have him shit on his pants and will think twice before pulling the stunt with another girl next time. Don't write your name on the letter. He's probably not going to do anything with that video specially because there's no hot sex or anyhting, I would relax about this if I were you. A lot of guys do this to watch after and jerk off to it. What a di--k doing it without your consent, he's actually breaking the law. Report this guy to ugly mugs and other sex workers network because ladies should be warned about him.
Bang on. This is what I would do.
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This is fucking awful !! My worst nightmare .Sorry this happened xxx
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Go to the police explain and say he shoved you out too , they are really hot on this stuff now , also I would email him and mention the night and say your worried it's not been deleted, be really nice , go over how upset you were details etc and your shock as it had not been arranged and you don't allow filming and screenshot or print reply .
They will be good , honestly I'm sure as I've said before someone just posted my friends name on facebook and their not even a member, police deleted immediately and gave them a house call !!!
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Go to the police explain and say he shoved you out too , they are really hot on this stuff now , also I would email him and mention the night and say your worried it's not been deleted, be really nice , go over how upset you were details etc and your shock as it had not been arranged and you don't allow filming and screenshot or print reply .
They will be good , honestly I'm sure as I've said before someone just posted my friends name on facebook and their not even a member, police deleted immediately and gave them a house call !!!
I am not sure if you caught the bit where she's touring in the States. But I would definitely not recommend going to the police in places where prostitution is illegal. As it stands, going to the police may worsen the situation and pose problems should she wish to return to the US.
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Go to the police explain and say he shoved you out too , they are really hot on this stuff now , also I would email him and mention the night and say your worried it's not been deleted, be really nice , go over how upset you were details etc and your shock as it had not been arranged and you don't allow filming and screenshot or print reply .
They will be good , honestly I'm sure as I've said before someone just posted my friends name on facebook and their not even a member, police deleted immediately and gave them a house call !!!
Going to the police? No way! She's in the states, what she was doing was illegal (prostitution), she'll get arrested.
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I've just realised the legal issue.
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Thanks so much for all your kind words,
If this was in the UK I would have gone straight to the police, no issues. It's apparently called Stephanies Law.
Given the toss of being arrested, and my pictures plastered on the internet I would probably prefer to be arrested...
The guy has told me to move on with my life and the files really were deleted, but this is the guy who was filming undercover...you cant trust him.
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I'm really sorry you've been through this. I haven't (to my knowledge) had a client do this but I have been almost outed so I do empathise.
I can't add anything really, just hope the shit has properly deleted it and nothing more will come out of it, I also hope you've got some good support over there.
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I am not sure if you caught the bit where she's touring in the States. But I would definitely not recommend going to the police in places where prostitution is illegal. As it stands, going to the police may worsen the situation and pose problems should she wish to return to the US.
Shite no sorry missed that , often assume it's uk , my mistake bloody hell apologies , only just logged on !
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I'm sorry this happened to you its happened to me I felt totally violated and sick these people are weirdos the fact that he was aggressive to just shows his disrespect towards women horrible specimen of the male species hugs to you
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Jesus Christ what an assh*ole... send him a letter explaining that any use will result in you bringing legal action against him. Sorry to hear you had to go through this.
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Sorry this happened to you! I agree with writing him a letter or an email, stating his full name and letting him know that if he attempts to distribute the content in anyway he will be in big trouble.
This should be enough to scare him off, having his real name is an advantage for you, and by telling him you know who he is and that you'll report him he will sure as hell know not to do anything like that again. X
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He violated US law by filming you in a place where you had a "right to expect privacy" without your consent. However, you were both in violation of US law when he made and you accepted the booking. Here in the US an officer only needs "probably cause" (something that leads him to believe you were engaging in prostitution) to arrest you.
I know it's worrisome, but I would personally let it go rather than risk having it snowball. We all may have been filmed at some point and the chances of us finding it online are not always good--too many places to look and not all are public.
I'm so sorry. I think he's a huge ass and I would feel violated and angry, but I wouldn't risk getting arrested. Just my .02.
Mandy
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Thanks so much for all your kind words,
If this was in the UK I would have gone straight to the police, no issues. It's apparently called Stephanies Law.
Given the toss of being arrested, and my pictures plastered on the internet I would probably prefer to be arrested...
The guy has told me to move on with my life and the files really were deleted, but this is the guy who was filming undercover...you cant trust him.
I've just googled that & it's a US law.
I'm regretting not reporting a guy for filming me & another for taking photos to the police. I probably still could as it happened within the last 8 weeks. The screen was white on his phone so there's seems to be some clever technology now to conceal filming. It's so concerning.
Next one that tries it will have their phone smashed against the nearest wall. I'm done being nice to scum.
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Or send him a letter to his name and address and let him know that any use of that recording would get him into a lot of legal trouble. This will have him shit on his pants and will think twice before pulling the stunt with another girl next time. Don't write your name on the letter. He's probably not going to do anything with that video specially because there's no hot sex or anyhting, I would relax about this if I were you. A lot of guys do this to watch after and jerk off to it. What a di--k doing it without your consent, he's actually breaking the law. Report this guy to ugly mugs and other sex workers network because ladies should be warned about him.
+ 1 hugs
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I am not sure if you caught the bit where she's touring in the States. But I would definitely not recommend going to the police in places where prostitution is illegal. As it stands, going to the police may worsen the situation and pose problems should she wish to return to the US.
No totally missed soz !
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I thought the USA you would screen the person so you would know his legal name prior even to showing up, do a check on them that especially they are not potentially a cop etc when you show up at the address ask to be shown ID to prove they are who they say they are. Also if for the most part people know you and advisably another security buddy know exactly where you are, what time you are supposed to be back and who exactly you are meeting, generally speaking, though not always people would tend to behave themselves more. This I feel because they have left a much more easier trackable trail. Sorry it happened though some people are just arseholes. Send him a letter like others have suggested though for the most apart a bit of consolation if he lives in such a wealthy accomodation/ he can afford such a place and he hardly got the chance to capture anything very compromising I do not think he would be putting it online. Still report to online sexworker forums and warning sites for providers though.
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I?m so sorry to hear about this!! Some clients really do ruin it for others :FF
I think you need to look at this logically. So I?m gunna try help :)
- why are you worried about the film? Because you were escorting or just because you met an older guy (assuming he was older than you) and he filmed some kissing/stripping , no sex
- this could have just been an ordinary date with someone you met and he could have set you up
- if the film did get out, which it probably won?t, what will it actually prove? Not a lot considering you didn?t have sex. It would have shown you noticing the camera too, which doesn?t go for good film making, and even if he cut the end out what would footage would he have? Not much reallly, some kissing, stripping and an abrupt end.
- I?m guessing you are not from the states, you are from UK? So even in worst case scenario and he did put the footage online, the chances of anyone ever finding it, considering how tame the footage is, are very very slim! I know that?s horrible to think but it?s true. There?s millions of porn content on the net already. The chances of anyone ever finding it are slim.
I don?t think this guy will post it online anyway. He probably wanted it for his wank bank. The fact that you?ve caught him and deleted it has probably put him off anyway. I?m not sure he?d go to the effort to recover the footage, especially with no sex parts
As others have said, I think sending a letter to his home with his real name will be enough to stop him doing anything silly with it and it will show him you know who is he. Express in the letter that the footage was taken without your consent and that you never give permission to use it or share it.
Keep your chin up!! Xxx