now the first reply i got was if you are expecting brad pitt to turn up, it ent gonna happen
No, I don't think it was - I think it's saying that good looks don't necessarily lead to a good attitude or a good time, and vice versa. You need to look beyond the face, beyond the body, and at the person and their attitude.
The thing that particularly reminds me of this each time I see it is the face of a particular serial killer who operated on the London gay scene a some years ago. If he'd cruised me (i.e. attempted to pick me up) when I was looking for casual sex with another man, I'd have said yes, and I know other men who've said the same thing. He looked great, but going with him was often fatal.
as to etiquette does a guy just turn up and pressume the booking will go ahead or do they come here with a no pressure attitude like in the swinging world which i am more used to
Yes, money alters people's expectations.
Single men in the swinging scene tend to be grateful that you're interested. As a single woman, you get to pick and choose. If they're paying a small pile of money to be with you, they don't expect to be judged quite so much on things like looks. They're basically paying so you will have sex with them (and go away again afterwards).
That doesn't mean if they've got a crap attitude - if they don't wash, or refuse to respect boundaries, or whatever - that you shouldn't kick them out.
I specialise in helping people explore new things. In many cases, that's because they've been unable, for one reason or another, to have a partner who'd do 'that' with them. Sometimes, I can see why: they do not fit society's view of what an attractive person looks like. But almost without exception, they've been lovely people, and we've both had a good time.