SAAFE forum
General Category => Questions and Answers => Topic started by: Love.Sex.Dreams on 04 July 2020, 12:31:13 pm
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So I have had a lot of work done on my bum (3 Brazilian Butt Lifts). It was fairly big to begin with (runs in the family), before. Now it looks very very big (think Kim Kardashian/Blac Chyna). I tell clients it's natural and also write it on my profile, partly because I feel embarrassed to admit that I willingly did something so ridiculous to myself. I had my surgeries during a time I was not well mentally and was being abused by my narcissistic mother. I think I had body dysmorphia or something. I wanted attention so badly because I was neglected at home. I started escorting after my first BBL as I saw how quickly I could raise money for more surgery through escorting.
I also lie to clients because I feel like it's not their right to know about the work I have had done. Some believe it's natural and some don't question anything. Recently I had a rude young guy. We finished the session and he started asking me about it. He goes; "how many BBLs have you done?". I was like' "huh". Then he said, "come on, you don't have to lie". I told him that I am genetically predisposed to have it so big since I am African. He then started poking and prodding it. Acting so entitled, saying he has to know. I told him he was being rude. I felt really angry and violated by this.
Am I too sensitive? Do you also lie? I liken this to a client probing and pushing to know my real name. That's my number 2 pet peeve
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I know a lot of people will disagree with me, but I think it's silly and possibly counterproductive, or worse, to lie about anything like this. So many escorts lie about their age, country of origin, cosmetic surgery, dress size etc. etc., and it makes us all look duplicitous or even scammers.
Conversely, I think we are 100% entitled to keep anything to do with our private lives private, so anyone asking my real name would get short shrift.
In this case, I don't think it would be wrong to not mention the BBLs on your profile, but if a client asked I would be honest and say yes - making a flirty joke about it possibly. No need to lie or be sensitive about it IMO.
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I've had enhancements and plastic surgery. I refuse to answer any questions about it from clients or callers. They have zero rights to my medical history.
I've experienced the same disrespectful grabbing and pulling for signs of surgery and slap clients hard but make out like it's playful. They quickly come to their senses and know they've passed a dangerous boundary. I grip their wrist, slap forcefully 2-3 times in a slow, controlled manner with a smile on my face. No anger.
It's totally shame inducing and effective because I've taken control of their body and treated them like a naughty child. It's a punishment I performed at live adult shows where there'd usually be one or two hopeful grabbers.They never tried it twice.
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Think about it the other way round, would you squeeze a clients nose and go: "You have quite a small unnatural looking nose Joe, how many nose surgeries have you had?", then laugh in his face when he looks astonished and tells you his nose is "natural". Very rude and intrusive.
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So I have had a lot of work done on my bum (3 Brazilian Butt Lifts). It was fairly big to begin with (runs in the family), before. Now it looks very very big (think Kim Kardashian/Blac Chyna). I tell clients it's natural and also write it on my profile, partly because I feel embarrassed to admit that I willingly did something so ridiculous to myself. I had my surgeries during a time I was not well mentally and was being abused by my narcissistic mother. I think I had body dysmorphia or something. I wanted attention so badly because I was neglected at home. I started escorting after my first BBL as I saw how quickly I could raise money for more surgery through escorting.
I also lie to clients because I feel like it's not their right to know about the work I have had done. Some believe it's natural and some don't question anything. Recently I had a rude young guy. We finished the session and he started asking me about it. He goes; "how many BBLs have you done?". I was like' "huh". Then he said, "come on, you don't have to lie". I told him that I am genetically predisposed to have it so big since I am African. He then started poking and prodding it. Acting so entitled, saying he has to know. I told him he was being rude. I felt really angry and violated by this.
Am I too sensitive? Do you also lie? I liken this to a client probing and pushing to know my real name. That's my number 2 pet peeve
It’s totally up to you what you do. It’s your profile. Your business and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. You know as soon as you admit to it being surgically enhanced they will write it all over the escort forums and then you will he called a liar. So best to pick a story and Stick to it. He can’t get your medical records.
If you say to someone it’s natural and they start boundary pushing and being rude I would of snapped at that guy that his time was up and please leave as your insulting me. Not every girl with a big ass has had a BBL.
I’m not interested in what clients think or how much lying to them would affect their feelings. Sorry they come in the room like what they see and pay their money. That’s it as far as I’m concerned.
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I know a lot of people will disagree with me, but I think it's silly and possibly counterproductive, or worse, to lie about anything like this. So many escorts lie about their age, country of origin, cosmetic surgery, dress size etc. etc., and it makes us all look duplicitous or even scammers.
I agree, but this is not the OP's case. I'm sure her "large derriere" is nicely portrayed on her ads as part of her selling point (lots of men love have a large butt fetish) and comes as no surprise when client arrives. It's not like she's advertising as having a small butt then "Ta-dam..Big surprise!". There's no misleading element here.
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My opinion is based on myself having similar to you but without the surgery. Thing is you have to own it, You need to except and embrace yourself and the reasons you had the surgery and that young guy was just that, young and dumb and no filter in his poor head. People can tell surgery most of the time and so what, Its very common these days. It's your body and regardless of enhanced surgery you demand respect and acceptance from yourself first and others will follow and if they don't then so what. I'll never rule out surgery but knowing about how body dysmorphia works, Having had it and how it makes you see flaws and the anxiety to fix these flaws. Thankfully I have stopped myself from getting work, Once I was convinced I needed a full face lift at 37 lol. if I get stuff done it's for my satisfaction and I won't lie or feel the need to tell anyone straight out.
Thing is your lucky to have had that kind of surgery and no complications. And regarding profile you don't need to say if your beautiful bum is natural or not, Let the pictures talk and then you are not lying. Most of us try and get pics at our best angels but when a client meets us close up and at less flattering Angels it's just real life and real bodies and women.
Also just imagine that guy that prodded you and imagine what you could of picked at about him and prodded his bits lol He was most probably insecure and felt he needed to say what he did to push your buttons. I've had it done to me and I told the guy to leave and to never say anything like what he said to me to another woman.
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I agree. I'm a professional performer selling a fantasy creation, barely any advertised details about me are 'real'.
To me it's an acting gig not a truthfest.
Likewise, Daniel Craig probably has little in common with James Bond.
(Kay, you smartly anticipated, people would disagree...we all work differently, true.)
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I agree, but this is not the OP's case. I'm sure her "large derriere" is nicely portrayed on her ads as part of her selling point (lots of men love have a large butt fetish) and comes as no surprise when client arrives. It's not like she's advertising as having a small butt then "Ta-dam..Big surprise!". There's no misleading element here.
No, but the issue is denying/lying about having the surgery - I just don't see the point of not being honest about it. If you have surgery, why be ashamed about it?
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It's passive-aggressive at best and plain old aggression at worst.
Grabbing at you?! Cheeky fucker..
Grab his bollocks and suggest he has a nip and tuck down there >:(
I have had the same. A cursory flick at my breasts whilst demanding, "So how much did these cost you then?" (I usually tell them it was just another day at 'the office' Shuts them up, because they believe we shag 50 men a day ::))
AS if they really care! They Just want you to know that they Know they are fake (no shit Sherlock, it says so all over my profile ::))
No, I would never lie about it personally, but just because I think it's too obvious on myself...
But in your case I think you could get away with it? 🤔
Are there any obvious stitches during Doggy for example?
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No, but the issue is denying/lying about having the surgery - I just don't see the point of not being honest about it. If you have surgery, why be ashamed about it?
Because this is very personal information that you may or may not want to share with strangers met over the internet Kay. I also don;t see the point of being honest with clients about having children or spending your christmas holidays in Bath, not because I'm ashamed of those two things but because I need to maintain personal boundaries with clients, and those boundaries are built on what I chose to disclose about my private life and whatnot. It's not a matter of being ashamed it's a matter of "mind your feking business".
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Because this is very personal information that you may or may not want to share with strangers met over the internet Kay. I also don;t see the point of being honest with clients about having children or spending your christmas holidays in Bath, not because I'm ashamed of those two things but because I need to maintain personal boundaries with clients, and those boundaries are built on what I chose to disclose about my private life and whatnot. It's not a matter of being ashamed it's a matter of "mind your feking business".
But having had children or not (hopefully!!) or spending your Christmases in Bath are not likely to be factors in clients' decisions to see a particular escort. Whereas whether she has fake or natural boobs, a butt lift, Botoxed to fuck forehead, trout pout, tummy tuck scars, tattoos etc. are. As we're in effect selling our looks, surely it behoves us to be honest about them?
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But having had children or not (hopefully!!) or spending your Christmases in Bath are not likely to be factors in clients' decisions to see a particular escort. Whereas whether she has fake or natural boobs, a butt lift, Botoxed to fuck forehead, trout pout, tummy tuck scars, tattoos etc. are. As we're in effect selling our looks, surely it behoves us to be honest about them?
Dunno... but if I'm a guy with a "large butt fetish" and I see an ad of beautiful lady with a Kim kardashian derriere i don;t think I'll be thinking "Hmm...maybe she's had a couple of fat injections so I'd rather not see her" or "maybe her forehead is too smooth so I'll cancel my appointment as most probaly she's had some botox", or "her tummy is too flat, she may have had liposuction yikes!". Of course there's some plastic surgery that is difficult to hide like some breast augmentation surgeries that are so painfully obvious and it may turn some guys off, so it may good to disclose beforehand, but body enhancement surgery that you can't tell (and there's a lot of it) it's up to the lady to disclose it to a stranger or not. It depends on how blatantly obvious it is I guess. I had nose surgery many years ago (not noticeable) and don't feel the need to disclose it to strangers because it's not relevant.
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I know a lot of people will disagree with me, but I think it's silly and possibly counterproductive, or worse, to lie about anything like this. So many escorts lie about their age, country of origin, cosmetic surgery, dress size etc. etc., and it makes us all look duplicitous or even scammers.
Conversely, I think we are 100% entitled to keep anything to do with our private lives private, so anyone asking my real name would get short shrift.
In this case, I don't think it would be wrong to not mention the BBLs on your profile, but if a client asked I would be honest and say yes - making a flirty joke about it possibly. No need to lie or be sensitive about it IMO.
Got to agree with this. The vast majority of my clients love my natural breasts and mention they don't like fake ones. I'm guessing it's one of the reasons they book me (that and my natural hairy parts).
There are clients for everyone regardless of whether you've had surgery or not. I can't comment on bums as I have no idea but with breasts or any surgery that is obvious (huge trout pout) then it's bound to appeal to a variety of clients so why not be truthful.
I find a lot of clients just generally nosey about a lot of things. I just laugh it off or answer vaguely if I can be arsed.
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No, but the issue is denying/lying about having the surgery - I just don't see the point of not being honest about it. If you have surgery, why be ashamed about it?
I'm pretty sure no one's said they're ashamed?
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I'm pretty sure no one's said they're ashamed?
They haven't, but it's difficult to figure out why anyone would lie otherwise (and I'm talking specifically about outright lies when asked directly, not just telling the asker to mind their own business or failing to mention it at all). What purpose does the lying serve, and if there isn't one then why bother unless they think that cosmetic surgery is undesirable or unseemly in some way?
If the purpose is to get bookings (and money) that they might not have got otherwise, then it's misleading potential customers and some people are uncomfortable with that, partly because it makes things that bit more difficult and annoying for those of us who don't do it, and partly because it could be seen as trying to give themselves an unfair advantage over others which doesn't sit well with everyone.
There are two separate issues in the OP though - any punter who behaves so rudely deserves to be thrown out on his arse and blocked. If somebody pinched and grabbed my tits while asking if they were real he'd get one warning to pack it in and then it's booking over even if he'd barely.got his shoes off.
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But having had children or not (hopefully!!) or spending your Christmases in Bath are not likely to be factors in clients' decisions to see a particular escort. Whereas whether she has fake or natural boobs, a butt lift, Botoxed to fuck forehead, trout pout, tummy tuck scars, tattoos etc. are. As we're in effect selling our looks, surely it behoves us to be honest about them?
No way when he walks in if he doesn’t like what he sees he can walk out and leave. The op said this conversation was after he had had his fun with her. He had an amazing time and to me he sounds like he wanted this confirmed so he could go and write it on a review sight. That could of lost her money in the long run.
Too much worrying about what the client thinks of you and your body will cause you mental health problems. And we are here to stick together not to tell women off for not revealing their life stories about how they got scars on their body etc.
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If the purpose is to get bookings (and money) that they might not have got otherwise, then it's misleading potential customers and some people are uncomfortable with that, partly because it makes things that bit more difficult and annoying for those of us who don't do it, and partly because it could be seen as trying to give themselves an unfair advantage over others which doesn't sit well with everyone.
To be honest I can't care less if the OP hides her butt enhancement confession from clients or if jenny with balloon size tits tell her punters "they're natural". It's not going to annoy me nor affect my bank account in any way.
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No way when he walks in if he doesn’t like what he sees he can walk out and leave. The op said this conversation was after he had had his fun with her. He had an amazing time and to me he sounds like he wanted this confirmed so he could go and write it on a review sight. That could of lost her money in the long run.
Too much worrying about what the client thinks of you and your body will cause you mental health problems. And we are here to stick together not to tell women off for not revealing their life stories about how they got scars on their body etc.
I'm not 'telling anyone off', just giving my opinion. False marketing creates problems - as the OP has outlined - and means you might have to deal with more walkouts, bad feedback etc., plus it has a knock-on effect on all escorts because it amplifies the idea that we all lie about our age and dress sizes etc.
I very much agree with the bit in bold, and that's why I think if you have cosmetic surgery, 'owning it' is the best and healthiest tactic.
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That client is a jerk.
I would simply own it put it on your profile that way you will have the clientele that are fine with such and not attract those who only want non surgical booty. Less hassle headache for you and if someone does turn up who then gets in a huff and puff at least you were clear on your page and they should of gone with someone that does not have type of booty you have.
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Oh I see Amy. I don't lie, I refuse to answer.
I have 30 wigs which probably gives me an unfair advantage as does the surgery-I'm creating illusions.
Magicians don't usually reveal their tricks.
Clients are attracted to the illusion in the photos, the experience matches their expectations and they have a blast. Win Win.
Besides....The Cyborg Code of Conduct prevents disclosure to humanlings.
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That client is a twat.
I think it depends on how obvious the surgery is. If it's something that is subtle then I can't see any reason to disclose. But if it's something very obvious like big fake boobs or lots of different procedures that are clear to see then it should be mentioned in advance so clients can make their mind up and you get the clients that like the way YOU look. I can't say for the buttlift as to whether it's obvious, I don't know enough about it.
Sometimes it's about the way something feels isn't it, not just the look. But there are clients for all types of shape and size so I guess if something is too obvious to deny then best to be honest. Many clients like the enhanced look, just as many like the natural look.
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I'm not 'telling anyone off', just giving my opinion. False marketing creates problems - as the OP has outlined - and means you might have to deal with more walkouts, bad feedback etc., plus it has a knock-on effect on all escorts because it amplifies the idea that we all lie about our age and dress sizes etc.
I very much agree with the bit in bold, and that's why I think if you have cosmetic surgery, 'owning it' is the best and healthiest tactic.
She has a big derrière in her pictures and that’s what attracted him to book her. It’s none of his business how the big derrière got there.
Also don’t care what clients think of us lying they lie to their wives and kids all day long. We aren’t in this to be moral we are in it to earn money!
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I agree with Blondie - It’s none of his business, he had his fun.
I saw someone last week (my first in lockdown) he was very persuasive! Anyway he slipped up and mentioned he was a prolific reviewer and would write a marvellous review about me but not now after lockdown! He gave me compliments throughout. After Funtime he mentioned how my age is mentioned a lot and I could see he wanted an answer - I didn’t lie I smiled and told him time was up.
Regarding the review I told him it was best for both of us if he didn’t write anything.
Op - You do what your comfortable with - It’s your body your rules what you want to disclose.
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I've seen ladies with a big natural booty and ladies with brazilian butt lift, call me thick but I cannot tell the diference (unless it's botched). I've also seen breasts that never in a million years I would have guessed they were surgically enhanced (because of how naturally they looked), so if the surgeries are natural looking and not obvious I don't see th eneed to disclose (unless you want to of course). I believe it would be considered "misleading" if you photoshop a double D cup in your ads and it turns out you're a B cup.
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I have had quite a few surgeries and wouldn't lie about it. Especially directly to someone's face. The thing is if you've had three BBLs plus a naturally large bum to begin with it probably is quite obvious that it's not natural. So to then lie when they ask you is just going to give them a bad impression of you imo. There's no reason to be ashamed and I wouldn't want someone who loved a natural look to be misled into booking me and be disappointed.
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Hey sometimes ya have to do it sweetie even if you don't like sound of a client ya have to do it for ya own safety sometimes I would say I lie about a few things for 1 safety first if you of don't like the sound of a client what is your gutt instinct ??? ??? ??? To lie ::) exactly especially if it's within reason so your not alone there I think we all tell little white lies along the line somewhere or other xx :angel:
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Dont see why anyone would be offended if asked weather they’ve had surgery
I personally would lie if asked as can’t see any benefit in doing so
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I'm going against the grain here too. If your pics are clear about your body size, then you're not being dishonest. You have to find the balance of keeping your decent clients happy and being happy yourself. We all sell an experience based on fantasy. If you're wearing a purple wig, does it really matter if it's real, as long as that's how you're marketing yourself? I don't think so.
Someone not answering questions on surgery isn't taking food out of my mouth. If any client thinks he should know my personal medical details, then I'd prefer not to see him. It's also not my place to judge how other ladies run their business. If it's keeping a roof over their heads (and often their kids), then so be it. You're not getting a moral judgement from me.
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in my opinion it’s no ones business but yours. Let them make their own conclusions, you don’t have to explain yourself, like I say just my opinion