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Author Topic: Stuck in a rut!  (Read 2150 times)

Taylor

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Stuck in a rut!
« on: 04 August 2011, 11:25:46 am »
Hello

I have been escorting for two years, I have decided i want to get out of it... i have been job hunting like mad but i don't even get an interview or call back! before escorting i was pretty successful with jobs! but i have a two year gap on my cv! i just want a job and i don't know what to do! however i am addicted to the good money and finer things of life, so i don't know if i will enjoy working for ?50 per day! i also am self employed do pay the tax man,

i have been with my other half for over a year, his hours were cut at work so he agreed to let me use the spare room to work from to help with rent, since telling him what i do for a living our relationship has never been the same! lack of sex etc.. i really want to belong just to him now! were both stressed as he has been suspended from work and has alot of his mind and i am stressed because i want a normal job and out of escorting....

its so frustrating i cant decide what i really want... if i was single i would probably carry on  escorting till my thirties but i want a decent relationship with my boyfriend and a stimulating job!

What do i do??

Taylor x


♥"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." Marilyn Monroe♥

ladyjennaj

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Re: Stuck in a rut!
« Reply #1 on: 04 August 2011, 11:28:02 am »
I used to worry about the stimulating job situation, and it can be frustrating. I write part-time also, to fill a gap in my CV. I think the job market is terrible at the moment for everyone...

Coty

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Re: Stuck in a rut!
« Reply #2 on: 04 August 2011, 11:44:52 am »
I used to worry about the stimulating job situation, and it can be frustrating. I write part-time also, to fill a gap in my CV. I think the job market is terrible at the moment for everyone...

Yes it is, it's awful.
When I was young I'd get several interviews and get every job and have my pick of the best one....now you are lucky to even hear back, let alone get to the interview stage. My daughter in law just went for a job and there were 2000 apply for it! She managed to get past the application stage, past the phone interview and to an actual interview but was beaten by someone with more experience and she has a degree. The only job I'd get now would be in a supermarket or cleaning toilets on minimum wage. It's just awful:-(


Anyway...I have no advice really, but hope you find a solution.
Good luck.

Coty x

Simone

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Re: Stuck in a rut!
« Reply #3 on: 04 August 2011, 03:27:48 pm »
Have you anyone who could give you a reference to fill in the last 2 years? I know it's a bit sneaky but I'm currently about to start job hunting and that's what I'm doing.  You could still say you were still working on a self employed basis but working at xyz in a temporary position.

Failing that could you say you were caring for a relative? travelling? Apologies if you've already gone down these routes but 2 years is a long gap to have. Just wing it (I think I mean lie :-[) if you have to.  I don't really condone fibbing but in our situation we have to bend the rules sometimes.

Maybye you could try volunteering and then get a reference from then? Basically anything to fill in that gap.

Good luck, I think what you are doing is very brave.

Sweet-Pleasure

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Re: Stuck in a rut!
« Reply #4 on: 04 August 2011, 04:04:19 pm »
Adding to what Simone said, you could say you were working self employed in a totally unrelated position to the one you're applying for, maybe massage, cooking or photography? Something your boss is unlikely to ask you to demonstrate lol!

If you don't have much experience or qualifications for a job you would find stimulating I can highly recommend getting in touch with a few employment agencies who can give you temp work. That's what I did a few years ago and wound up with a nice job for the NHS.

Hope that helps!

XxX

Your Tera

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Re: Stuck in a rut!
« Reply #5 on: 05 August 2011, 12:02:39 am »
I have a friend who has a lot of education and almost no work experience. She is American and doing a masters, here. I advised her bluntly that even I (in my other life) wouldn't even interview her on paper, but that working with her for five minutes proves she is invaluable.
There are a ton of temporary agencies as well as placement agencies. A lot of my media friends have gotten some great experience and leads doing temporary projects. Some of them can even last a maternity leave!! And, it's not all that different from what we do. Some planning ahead, but some early morning calls. You basically have to suck it up and set your pride aside, and inevitably you wind up at some lovely places with cool people.
If you can type, speak in complete sentences and prove you are a sentient being, there are definitely long-term benefits to temping, first.
xx

Taylor

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Re: Stuck in a rut!
« Reply #6 on: 05 August 2011, 07:37:02 pm »
thanks for your advice ladies,

but i have already tried job agency's and they don't have work!! it sucks!!!

coty i used to go for job interviews all the time and get the job but no one wants me now :(

i have put on my CV that i have been travelling and managing my own ebay shop!

just want a little part time office job or retail work!

i have even applied for cleaning jobs but you need to be experienced that is so lame!
♥"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." Marilyn Monroe♥

EmilyJones

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Re: Stuck in a rut!
« Reply #7 on: 06 August 2011, 04:25:52 am »
Taylor, I know this may not sound very helpful, particuarly when you're properly knackered (physically AND emotionally) from the process of applying for jobs and going to interviews and then not hearing back - but I do think you are going to find something great one day soon!

It's also my experience that jobs were easier to get a few years ago, even though then I was a fairly useless teenager, than now - post-uni, I even went to a Starbucks interview with about 100 other applicants, including middle-aged men with briefcases! I did get the job (and enjoyed it, except for the "can barely survive on min. wage in London even living in a crappy flat with 5 housemates!" thing) but the whole thing was a huge process and it frightens me now I want to move into a new career soon - how can I compete against 100+ other applicants every time?!

But one thing I do know is that if you keep trying, something WILL come up. It's much more of a numbers game these days - if there's a low chance of getting a job, you just have to do that many more interviews til your chance comes. It's really exhausting :( but it will be so worth it cos once you've got something, you can start to relax while keeping an eye open for possibly better opportunities - a much nicer position to be in!

Have you tried looking up organisations that are set up to help people get back into employment, no matter the reason for them being out of the traditional job market? I know certain specific ones exist to help certain groups of people (Jobs In Mind comes to mind!) but there must be more general ones - perhaps linked to your local job centre? And I know those are some dire words to hear sometimes when you're used to being a very productive, hard-working member of society and have never wanted to sign on in your life! But there may be some other use you can find from the place. And if nothing else, a bit of support through a major challenge in your life can always be welcome. :)
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Taylor

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Re: Stuck in a rut!
« Reply #8 on: 06 August 2011, 09:28:48 am »
Thanks for your advice Emily i really appreciate it! I just need to be patience!  :D
♥"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." Marilyn Monroe♥

lailah terri

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Re: Stuck in a rut!
« Reply #9 on: 06 August 2011, 02:17:28 pm »
Good luck OP, things are really tough jobwise at the mo, its so competitive in london and thats just for the basic entry level jobs. I have a degree but i found that it really didnt make a difference, someone with more experience is usually more desired. I would suggest the same thing as someone else and do a sneaky!!! get some friends to write your references. in the meantime if you can afford it, do some voluntary work, or an internship in the sector you want to work in, its a great way in :)

x
"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."
? Marilyn Monroe