SAAFE forum
General Category => Questions and Answers => Topic started by: PinkDolphin on 28 March 2013, 09:49:20 am
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Oh dear, I am the unluckiest escort in the world. I've only recently just start escorting. It was going well, except in the last few days I started to get tingles all over. Like little electrical shocks. Every once in a while. and my privates bum have started itching. I haven't had an outbreak, but I did get a swab and that unspecified non-gonorrhea thing showed up, which I have discovered is a sign of herpes. I've also felt dizzy lately. I've learned that lack of serious outbreak is probably because this is the initial infection.
I thought this was the right 'field' to be in. I can get over having herpes, it's just I was just starting to 'get things together' after starting escorting, and after a mere few WEEKS I catch something.
Now, I did read that some escorts continue to work when they don't have an outbreak. But still, there's a chance that clients will catch something, and if that happens I would be in trouble. And I don't like the idea of screwing people over by not telling them.
So is it over for me? I've been depressed for the last few days over this (as I said, more this than actually having herpes)
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Ouch. Given how early this was detected, you should have been offered an antiviral, probably Aciclovir, to use for five days. Outbreaks should decrease in frequency over time, and again, using an antiviral as soon as you feel any tingling usually reduces severity.
It is a tough one. On the one hand, most people have at least one strain of HSV already, usually HSV-1*, including anyone who's ever had a cold sore on their mouth, and you can't give someone it if they already have it. When testing for HSV-2 became available about twenty years ago, about one in eight female blood donors - i.e. people who'd been screened for behaviour considered risky, including being a sex worker or having a bisexual male partner - and one in four women attending a sexual health clinic had HSV-2. Not everyone knew it, because it often doesn't have any symptoms.
On the other hand, you do know...
Is saying something like 'like most people, I have had..' on your site / profile an option?
* I've had HSV-1 since I was a child.
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Hi PinkDolphin
Sorry you're feeling down and unwell. I contracted herpes from my husband (cold sore/oral sex) about 14 years ago and was very ill that first time. If you definitely have herpes then you should be taking medication, which will help considerably.
I have been an escort for 7 years and have been lucky to only suffer two outbreaks during that time. I don't work during that time obviously, due to not wishing to infect anyone but also because there's no way that anyone could touch me down there!
I have found that the outbreaks come when I'm stressed/run down etc so try to be positive and keep yourself and immune system as healthy and strong as possible. As far as I know the chances of anyone contracting herpes from you when you don't have an outbreak is extremely slim so get yourself well and get back to work!
Eve x
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Sorry to hear you've contracted herpes so early on in your career. Someone put a link on here a while ago about herpes http://www.herpes.org.uk/. Have a read through as you might find it useful. I hope you get sorted and are back working again soon. xx
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Well nobody here can tell you what to do, but to be honest, if you've only just started I would be taking down the ads and thinking of my Plan B, at least until I knew how this was going to affect my body.
You may well never have another attack, but there are plenty of ways to make money even in the sex industry without putting others at risk and whilst I've never had to make a decision like this (and I've never even had a cold sore, although I have had the chickenpox), I would be restricting services until I'd had time to monitor what was going on. Could you do massage/HR, or even webcamming for a time instead? You can always rethink things once you've determined (like Eve) whether there's likely to be any regular/significant effects, but do bear in mind that you can still infect people even when you're not having an outbreak and I think you need to discuss this in depth with your GUM. I know a number of ladies who work (and offer OWO) despite having cold sores and just take time off if they've got one, but I must admit I don't think I could (but then I don't do OWO anyway).
Bear in mind that somebody had to give you this in the first place so don't feel bad - we're all exposed to a variety of bugs every time we come into contact with other people, and I daresay there will be very few among us who haven't had sex with with someone carrying HSV-2 and whom (as Ian says) may well not even know they've got it; I've been a prostitute on and off for ten years, and the chances are that I've seen at least a handful of punters with HIV, Hepatitis and Lord knows what else without any of them ever mentioning it. And I don't exist in a vacuum.
Would Ian's idea be an option? I don't see the problem in working provided you're upfront (and the people who are too stupid to understand the difference between carrying a dormant virus and having an actual outbreak are unlikely to be much of a loss).
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Sorry to hear you've contracted herpes so early on in your career. Someone put a link on here a while ago about herpes http://www.herpes.org.uk/. Have a read through as you might find it useful. I hope you get sorted and are back working again soon. xx
Yes that was me :) This is one of the few non judgemental and informative sites about herpes. There is also a helpline number on the site that you can ring.
I too recommend taking a bit of time out, to rest up, and consider what you want to do. I'm all for being honest generally but I think if you admit to having herpes on escort sites, you might as well kiss your escorting career goodbye. Even people who are normally decent and non-judgemental tend to run a mile when an STI is mentioned. Thats just the way of the world.
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Gosh I do feel sorry for you. DId you actually get diagnosed with Herpes? or are they just saying your results look like it could be?
If it is then it is up to you if you work or not but like Amy has already told you, you can still infect sexual partners even when not on an outbreak as you shed the virus through skin and your mouth anyway. It is less likely to happen through shedding than it is through an outbreak but the risk is still there and one you have to think of as even condoms dont protect your sex partner.
It is the one thing about this job that does worry me, that no matter what precautions I take, if a client is shedding the virus there is a chance I will get it
Most of all take some time to find out how it will affect you. You might not get an outbreak or you might suffer from loads of them and not only do you get sores but it can make you feel very unwell too.
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Well having had a rummage online as I'm stuck at home with a lousy cold, it seems that pretty much any of us could have it unless we've been tested and told we haven't since the last time we had sex - I'd always thought that everybody who caught genital herpes had a really nasty attack straight away, but it seems this isn't the case and it can hang about for ages before making it's first move when you get a bit run down or poorly (which means I pretty much definitely haven't got it, or it would have shown itself in the last couple of days). So the OP may have just caught it, or picked it up months or even years ago, which in itself is scary stuff.
I do believe that the stigma attached to what amounts to a cold sore because of where it occurs is ridiculously unfair, but the issue for me in this particular context isn't really one of health but of discretion - there are plenty of very contagious illnesses we can all catch, but whilst I could have caught my cold (or the chicken pox, meningitis even) from somebody on the train or in the paper shop, anybody suddenly showing signs of genital herpes without any previous can only really have been doing one thing, which is why I don't think I could continue doing full service unless I'd taken at least a year out to see how things were going to progress. The thing about whoring is, you can always drop it and come back - it's not like you're going to miss much.
I agree with Dani that it's scary although I'm not sure it's more so than hepatitis (which is my horror-disease :)) but I'm inclined to think that some natural immunity must get built up or else we'd surely all have it? Slightly off topic, but does anybody know any products that might be helpful in fending off this sort of thing - it may or may not be helpful for the OP, but I wouldn't mind knowing if there are any natural anti-viral supplements worth thinking about? Echinacea was one I remember, but I think that might mainly be for colds.
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Well having had a rummage online as I'm stuck at home with a lousy cold, it seems that pretty much any of us could have it unless we've been tested and told we haven't since the last time we had sex - I'd always thought that everybody who caught genital herpes had a really nasty attack straight away, but it seems this isn't the case and it can hang about for ages before making it's first move when you get a bit run down or poorly (which means I pretty much definitely haven't got it, or it would have shown itself in the last couple of days). So the OP may have just caught it, or picked it up months or even years ago, which in itself is scary stuff.
I do believe that the stigma attached to what amounts to a cold sore because of where it occurs is ridiculously unfair, but the issue for me in this particular context isn't really one of health but of discretion - there are plenty of very contagious illnesses we can all catch, but whilst I could have caught my cold (or the chicken pox, meningitis even) from somebody on the train or in the paper shop, anybody suddenly showing signs of genital herpes without any previous can only really have been doing one thing, which is why I don't think I could continue doing full service unless I'd taken at least a year out to see how things were going to progress. The thing about whoring is, you can always drop it and come back - it's not like you're going to miss much.
I agree with Dani that it's scary although I'm not sure it's more so than hepatitis (which is my horror-disease :)) but I'm inclined to think that some natural immunity must get built up or else we'd surely all have it? Slightly off topic, but does anybody know any products that might be helpful in fending off this sort of thing - it may or may not be helpful for the OP, but I wouldn't mind knowing if there are any natural anti-viral supplements worth thinking about? Echinacea was one I remember, but I think that might mainly be for colds.
A nurse told me 7 or 8 out of 10(or even higher, it's virtually everyone) adults have been exposed to either or both viruses, and if you don't have symptoms you have almost definitely built up immunity.
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Normally, I don't do 'big pharm = evil', but in this case until some drug company came up with one of the first antivirals, no-one cared about genital herpes - it was just a cold sore on the genitals rather than your mouth / elsewhere on your face. It was their marketing department which created the herpes scare of the late 1970s which made it the sexual infection bogeyman until the arrival of HIV/Aids in the early 1980s. (See also the rash of stories about HPV and assorted conditions as soon as vaccines against strains of HPV were approved, another clear example of trying to shift more product via fear.)
The likelihood of infection is strongly linked to the number of partners, and given that condom use is not complete protection, I think most people here do have at least one strain. Ditto many clients.
I don't think any 'natural' supplement has any proper evidence that it works for this, but that doesn't mean something doesn't.
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I think that whiling away an evening scaring yourself witless reading sites about STIs when you're not well and have had too much lemsip is probably not too helpful either ;D.
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I think that whiling away an evening scaring yourself witless reading sites about STIs when you're not well and have had too much lemsip is probably not too helpful either ;D.
Indeed and there are plenty of sites seemingly devoted to scaring us and telling anyone who may have caught herpes that their life is over. This when what people need are cold hard facts......and help/support too.
No one is fussed that many of us have been exposed to the chicken pox or shingles virus (same viral family) and that it is living harmlessly in our bodies. The fact is that most of the population will catch Type 1 or Type 2 sooner or later but most of us will never know that we have it Why? Because:
1 in 5 will have no symptoms;
3 in 5 will have mild symptoms so are unlikely to be diagnosed;
1 in 5 will have obvious symptoms and will be diagnosed.
www.herpes.org.uk
So since 80% of those with herpes don't know it this means that its probable that the type of judgemental person who pontificates about STIs is most likely is carrying the virus themselves ;D
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I appreciate every post so far. I guess it's true that technically my escorting career isn't completely over (my initial plans for escorting are, though. IF my outbreaks turn out to be mild and infrequent I'll do it part-time) I just have to see how it affects me. I don't know yet if it's HSV-1 or HSV-2.
I haven't been officially diagnosed, no. And I agree, you can possibly convince yourself that you have every disease under the sun by googling your symptoms. But these facts:
1. I have had more sexual contact in the last few weeks than I have had all my life
2. The bodily shocks/tingles everywhere (and slight tingle while urinating)
3. Discharge
4. That I have just been diagnosed with an NGU
seems to lead to nothing else but herpes, even with google. It's possibly too early to get tested.
After I posted this thread yesterday, I saw a small red thing on my privates and touched it. It didn't even look like a bump -- just a spot. A rust-coloured liquid came out, and I was sore afterwards, but a really mild sore. I was convinced that the blister outbreak was starting (progressing on to the painful nightmare stage of herpes), but nothing has happened ever since. And I'm still getting electric shocks, which should be gone at this point.
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After I posted this thread yesterday, I saw a small red thing on my privates and touched it. It didn't even look like a bump -- just a spot. A rust-coloured liquid came out, and I was sore afterwards, but a really mild sore. I was convinced that the blister outbreak was starting (progressing on to the painful nightmare stage of herpes), but nothing has happened ever since. And I'm still getting electric shocks, which should be gone at this point.
The advice I would give to anyone with these symptoms is please stop trying to diagnose yourself - go back to your GUM clinic and ask for a Herpes swab on the blistered area. If it is Herpes the earlier you start treatment with anti virals the better.
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The spot has appeared again. Just when the GUM clinic is closed. I have to wait till possibly Tuesday now.
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The spot has appeared again. Just when the GUM clinic is closed. I have to wait till possibly Tuesday now.
You can always go to your doctors you know. They will do a swab as well. My doctor does most of my tests. Just dont say you think it is Herpes as most doctors will tell you to go to the GUM clinic just say you have had a blister come up and are worried.
I am lucky because I also get free blood tests for herpes as my body cannot cope with any virus very well and up until now I have not contracted either type (fingers crossed as I dont want to tempt fate). I guess I have just been very lucky.
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I'll go to my GP. I'm slightly embarrassed about visiting him, because I get along tremendously with my GP and have approached him with relatively 'lighter' matters so far, and so suddenly appearing with the news that 'I have dots on my genitals (which may indicate my having an illness tied to a stigma') is a new thing. But I'll get over that for my health, I guess.
Again, many thanks for the advice. It's funny how 'prostitute' or 'escort' has certain extreme implications in society, and yet I can rely on this forum to give me balanced information and advice.
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Hi ive often revered the uses of virgin coconut oil on a few posts.. its one of the best oils around especially as an anti viral.. a few cases on www.coconuthealth.com shows how it effectively reduces the viral load on any disease viral/bacterial . Trials in America are ongoing to use it to trat aids and up to date its working... it works by attacking the lipid coating of the virus and killing it from the inside.. not professing to be an expert or doc but I eat it all the time, im very rarely poorly or if im unlucky enough to catch a virus its over with pretty quickly... Have a read and make up you own mind on it
Hope you are well soon xxxx
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Hi ive often revered the uses of virgin coconut oil on a few posts.. its one of the best oils around especially as an anti viral.. a few cases on www.coconuthealth.com shows how it effectively reduces the viral load on any disease viral/bacterial . Trials in America are ongoing to use it to trat aids and up to date its working... it works by attacking the lipid coating of the virus and killing it from the inside.. not professing to be an expert or doc but I eat it all the time, im very rarely poorly or if im unlucky enough to catch a virus its over with pretty quickly... Have a read and make up you own mind on it
Hope you are well soon xxxx
Whilst I'm sure you obviously find benefits from it, coconut oil is turning up all the time as the latest 'cure all'. It's the latest 'fashionable' thing just as cranberry juice, aloe vera, extra virgin olive oil, acai berries and now raspberry ketones are. It can be easy to end up with a cupboard full of these things.
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Hi ive often revered the uses of virgin coconut oil on a few posts.. its one of the best oils around especially as an anti viral.. a few cases on www.coconuthealth.com shows how it effectively reduces the viral load on any disease viral/bacterial . Trials in America are ongoing to use it to trat aids and up to date its working... it works by attacking the lipid coating of the virus and killing it from the inside.. not professing to be an expert or doc but I eat it all the time, im very rarely poorly or if im unlucky enough to catch a virus its over with pretty quickly... Have a read and make up you own mind on it
Hope you are well soon xxxx
Whilst I'm sure you obviously find benefits from it, coconut oil is turning up all the time as the latest 'cure all'. It's the latest 'fashionable' thing just as cranberry juice, aloe vera, extra virgin olive oil, acai berries and now raspberry ketones are. It can be easy to end up with a cupboard full of these things.
I use organic coconut oil for several things even cooking. It can even be used for oil pulling too.
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Hi ive often revered the uses of virgin coconut oil on a few posts.. its one of the best oils around especially as an anti viral.. a few cases on www.coconuthealth.com shows how it effectively reduces the viral load on any disease viral/bacterial . Trials in America are ongoing to use it to trat aids and up to date its working... it works by attacking the lipid coating of the virus and killing it from the inside.. not professing to be an expert or doc but I eat it all the time, im very rarely poorly or if im unlucky enough to catch a virus its over with pretty quickly... Have a read and make up you own mind on it
Hope you are well soon xxxx
Whilst I'm sure you obviously find benefits from it, coconut oil is turning up all the time as the latest 'cure all'. It's the latest 'fashionable' thing just as cranberry juice, aloe vera, extra virgin olive oil, acai berries and now raspberry ketones are. It can be easy to end up with a cupboard full of these things.
I use organic coconut oil for several things even cooking. It can even be used for oil pulling too.
I just eat it straight off the spoon and use topically on spots and sores.. disappears over night x
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Back on topic, please.
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I'll go to my GP. I'm slightly embarrassed about visiting him, because I get along tremendously with my GP and have approached him with relatively 'lighter' matters so far, and so suddenly appearing with the news that 'I have dots on my genitals (which may indicate my having an illness tied to a stigma') is a new thing. But I'll get over that for my health, I guess.
Again, many thanks for the advice. It's funny how 'prostitute' or 'escort' has certain extreme implications in society, and yet I can rely on this forum to give me balanced information and advice.
Try not to be embarrassed as they will have dealt with some thing like this before. It will clear up with antibiotics or cream. You will be back in working form before you know it. Take this time to relax before the stresses of working again. That is what I would do. Concentrate on looking after yourself first. :)
If you fancy to talk you can pm me any time.