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Author Topic: Small claims court?  (Read 2669 times)

Mimil

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Re: Small claims court?
« Reply #30 on: 23 February 2020, 12:33:18 am »
Quote from: trashbaby on 22 February 2020, 11:40:43 am
Honestly pretty shocked at the responses berating the OP for spending this money.  How many of us are in a financial situation in which we can just tuck three grand away and leave it there, in the name of Good Business?  It's WILD to me.  So many of us, in fact, most of us I would say, start doing sex work because we are in a place of financial precarity and for MANY of us that financial precarity DOESNT GO AWAY.  The OP is clearly a person who struggles with mental health which can affect her ability to work, and I would hazard a guess that she probably isn't in a a position to follow all of these rules.  Of course in a perfect world we could all do this, and I'm glad that so many of you seem to live in that perfect world, but it's not like that for everyone.  To everyone who wants to berate her for spending the £3k, if you were in a situation where it was 'spend a prepaypent or be hungry/fail to make rent and become homeless' what would you choose? Jesus christ.   And honestly, 'what if he wants to book someone else with that money'? Really? His potential penis emergency is suddenly more important than one of our own, who is clearly having a tough time right now?  She said shes going to pay him back.  There is NO need for this.  A bit of solidarity wouldn't go amiss.

OP, I'm sorry you're dealing with this.  The clients are generally in a position of power in this industry, what with having the financial upper hand, and us relying on them booking in order to pay the bills.  I understand his annoyance about this but you're not trying to run away with the money you are offering to pay him back in instalments. A court won't touch this AFAIK and if they did all they'd do is take instalments from you also - nobody can take money from you that you don't have.  Sex contracts aren't enforcable in court and if he lied and said it was a loan, depending on your circumstances you could tell them the truth that it was a sex contract. He would need to show proof anyway and if all he has are texts to a potential sugar baby they'll tell him to fuck off.

I would suggest writing him an email making him an offer, clearly laid out of how much you'll pay him and when, and when the debt will be cleared.  Tell him that you have absolutely no intention of running away with his money and that you are deeply sorry for how this has turned out, but that you can't give him money you don't have.  Echoing the other suggestion of perhaps seeing if you can get a loan or a credit card to pay him off and then you'll just have to deal with the company instead of him.

Good luck and take good care of yourself. xxx


This! Some of the commenters are coming across as male identified honestly. So desperate to say “ If it was the other way round” he is in the position of power so it can never be the same. But poor men *insert eye roll*.  Also, she is trying and has acknowledged her mistake. He agreed to take it in instalments so I really think he’s more to blame at this point. This isn’t a regular job though so you can not compare it to one. Yes, we pay taxes (most of us here) but “selling” your body is not and will never be the same as providing any other service.

Anyway, please do not beat yourself up too much OP. You made a mistake and he’s trash. Try your best to make the situation right, you’re doing more than most by not running away when there’s nothing to stop you. 

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English Green

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Re: Small claims court?
« Reply #31 on: 23 February 2020, 12:50:24 am »
Quote from: Kay on 22 February 2020, 02:24:18 pm
Horses for courses - I would never have accepted 3K unless I knew I had earned it.

I would never have accepted the whole of the 3k either if i know i am not good with money and a chance i will spend it.
There is a lot of people out there not just sex workers all walks of life that would find it hard not to dip into it that is why best not to be tempted in first place.

The problem she has is him knowing where she lives so she cannot run off anyway. I think if he cannot or will not accept installments then not much she can do. If he continues to make threats she might need to call the local police explain.the situation that she made a bad call but trying to put it right and he will not except that and is making her scared. Police will say he has a right to ask for money back but not make threats or scare you. They could tell him he needs to go small claims and let a judge decide if she needs to pay anything back depending what proof there is of what the money was for.

She said he is wealthy so he could afford to accept installments but sounds like it is more about anger with him now.

So it might honestly be best to call your local police station for some honest advice about the methods he is using to try and get it all back in one go.
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Ukdarling

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Re: Small claims court?
« Reply #32 on: 23 February 2020, 07:54:50 am »
I do not believe that the money here is the issue, you have made an attempt to repay in some manner, it is the behaviour of your client that is in question. Contact the police, you should not be feeling unsafe because of his communication and as such this should be addressed.
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SWgirl

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Re: Small claims court?
« Reply #33 on: 23 February 2020, 02:04:06 pm »
Quote from: Ukdarling on 23 February 2020, 07:54:50 am
I do not believe that the money here is the issue, you have made an attempt to repay in some manner, it is the behaviour of your client that is in question. Contact the police, you should not be feeling unsafe because of his communication and as such this should be addressed.

I agree. He is crossing boundaries here and it will develop and turn nasty. He’s resenting the fact he handed over that amount of money, basically thinking of his dick.

I tell you one thing he won’t go to court about it, it would damage his ego as you have proof of the working relationship between the 2 of you. All scare tactics. Please do not feed into this and get help via support groups like NUM. They can contact a local SW friendly police officer for you to talk to. Getting them involved will shake him up and get him to stop throwing his toys out of the pram.

Which begs the question, who’s the daddy here?  ;)
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ana30

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Re: Small claims court?
« Reply #34 on: 23 February 2020, 04:38:02 pm »
Quote from: SWgirl on 23 February 2020, 02:04:06 pm
I tell you one thing he won’t go to court about it, it would damage his ego as you have proof of the working relationship between the 2 of you. All scare tactics. Please do not feed into this and get help via support groups like NUM. They can contact a local SW friendly police officer for you to talk to. Getting them involved will shake him up and get him to stop throwing his toys out of the pram.

Which begs the question, who’s the daddy here?  ;)

THIS. He would never in a million years think you're brave enough to go to the police, he believes you're some little chicken he can mess with. Once he realizes the police is involved he's going to PANIC, OMG his reputation in tatters! Proof him wrong because the ball is in your court OP.
« Last Edit: 23 February 2020, 04:41:48 pm by Ana30 »
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"Sex work is real work, being a landlord isn't" - Graffitti seen on a wall.

peaches_xx

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Re: Small claims court?
« Reply #35 on: 28 February 2020, 11:41:42 pm »
I am pretty sure that you need to have the debtor's full real name and address in order to take them to court. Plus as others said sex contracts are not enforceable in court. Just block him and ignore/disappear I say. You did try to repay him in installments so you did nothing wrong.
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