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Author Topic: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?  (Read 3279 times)

chantelheywood

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Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« on: 09 November 2011, 12:46:32 pm »
Hi, I'm new to escorting and want to get started. The local agency I've saw online is full of 'tasteful' pictures of really skinny, attractive girls and says that girls 'will meet all of your requirements', which I don't want as I'm only willing to provide 'extra services' with who I want to. I  want to start out as a companion basically, like a hired girlfriend and don't really want to be 'providing' to the undesirable types.

I'm 18 and I'm not bad looking but I'm hardly the supermodel type.

And ideas how I can get started?

Thanks  :)

xw5

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #1 on: 09 November 2011, 01:09:25 pm »
If you're not willing to be sexual with anyone who's clean and respectful, you need to reconsider escorting - the market for non-sexual escorting is minuscule.

Have you read the main http://saafe.info site?

As an independent, you would have more control over who you see, but see the first sentence. The more restrictions you put on who you're willing to see, the more you'll risk putting off even those who would pass the test.



'The Ian formerly known as SW5'. What they said: "Indispensable", "You are our best resource", and (hours later!) "I'm afraid that you're being made redundant..."

Winding down YourEscortSite.com

MissThang

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #2 on: 09 November 2011, 01:13:34 pm »
I'm hardly the supermodel type.

Neither are they, 99% of the time! A lot of the agency pics get mega airbrushed. ATM, I use fairly honest, non-professional pictures, mostly because I can't contemplate seeing the crushing look of disappointment when fantasy meets reality!

This is just what I've gleaned, so if anyone comes along and contradicts me, believe them instead! I'm one of the least experienced girls on here
I've not been working long myself, and there'll be plenty of far more helpful girls (and guys) along soon, but personally I think you're being a bit optimistic with your 'services provided'.
Escort agency work often gets portrayed as accompanying men out to dinner and social occasions. If you find the client gorgeous, and they're all gorgeous, you may agree to a night of hot passion which he will pay you handsomely for.
I may be wrong, but I don't think anyone in the history of the world ever has hired an escort for anything but sex. You don't get to pick and choose the clients, you get what you're given. They are all mostly middle-aged and fat. You can choose whether you get to offer things like anal sex, and if you will want them to wear a condom during oral sex, but refusing to fuck them is not an option. You wouldn't be a hired girlfriend, you would be a prostitute, like most of us.
Are you sure this is something you want to do?

chantelheywood

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #3 on: 09 November 2011, 01:14:49 pm »
Yes,  I read the main SAAFE site with the FAQ.

You see I wouldn't mind going more personal, but if I put in a newspaper ad, I could get anybody and they're quite expensive.

I also have boundaries, I wouldn't offer things like 'a levels' or oral without condom or that. I also wouldn't go kinky or whatever.

I've had a look on platinum select and I  certainly wouldn't be giving any extra for 50 quid x

chantelheywood

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #4 on: 09 November 2011, 01:19:46 pm »
I'm not too bothered about having sex, but if they were too undesirable, I would feel sick, tbh. Is there any place where I could choose the men. I.e. a man replies to my ad who has a picture and some more info. Because if I do a newspaper ad, anyone could be calling up and that at the least seems unsafe.

Just to note, I wouldn't mind the middle age bit, but everybody has limits right? x

Ellie_e

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #5 on: 09 November 2011, 01:55:10 pm »

I'm not too bothered about having sex, but if they were too undesirable, I would feel sick, tbh. Is there any place where I could choose the men. I.e. a man replies to my ad who has a picture and some more info.

uuuuummm....no.

To be a good escort, you have to be able to fuck people you find undesirable, with enthusiasm.  And you also need to make them think that they are desirable and that you're pretty into it....so being 'not too bothered' isn't really going to cut it.  However, it's totally fine not to offer anal, OWO, role-play, CIF, fetishes, or BDSM
You cannot work for an agency and refuse the client just because he's fat or something and you don't like the look of him.

Agency work I find is *more* the kind of guys who just want sex than indie work.  If a guy is seeing an indie girl he is usually a bit more interested in her as a person.  Agency girls, to a guy, are a bit more disposable and can be ordered like a pizza.  At the moment I'm in Dubai working both independently and through one of these 'high class' agency that make out it's all dinners and drinks and dates and all that bollocks...and every booking is 1hr, and pretty much 1hr of sex.

Most girls advertise on the internet, not newspapers

ParisB

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #6 on: 09 November 2011, 03:30:02 pm »
 honesltly think that you need to have a long good think about doing this  you are young and you do not want to get caught up in the situation of getting the money but hating the job   Your 18  years of age there would have been know way i could have done it at 18
  First off  if you have been watching billie piper in bell da jour  and you are thinking of doing outcalls  then its  nothing like that at all swanning in and out of  5 star hotels  like Claridges and the The Mayfair   f.... more like travel lodge and premire inn,   if you get a outcall to a Novatell or a Marriot then your doing ok cos they supply you with soap and the beds are decent           

  you have already said that you dont want to do this  and that ect which is fine but  in order to earn money you have to f.... a cock ,  suck a cock   and smile and be nice and  there is no money in being a social companion  anyone who tell you otherwise is bullshitting you 
there are plenty of girls that do a lot of stuff  ( not unsafe ) but a lot so you will be competing with them

While i dissagree with the comment that most of the men or fat and old,   you have to be able  to put aside your predujdices with this work with regard to age weight and physical appearance

you cant pick  the clients  not if your advertising on the newspapers or internet  they call  they turn up they pay you you dont open the door to them and say f.....  your ugly i cant shag that   
they wont send you a photo  ( why would they ) they want to f... you not marry you   

Could you have sex with let me see  Roy from Coronation st  or   Les Batersby  ( sorrry but im a corrie fan )
could you have sex with  Ken Barlow from corrie ( come on ladies help me out here im trying to think of ordinary guys in the limelight)    or what about   Amon Holmes the tv presenter  or Terry Wogan ( is he still alive )
What about  what his name from the Royal family  the one who sits and watches the tv all day long and used to be in brookside ,    what about  the guy from shamless with long hair  is it frank or micky not sure     
 
    Go to your local high st or shopping center and basically hand on heart could you f... every guy that you see there  fat old young bald fit black white asian disabled  if you can then you will probably be fine with this type of work       

    however if you really want to do this  i would suggest that you go and work in a local massage parlour for a few shifts  you will be safe  you will f.... all different types of guys and it will take the rose coloured glasss off you very very quickly   then you can decide if its what you want to do 
 

xw5

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #7 on: 09 November 2011, 03:40:48 pm »
Hooray for reading the site, but if you want be visually choosy, you want a dating site and talk about looking for someone 'generous' or you hustle in bars (if you get caught, they'll very probably chuck you out and you can end up barred from all the local places) and only respond / approach the ones you'd be ok with. And then, more times than not, get rejected when you mention that, oh, your time isn't free.

However, it's totally fine not to offer anal, OWO, role-play, CIF, fetishes, or BDSM
..
Most girls advertise on the internet, not newspapers

Yep - no-one's going to raise an eyebrow at limiting services to things that you're comfortable with offering.

Yep - it's cheaper (AW is not the only free directory, your own site can be under ?1/week etc) and you get to say more about yourself as well as starting the screening process: if you say 'do this to get a booking' on your site and they don't... they don't get the booking. Again, asking them to send a photo is not going to get much (polite) response.

I've had a look on platinum select and I  certainly wouldn't be giving any extra for 50 quid x

We class them as a scam site - they've been known to put up false details for real escorts as well as selling the straight male / non-sexual escort dream.
'The Ian formerly known as SW5'. What they said: "Indispensable", "You are our best resource", and (hours later!) "I'm afraid that you're being made redundant..."

Winding down YourEscortSite.com

tessab

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #8 on: 09 November 2011, 03:59:55 pm »

Could you have sex with let me see  Roy from Coronation st  or   Les Batersby  ( sorrry but im a corrie fan )
could you have sex with  Ken Barlow from corrie ( come on ladies help me out here im trying to think of ordinary guys in the limelight)    or what about   Amon Holmes the tv presenter  or Terry Wogan ( is he still alive )
What about  what his name from the Royal family  the one who sits and watches the tv all day long and used to be in brookside ,    what about  the guy from shamless with long hair  is it frank or micky not sure     
 
    Go to your local high st or shopping center and basically hand on heart could you f... every guy that you see there  fat old young bald fit black white asian disabled  if you can then you will probably be fine with this type of work        


This is a good list but it's missing Ian Beale from Eastenders.

ParisB

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #9 on: 09 November 2011, 04:22:54 pm »
This is a good list but it's missing Ian Beale from Eastenders.

 lol i forgot ian beal  i never watch eastender  -    what about Reg Hollis from the Bill    

(Quote fixed - xw5)
« Last Edit: 11 November 2011, 09:46:42 am by xw5 »

MissThang

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #10 on: 09 November 2011, 08:31:47 pm »
Hahahaha eww Ian Beale! What about Jim Royle?

Paris -that's exactly how I prepared for my first job! I went round Asda doing my shopping, an looked at every single man that I saw and thought "Could I shag him?" The answer that came back each and every time was "Yes, if they had the money" so I knew I'd be OK!

It's true that they're not all fat and middle-aged, but personally I think it's important to have a picture of 'typical client' (if there could ever be such a thing!) as someone you wouldn't find remotely attractive. If they are better than average, then it's a bonus.

Also, maybe I'm being a soft-arse here, but do you think you could actually say to someone's face, "No, I'm not going to go ahead with this booking as you are too unattractive." It's one thing turning them down for bizarre behaviour or poor hygiene - that's deserved. But because you don't find them physically attractive - that's  really going to hurt their feelings, when they've done nothing wrong.

I agree with ALL the advice above. (See, I told you there's people who know what they're talking about as well as me here  ;D)

I have to say, my gut instinct is that prostitution isn't for you. Obviously, that's only based on what you've shown on this thread, so only you know the real answer to that.

RR

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #11 on: 10 November 2011, 04:07:27 pm »
Chantel, go on adultwork if you want a free listing - at the very minimum you can pay 1 credit (?1 or so) a day to display your phone number.

Don't take this the wrong way, but by saying things like "if they were too undesirable" and expressing a desire to see a photo of the client, you're opening yourself up massively to all the timewasters and trolls (and AW has them in abundance! They do lurk and wait for new girls then bombard you with a load of emails). I don't think a paper ad is really a good way to go if you're new - it can be very mundane, very repetitive and its been my only real experiences of look and go (some twat wanted me to "do a twirl" - why don't YOU twirl on my 8" strap on, asshole). Saying that though a lot of my bookings from the paper were actually alright blokes, even if they were more of the Ian Beale type variety looks wise.

A lot of men just want company true, but company that convincingly likes having his willy in their mouth. You don't have to see all ages or ethnic backgrounds either - ultimately it is your body and therefore your choice as to who you see. I personally would feel nauseated seeing someone older than my dad (who is 55) - I look far younger than 28 as well and to me I find the idea of a guy who is more than twice my age wanting to have sex with me kind of... disturbing. Saying that though, some men age well, some men take care of themselves as they hit 40+. But how will you handle a guy who has erectile dysfunction because he's getting on a bit, even if he looks alright? How will you handle having to have sex with someone who is seriously, clinically obese (beyond cowgirl, fnarrrrr)? You do have the right to refuse service but your average client is not going to be a good looking guy. The older women here will probably contradict me, but in my experience men in their twenties largely do not pay for sex with women in their twenties. They most likely have MILF/Mrs Robinson type desires and go for that market. Not to sound horrible, but at 18 you're more likely to get older men. MUCH older men.

When I first started in the industry I was seriously misled as to the type of client I would get and was quite stringent in many ways as to what I would do, when I worked and who I saw. With regards to the 'older men' comment, nowadays if you offered me the choice between a 27 year old client or a 47 year old client, I'd hands down pick the latter. But I know that he's more likely to be a) married, so understands the female psyche a bit better and thus treats you with more respect, b) more sexually experienced, which means the sex isn't actually that bad c) professional, which means he understands its a business transaction and doesn't take the piss as much. But when I first started I would have went "fucking a 47 year old? Ew!" If I could exclusively see men in their 40s I would. I have a low bullshit tolerance and in my general experience, they get that more.

If you have something that makes you stand out, it helps to emphasise it. I ain't no supermodel lol I'm a 12-14 and covered in tattoos, hugely sarcastic and an out and out tomboy but I always did okay for me and mine. I always attracted the businessman type because of the way I come across in my profile, but I do get a lot of music and art industry types because of my inkings too. Trust me, its not glamourous and they don't look stunning nor are hung like stud horses!!! Ditto being in 4 & 5* hotels - the first time I had full whore sex was on one of the highest floors in a Hilton and I was so self conscious turning up in my Dorothy Perkins suit. At the time I felt like such a baller fucking in a suite in the Hilton but now I find myself thinking the decor is awful and the entire chain is overpriced. Ditto fucking someone who does A&R for X label or owns his own distributiony type music stuff. You'll get moments where you think omg! Did I really just fuck X who does Y who knows Z?! before you think "the envelope. GIVE ME THE ENVELOPE. I don't give a toss who you know or who you signed or about the mini-bar wine or that if I look out of this hotel room window I'll get vertigo." Some of my 'friends' thought I led this uber-glam lifestyle and I was the one buying all the drinks on a night out, apparently I had a swanky pad and I was just, you know, super rich and had nothing to ever gripe about, and all my clients were mates with Kings of Leon or whatever they told themselves. You'll hear a lot of glam stories, but I've slept with way more podgy electricians and computer programmers in my bedroom than I have been called to the Malmaisson to be raggydolled around by someone toned and tanned in their uniform.

I second the thoughts of the women who said 18 is too young. I couldn't have done this job at 18, I wasn't cynical enough of life and the human race. You don't have to be a pessimist to do this job - far from it - but you do need that slight life experience that makes you able to read situations far better. Circumstances in my childhood saw me living independently at 18, having had to grow up fast, so its not a slur that you or anyone else in this age group is 18. Far from it. Its that you are going to run into chancers, twats, timewasters and sometimes unscrupulous assholes who see - I'm sorry to use this terminology - 18 year old flesh and have the kind of thoughts you'd rather not see at any age. The sex industry is full of people (males and females) looking to shave a percentage of your earnings because they think its big bucks and sometimes you need the life experience to be able to gauge situations that drop at your feet. You may be different - there are plenty of successful escorts between 18-21. But how will you handle day to day life, leading a very secret, socially frowned upon, profession? Do you have friends you really can 110% trust, that you can confide in - or are you going to have a lot of hangers on? I pretty much fell into this at 25, unable to get a job anywhere else and had rent to pay. I was the last person you'd expect to escort and if I'm honest I found the whole idea did not sit well with my own morals and beliefs. You however might be like me and see beyond your own preconceptions of the industry and see what it offers you financially, and end up liking your job. I retired then came back part time, put it that way - and I hated the thought of it back in the day. YMMV.

chantelheywood

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #12 on: 13 November 2011, 06:32:36 pm »
RR - I really respect your honesty and read your comment about how you had to live independently from 18 and I know what it's like because I'm in that situation, I've been in and out hostels and sofa surfing since I was 16 and I've got my own place now but it's becoming unmanageable as I can't afford my bills anymore. I applied for lots of jobs but then my rent is too expensive when housing benefit doesn't cover the rent. 

I've slept with quite a few people, some of which would make you go 'eww' but I think that for about 5 minutes and move on. I don't really care about the secret bit - nobody really needs to know my business and how I choose to make money. At least I'm not in a pub every night giving it out for nothing with any  old loser in an alleyway. If you get what I mean?

xx

RR

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Re: Has anyone got any advice about starting out?
« Reply #13 on: 13 November 2011, 07:29:53 pm »
Hey Chantel, I'm sorry to hear that. Its pretty crappy being in that position, it was either on my back or miss my rent payment when I started floozying so I understand what its like to feel desperate at the start of it. My first booking was with some sleazy older guy who was obviously some fantasist now I look back on it - nowadays I'd have been able to handle him but at the time he was saying all this stuff about how his wife's an escort and doesn't fuck him cuz she gets too much sex at work yadda yadda. It was too full on and even after having necked 2 double vodkas I was still terrified. I just stood in the corner of the room looking like a rabbit in headlights. It was in an awful cheap studenty type hotel (an Etap I think) and it was SO obvious to the reception I was getting paid for it because they sniggered when I walked by. Anyway I couldn't bring myself to fuck him, I was literally stood in the corner shaking like a leaf. To give the guy credit, he was a sleazeball but when it was pretty obvious I was petrified he just told me to go and keep the money. I felt so stupid, I went home and my flatmate at the time had no idea what was happening but was pouring drinks so I was SO fast on the vodka lol.

By contrast the next booking I took was an outcall to the Hilton and I was determined to get over my nerves. I did what I saw another woman wrote: stood in my local Tesco and watched every bloke that passed me thinking "could I screw him?" And again, it was well sure, if the money was right! My second booking was actually lovely, I was still nervous but felt a lot more in control of it. Granted I pretty much pounced on him as opposed to letting him make the first move - I didn't have to think about it, just do it. I'd never have considered whoring if I wasn't desperate for money though and even for a while when I was whoring I was so desperate to leave the industry. Then I actually missed it! To the point I came back part time! I mean seriously people can shock you lol. I don't miss the sex (its usually crap) and I'm comfortable enough financially from my full time job, but I missed the illictness of it all. And my shoe fund ;D No doubt at some point in my life that urge will fade and I'll just fade from the trade as well. Or I'll fall in love, which is probably more likely as I've always been a bit of a thrillseeker!

I guess all you can do is try it, if you feel thats what your circumstances warrant. Everyone I knew tried to talk me out of it but I don't take charity and to me it was still a job, even if a socially unacceptable one. I know what I would do in your situation, having been there - however only you can make that choice and all I (and others) can do is give you advice to make whatever choice you do with your eyes wide open. I've known people who tried to escort after they saw what it gave me financially but they just couldn't do it. Do not let money become your god though - its very easy to when you are suddenly making more money than you've ever imagined. It is a business at the end of the day, and a successful escort is a successful businesswoman too.

R xox