Hi.
It is terrible of me to walk right onto a forum and start begging for help, but that is what I am doing here.
I don't know any of you and you don't know me so I am going to be brief and hopefully informative so I may get the help I need from you.
Firstly, hello, I am Joanna, I am, I think, what you guys call mature. Ha! God, I hate that! Anyhow, I am so there you go, I can't get away with stating otherwise!
For personal reasons, I have decided that escorting is my only way of digging myself out of a nasty financial hole left after a bad split with my partner last year.
Unfortunately, I have come up against only bad vibes from others so have now told them I was talking about it as I was researching for an article I was writing! I have given up trying to get any help from my friends, they seem to be very against this and, if they believe me or not about the research thing, they are happy to pull the wool over their eyes and NOT TALK ABOUT IT ANYMORE. However, when I have to choose between heating my house and laying food on the table for my children, others opinions of what I do matter little to me. Well, in truth, I am not at that stage yet, but I will be in a few months so need to prevent it happening now.
That is my background information.
I got in touch with an agency, they were very nice, been calling me now for 3 days... They called me today requesting over 300.00 up front for a fee and I had a job on Saturday night to compensate. I thanked them very much and hung up. I have no intention of paying anything up front. That's a little like a builder wanting his cash before he lays a brick, I might be a little green on the escort business, but I did not come down in the last shower. I am not stupid.
I then went on the internet and contacted an agency in Cheltenham, I got very good advice there, I got a no as I am too far away for them to use me and I am too old (I am 36 by the way. I have all my own teeth and hair and no deep set wrinkles yet!! My boobs face forward, not south and as long as I have something of a personality, I know I can do this for the next 3 years, which is all the time I need to make some cash and then start my own design business!) They put me in touch with this forum and suggested I work independently.
I could not find this forum by myself and I looked, I looked for hours...

I need help and I quite desperately need it. I need to know how to begin to work this way. What I need to do. How I advertise. How this all works?
I know there is nothing worse than a person that knows nothing asking questions all the time, I know it's a pain in the backside to have to explain things to a new person. But unless I get advice and pointed in the right direction I am going to make huge mistakes and possibly not be safe.
I know a few things. I have researched this, I am not walking into this job with blinkered eyes. I am fairly smart and confident and I can tell a con when I see it, as I did today.
Is there anybody that would mind please talking me through this on this forum?
I have done nothing but think this job through for months and I am well past the stage where I am nervous about talking about it, meeting people or whipping my knickers off and smiling nicely... I know I am making light of it here, but I am trying to be brief and to the point. I know there is more to it than I have stated.
As far as I am concerned, for me personally, I slept with a man for 10 years for money. That was what my realtionship became, I would rather sleep with strangers for cash than go back and sleep with him for it. At least with  everything up friont and payment made, you both know the rules, you both know where you stand, no nasty mind games are involved and once it's all over, I can return home to a house free of a control freak and live my life how I see fit.
Thanks for reading this.
Joanna.

Hello Alexandra,
Please don't feel sorry for me in any way. It was my choice to walk out the door. I could have stayed, I refused to get told what I could and could not think anylonger.
He promised to make my life tough when I went and indeed he has done so. Nothing for the children, not 1p has come our way in over a year. He has attempted to make things terribly difficult for me but when faced with my not picking up the phone and answering my door, he has actually had a hard time in 'punishing' me.
I have never asked for a penny from him, nor do I want a penny.
I am determined to do this myself.
I am studying a degree now and living day to day on barely any cash.
I was advised by the agency in Cheltenham to work as an independent. I think that is the way I will go. I do not know how to start off but will read the info on here and work it all out.
How did you get going?
It is difficult to sit and read through things when the kids are off school and rushing by the computer every so often, so am having to wait until they are all out or too busy to notice what I am up to!
If I had the energy, I would trawl through it all this evening but am shattered and have got drenched three times today in this fabulous rain! Too weary to take much in this evening.
I will more than likely do it tomorrow.

Thanks for replying to me.
I will speak to you again soon I hope.
Jo.

 

Hi Joanna .

i too started escorting for similar reasons and got negative responses from friends but hey -ho !! I would suggest reading all the advice in this forum and the main advice page , also as money is an issue at the mo i would suggest setting up an ad on Adultwork , you can also set up a free website at Rare Escorts - this is handy because you can then set up a small ad on the punting sites ( most free apart from a few exceptions ) with a link back to your site . I think this is important as one look on any of the  "punting boards " tells you AW is not too popular with some guys , although as said before by others - its been good to me !!  The punting boards /sites are Punternet , punterlink, puntingworld, punterbook (new so not much happening on there yet!) , puntingzone , ForumX , and then theres the local boards too . If you let me know what area your in by Pm ill point you in the right direction if you like to save you searching !!

Also Ive just thought ( silly me !) its no good me telling you to put these ads up if you want to go down the agency route !! I would prefer being an indi myself , as you get !00% of the cash and also get to pick n choose who you see - some agency's just send you to anyone !! Do you have a suitable place to work from as an indi ? I used to work from home when my son was at school in the daytimes - not ideal by any means - but it set me up enough so i could rent a flat for working from . It was an uphill struggle at first but financially its been well worth it in the long run 

Its worth you looking on the boards i mentioned as sometimes girls are advertising for another girl to share with them ( usually nice apartments and cheap rates too !! You definitely sound like a sussed and strong lady , I'm 31 BTW so i must be "mature " also !!! I never knew agency's would  class you as mature at that age !! You could put yourself up as a "MILF" - depends if you like the term or not !! Seems to be popular over on AW !! Also in my exp , guys would prefer a good GFE exp with a girl in her 30s who's got a bit of life exp and can have a good conversation etc , then have a soul less shag with a younger girl. (Not the all the younger girls are like that of course !! ) Personality and being genuine goes a long way in this business . BTW Ive only been doing this just over a year , so I'm no expert , but Ive learnt a lot through exp and reading up online . I'm glad you give the conmen the heave-ho !!! Theres a lot of scams out there. Theres lots of warnings of scams and dodgy punters all over saffe and punting forums - well worth reading up on !! Also if you do join AW be prepared for a LOT of emails from timewasters/ so called male escorts / wannabe photographers /drivers / ect - I'm sure you will weed out the cranks !!!

Cleo XXXX

A lot of thanks to all that replied to me.
I am now facing a free evening where I am going to sit here until I have worked this all out.

I have got the children occupied, yes, that free babysitter called Sky Tv!
Not that they are babies, this would perhaps be easier to do if they were!

Ok. I am a good writer. It's what I am good at. I am qualified as an Interior Designer but have not yet completed my degree, I have had to take time off due to personal rubbish such as having to move house and so on. So I will write you a story, draw you a picture... But... Computers and more so, the internet, I have to ask my 17 year old to lend a hand. I can't ask her on this. I don't know anybody I would trust enough to do this for me either.
I am not going with an agency. I have decided it's far too easy to get conned and I can do without that. I have good instincts and more importantly, I listen to them, I never get a bad feeling about somebody/something and shrug it off. I figure, if I have a negative feeling about a person and I am wrong, then I lost out. It's not a big deal. If I have a bad feeling about somebody and I am right, then I have saved myself a lot of pain.
So, what I am seeing is the need to have a web page. I am going to have to find out how to do that.
Also, my area. Well,  I am not living in a massive city. I am living in Swansea, I am prepared to travel as far out as Cardiff but no further.
Can I work from home? Now that's a tricky one. Not until September for sure as the children are here and then only in school hours. And then in my own bed as I have downsized in my house move out of sheer panic at gas and electric bills! There is no spare room here. Do I want my bedroom treated as my workplace? I am not sure. Am I prepared to use it for such until a certain amount of money has been squirreled away for something else? Well, yes, probably I am. If it is bothering me that much, I will redecorate afterwards, and anyhow, I am only here in this house for the next 6 months. I have to move again then so I can't see, all things considered it being a problem. What I do see as a problem with that is no shower here, just a bath. I am not being over fussy here, but there has to be a shower first, I am happy to join in, but it is taking place. End of.
I need to get another mobile. I can't be answering my mobile to friends and family and also any possible work related calls. I will get confused, I will slip up, I only need a guy with the same name as a friend I have, have the kids running about, make a mistake in the chaos and I am shafted. From what I have seen from my friends, that will be me friendless pretty quickly unfortunately.
As for cars outside all the time. Well, I live on a main road, I live between 2 MOT garages, albeit, spaced out and a nice street to live on, a lot of cars come, stay for an hour and go.
I am not on friendly terms with neighbours so the need to explain any cars will not be necessary.
So that's web page, new phone and possibly outside the home to begin with.

The web page concerns me the most. I can see that is the main route into this and have no idea how to go about it. I have no pictures of  myself at all, will not be wanting my face on them and do not know where to go to have these done. That will be my first consideration. It is what I am going to spend time on from now. Once I have that worked out, I will tackle the rest of the set up, which, in honesty, I think I will manage no problem.

You know, I have got to say something here.
I have spent months worried about new school uniforms, and yes, Christmas, in July/August. This morning I woke up and for the first time in ages did not feel blind panic at the thought I will never get it all done.
I know I have a long way to go with this but I feel for the first time, I can get things done and although I am not stupid enough to think I will have no down moments (that's a pun really, right there, Ha!) I am prepared for them and will get through them. I am more confident about the next couple of years than I have been for a long time.
jo

Oh, and there are alternatives to being online. You can see if there's a local paper or ads paper that sex workers advertise in, although that requires you to field a lot of calls, giving your details each time, and I think guys who call are more likely to be looking for incalls than outcalls.

You could work in a parlour, depending on the local situation. Working in a parlour is legal but operating one isn't. Whether the police are into raiding them varies by region; some love to be tough on them while others are happy to have them as long as they're run well. Local papers are the best place to find them, if those sorts of ads are accepted.

I think this is an escort. What's with the qualified stuff? Is that to make the paper happy? Lets call this a massage service then we are turning a blind eye and all is well?

Absolutely right!

Aside from that there are the ususal massage parlours advertised. They have been around for years,  God, really, I have known about them for years anyhow, so they must not get busted by the police. I think I am too old to go for a massage parlour though.

Have a look at the review sites (they will call them 'field reports') for the local parlours and you may be surprised at the ages of the staff reported. It is decidely different from independent or agency escorting though, with pluses and minuses to consider.

Consider Travelodge for incalls - a room can be had for a day for ?19 and they tend to be nicely anonymous. See other posts here for more reasons not to do them at home.

Webpages are easier than they look, honestly. Personally I think charging ?30 a month to do a basic 'about/services/fees/links' site is receiving watersports, but some people see that as a fraction of a booking a month and are happy.

I simply don't understand their, either, outright negativity towards it or their, let's not talk about that stuff attitude

Lots and lots of people think what you're considering is illegal. Others will have 'it better not be my partner you're seeing'-type thoughts.

Hello.
Had a strange night out last night... All around me were drunk and I was the driver for the night, my choice.
We were at a raft race and band thing at the river.
I was so busy thinking all this through I was not really with it for the whole night.
Got my credit card bill after the uniform shop yesterday and am 50.00 over the limit now.
Got the bill for my new oven yesterday.
Had to use money to fill up with petrol that I had in a box for emergencies. Main reason I was driver was so that I could get water all night free from the jug on the bar.
I now have to go about the house collecting together all coins to change at the coin thing in the shop for food for next few days.
Looking in, you would never guess it I suppose, nice car, nice clothes, nice kids, all nice, all lovely, but really, come on, breathing costs money these days.
I was thinking about all this last night and feeling very p***ed off as to how I came to end up here in this position when some guy quite well known around here for being rather loaded came on to me and not for the first time.
He keeps asking friends to 'put a good word in' for him, with me I mean.
I am just not interested.
I have to get myself out of this mess I am in, until I make a start at that I can not contemplate a life where going on a date is okay again and having a good laugh is okay again.
Many think I have been stupid for walking from a guy with a good job and money was never an issue but many didn't know him the way I know him. I have given up trying to explain it.
I have a quiet determination about me to do this and help myself until my degree is over and I can hopefully get self employed, failing that, I can go work for another and also, have savings from this. I am intending upon being terribly tight with what I earn, putting the vast majority of it by after bills are all paid off. There will be no holidays and big purchases, not many new clothes, to others looking in, all will be as it is now, nothing will give away the fact I have cash coming in. I can't risk being in this position ever again. I have to look sharp and watch my own back. I have learned that a man, even the father of your children, is not to be relied upon to see you right at the end of the day.
To see friends all laughing and joking last night while I sat sober and watched on was a strange experience given what was on my mind.
On Tuesday I am getting a mobile. I am getting a wax. A BADLY needed one!  No money for anything until then.
On Wednesday I think, I will place an add in the paper. I think I can do it online. I know how to word it.
If/when I get anything sounding like a call that is not a crank or a threat I am going to go and you know, I think that first time I shall s**t a brick! Honestly. It's a good job I can act my way out of anything and have had years of practice at sleeping with a guy I hated the sight of never mind the touch of. Once you get into the whole lets pretend this is the best I ever had, it's not so difficult to see it through to the end and what's more, I can walk away right after it, no more of that locking myself in the bathroom and wishing I could fall of the face of the planet rather than go back to bed and go to sleep pretending to be all happy and dandy with one guy that I hated.

I think I will rather, once kids are at school again, my own home to a travelodge. It's more comfortable and I am more comfortable here than I would be up the road in the services which is where the nearest travelodge is.
I don't need to do this multiple times a day. I don't need to do it every day of the week. To pay off bills steadily and keep head above water I need only get 4/5 a week. If I am pricing correctly here.
I am unsure of pricing I have an idea but would appreciate some clues for that if you don't mind.
I am wishing the kids back at school already so I could work from home, that would be easier than driving out to a strange house I think. There is always my mother though, I am guessing a few hours at their nans would not be turned down by the kids and  luckily, nobody but me in the family drives and she lives too far away for the kids to walk home. Also, none of my friends ever call around without calling on the phone first which is a plus.
Again, thank you all for your advice.
I shall let you know how I fare over the next week.
Ha! It's funny because for the first time in a long time I am getting out all the 'nice' bits of underwear, and thinking of what condoms to get and toys to buy. To be honest, once the initial nerves are out of the way, I am not actually sure who will get the most of a kick out of this at times, the guy or myself. To have sex with a guy and completely not care if he is doing it with somebody else, where he was last night, and all that sort of stuff will be a blast. Just total freedom to get laid and lay somebody else and walk away after with no care really as to anything about him. Quite liberating.

Hi Anika
Yes, I think I am all ready to go. I have had a scream looking at all the sex toys online, really. I was up writing late last night, as is normal, sleeping is escaping me these days, think the school holidays have messed up my whole routine, so to wind down before sleep I went to various sites to check out what was about now as frankly, life with the ex partner was not great for the last couple of years and boy, have things moved on since I last looked at the toy market! It was brilliant fun. Shame I have to wait until tomorrow to actually buy these things.
Planning on getting the condoms online anyhow. Saves the red faced moment at the counter in boots with the little old lady behind me or the pain in the ass small child that just keeps staring at you be you purchasing toothpaste or condoms! That'll be one for it's mother to explain though. Ha!
I am prepared for the guys that withold their number. My home number is automatically witheld anyhow, so I plan on explaining to any that unless they call back with a number I will not be bothering and also telling them why, nicely. I know that sometimes people don't think about the reasons why so I will not just hang up, I will explain and inform. I think I will guess a piss taker and I will get a gut feeling for a weirdo.
A buddy, I have looked on here and can't see that there are many about, I was tired when reading it though, I will read it again and request one.
Do you think there is anything wrong with calling up an escort in the paper and explaining my situation here and asking them? There is one in the paper and she must be local, that may be worth it. I just am hesitant as I don't want her to think I am a nutter and I know not all girls are as accomodating about making friends and watching each others backs. She might be hostile that I am working her patch, so to speak?
I don't know. This is my only point of concern on the whole matter really.
Not the sex. Up for it. Not the plain strange calls, that's what the red end call button is for. Not the nerves of going out the door the first time, try something that frightens you now and again, live life, as my Nan said. Nothing bothers me much about this other than a friend - A person that knows where I am and will wait on a call to know I am safe, sometimes, with all the instincts in the world, another can pull the wool over your eyes. Short of taking a mega phone to scream for help with me, I am concerned about a lack of friend to call.

Jo