Interesting thread 

I don't have more "trust issues" with men now than I had them before. I've always trusted  the men I've been with  unless they gave me a reason not to (which has happened a couple of times, and yes, I discovered they were cheating on me). This job hasn't changed my trust in men at all (as I believe there's a lot of men out there who don't cheat) but it HAS changed (big time) my views on marriage. I'm completely appalled of all the marriages  out there who carry on for years sharing zero intimacy and living like flatmates. I have all these married clients who just long to be touched and cuddled because they're not getting it at home. I read mumsnet  forum sometimes  and I hear the married women complaining about the same thing. I personally find all this -lack of intimacy with a partner- quite depressing to be honest, and it has totally put me off from getting married. Maybe had I done a different line of work I wouldn't have been faced with the "harsh realities of marriage" and would still be glamorizing the "sacred institution" (lol).

I just can't understand how you cannot share an intimate life with your partner. I would go bonkers. 

Interesting thread 

I don't have more "trust issues" with men now than I had them before. I've always trusted  the men I've been with  unless they gave me a reason not to (which has happened a couple of times, and yes, I discovered they were cheating on me). This job hasn't changed my trust in men at all (as I believe there's a lot of men out there who don't cheat) but it HAS changed (big time) my views on marriage. I'm completely appalled of all the marriages  out there who carry on for years sharing zero intimacy and living like flatmates. I have all these married clients who just long to be touched and cuddled because they're not getting it at home. I read mumsnet  forum sometimes  and I hear the married women complaining about the same thing. I personally find all this -lack of intimacy with a partner- quite depressing to be honest, and it has totally put me off from getting married. Maybe had I done a different line of work I wouldn't have been faced with the "harsh realities of marriage" and would still be glamorizing the "sacred institution" (lol).

I just can't understand how you cannot share an intimate life with your partner. I would go bonkers. 

Marriage without physical intimacy can still be amazing.
It?s a partnership, its having someone on your side though life?s challenges, Its having someone who really understands you, it?s having a mate on tap whenever you want to go somewhere and do something, it?s having someone to experience with, plan with and dream with. The longer you are together, the more you have a shared history, the better it is (unless you drive each other mad).
Modern life is hectic and I think with so much going on you can fall out of the habit of physical intimacy and then you get used to not having it and then it becomes strange and an effort to kick it off at all. It?s not a show stopper when you have a full married, kids, job, interests type life, the importance of intimacy is only small (maybe 10% of a happy marriage if it?s perfect), so you can be very happily married without it.
Many of the guys I see are happily married apart from that one aspect. Give them a kiss and a cuddle and send them back to their life/wife just a little happier and more fulfilled. I honestly think we can help marriages to survive and prosper and to get through the few points in time where sex seems vitally important to the husband and less so to the wife.
We are like a charity, we provide a service, we keep people together. In some cases the alternative to visiting a prossie is visiting a divorce lawyer. If that happens you still get f*cked, it just costs more !


ooops sorry, Rose tinted rant now over

Marriage without physical intimacy can still be amazing.
It�s a partnership, its having someone on your side though life�s challenges, Its having someone who really understands you, it�s having a mate on tap whenever you want to go somewhere and do something, it�s having someone to experience with, plan with and dream with. The longer you are together, the more you have a shared history, the better it is (unless you drive each other mad).
Modern life is hectic and I think with so much going on you can fall out of the habit of physical intimacy and then you get used to not having it and then it becomes strange and an effort to kick it off at all. It�s not a show stopper when you have a full married, kids, job, interests type life, the importance of intimacy is only small (maybe 10% of a happy marriage if it�s perfect), so you can be very happily married without it.

Love is great, but sex is a human need Lucy, like eating or like breathing. There's people with higuer sex drives and those with lower sex drives who can live happily having sex once very 3 months yes.I for sure couldn't lead a sexless life. It would drive me crazy. Repressing your sexual needs can do quite some harm to you -psychologically speaking-.

We are like a charity, we provide a service, we keep people together

Speak for yourself, I'm for sure no charity lol!, I charge quite a lot of money for my service. Like a plumber or a doctor.

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Love is great, but sex is a human need Lucy, like eating or like breathing. There's people with higher sex drives and those with lower sex drives who can live happily having sex once very 3 months yes.I for sure couldn't lead a sexless life. It would drive me crazy. Repressing your sexual needs can do quite some harm to you -psychologically speaking-.

(http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/60/Maslow%27s_Hierarchy_of_Needs.svg/450px-Maslow%27s_Hierarchy_of_Needs.svg.png)

I'm with Ana30 and Maslow on this one, as far as the hierarchy of human needs go.

Interesting thread 

I don't have more "trust issues" with men now than I had them before. I've always trusted  the men I've been with  unless they gave me a reason not to (which has happened a couple of times, and yes, I discovered they were cheating on me). This job hasn't changed my trust in men at all (as I believe there's a lot of men out there who don't cheat) but it HAS changed (big time) my views on marriage. I'm completely appalled of all the marriages  out there who carry on for years sharing zero intimacy and living like flatmates. I have all these married clients who just long to be touched and cuddled because they're not getting it at home. I read mumsnet  forum sometimes  and I hear the married women complaining about the same thing. I personally find all this -lack of intimacy with a partner- quite depressing to be honest, and it has totally put me off from getting married. Maybe had I done a different line of work I wouldn't have been faced with the "harsh realities of marriage" and would still be glamorizing the "sacred institution" (lol).

I just can't understand how you cannot share an intimate life with your partner. I would go bonkers. 

In my normal job there are 2 long time married ladies.. they are the ones who are frumpy dont look after themselves and they shun sex..  One them even said that she thinks her husband is seeing escorts.. I dont get why they stay in a relationship... Id be climbing the walls with nothing to look forward too.. are they really staying with their partners cos of the life insurance   have never ever got it  or am I just sooo cynical lol x

Foxydeelight, i think its fear, lack of ambition and just conforming to what they see as normal.
the whole better the devil you know thing i guess.
 ....and that all time pathetic reason number one....Fear of loneliness

Foxydeelight, i think its fear, lack of ambition and just conforming to what they see as normal.
the whole better the devil you know thing i guess.
 ....and that all time pathetic reason number one....Fear of loneliness

   what a way to see life passing by:'(    fills my being with sadness for them x

That is rather a sexist remark.  I don't think it fits guys anymore than gals.  Many people of both sexes settle for something less than they could achieve because of fear of loneliness.

From personal experience I've always found that men have a harder time coping with singledom than women (but that's just me). ej: I've seen how when relationships sour it's always women who takes the first step, or also in the case of widowing/divorce it's always the female who manages to find much more of a balance in her newfound "singledom status". Divorced and widowed men turn a bit into a "mess" when facing that same singledom status. Maybe I'm being sexist but this is what I see around me.