Interesting thread
I don't have more "trust issues" with men now than I had them before. I've always trusted the men I've been with unless they gave me a reason not to (which has happened a couple of times, and yes, I discovered they were cheating on me). This job hasn't changed my trust in men at all (as I believe there's a lot of men out there who don't cheat) but it HAS changed (big time) my views on marriage. I'm completely appalled of all the marriages out there who carry on for years sharing zero intimacy and living like flatmates. I have all these married clients who just long to be touched and cuddled because they're not getting it at home. I read mumsnet forum sometimes and I hear the married women complaining about the same thing. I personally find all this -lack of intimacy with a partner- quite depressing to be honest, and it has totally put me off from getting married. Maybe had I done a different line of work I wouldn't have been faced with the "harsh realities of marriage" and would still be glamorizing the "sacred institution" (lol).
I just can't understand how you cannot share an intimate life with your partner. I would go bonkers.
Marriage without physical intimacy can still be amazing.
It?s a partnership, its having someone on your side though life?s challenges, Its having someone who really understands you, it?s having a mate on tap whenever you want to go somewhere and do something, it?s having someone to experience with, plan with and dream with. The longer you are together, the more you have a shared history, the better it is (unless you drive each other mad).
Modern life is hectic and I think with so much going on you can fall out of the habit of physical intimacy and then you get used to not having it and then it becomes strange and an effort to kick it off at all. It?s not a show stopper when you have a full married, kids, job, interests type life, the importance of intimacy is only small (maybe 10% of a happy marriage if it?s perfect), so you can be very happily married without it.
Many of the guys I see are happily married apart from that one aspect. Give them a kiss and a cuddle and send them back to their life/wife just a little happier and more fulfilled. I honestly think we can help marriages to survive and prosper and to get through the few points in time where sex seems vitally important to the husband and less so to the wife.
We are like a charity, we provide a service, we keep people together. In some cases the alternative to visiting a prossie is visiting a divorce lawyer. If that happens you still get f*cked, it just costs more !
ooops sorry, Rose tinted rant now over